ikri

Well that was unexpected

What the fuck just happened? We score a goal via a deflection, our opponents have a perfectly good goal ruled out, the referee didn't blow his whistle every time a Liverpool player stumbled, we scored on the counter and we kept a clean sheet. This isn't what I've come to expect from watching Newcastle recently (though who only knows what would have happened if Liverpool had scored). We did look a lot better today though, the midfield in particular wasn't shockingly inept.

Utter wank, can't think of any positives other than putting more pressure on the manager (& captain) to leave.

Coloccini-McClaren murder-suicide would suffice

They seem to have no idea how to win the ball and have no clue what to do with it when Palace give possession away.

That defending, just fucking atrocious

We'll end up with Coloccini as player-manager, no point in getting your hopes up for someone competent.

Utter shite performance, just staggeringly inept all over the pitch. Fuck knows what the plan today was meant to be but whatever it was it didn't work and we don't seem to have a plan b (this goes back years, current tactics not working? try the same again but this time with the players who you didn't think good enough to be part of the starting XI!). This club needs a massive clearout at every level. In an ideal world start with a new owner but at the very least get rid of the useless penfold-looking secretary that's currently running the club. Get a manager who can get a team playing to whatever strengths we might have. Get a captain who isn't less inspiring than a limp cucumber sandwich. Supporting this club is a struggle and it's getting to the point where I really don't give a shit when we inevitably lose.

Absolute fucking farce

Meanwhile the top teams form a bonfire circle around the ref on the regular with no risk of punishment. When is the fucking corruption scandal going to finally break. Jesus I can't wait. There will be no corruption scandal. That's not to say there isn't any corruption though. According to the secret footballer, he talked to a referee and the referee said that Scudamore once told them“And, remember, you’re not in a sport, you are part of the entertainment business. We don’t want our top players being sent off every week because it’s bad for the brand. We want them on the pitch as much as possible.” For some reason nobody seems to care about this Not in the Premiership yet, but there's a bit of a scandal brewing in Spain. Anyone believe that it's limited to Spain?

Wijnaldum was just outstanding. Defending was just as terrifying as usual but going forward we were pretty fucking good (feels weird thinking that)

Can't really disagree with that, but at the same time over the last few seasons we've had players like Alan Smith, Shola, Obertan, Williamson, Gosling and now Coloccini & Cisse who consistently get picked each week no matter how badly they perform - Alan Smith couldn't even pass the ball 10m to a teammate without fucking up. The message that the rest of the team receive is why bother trying when you'll get paid, retain your place on your team and possibly even be made captain no matter how badly you perform. What we need is genuine competition for places, a captain with actual leadership skills and a manager with a ruthless streak who will drop players who don't perform.

Bit of both. We could have had 2 penalties but overall we've not deserved anything from the game.

All pretty crap so far.

Pathetic

Positives - no one has been sent off yet Negatives - everything else What a pile of wank

Quite possibly the dodgiest penalty I've ever seen given

Decent result

Lovely play by Mitrovic

Disappointed to see him sign for such a nothing team, but I can't really blame him too much. He gets to play for a manager who will let him do pretty much whatever he wants, he's pretty much guaranteed to play every week and be the biggest fish in a very small pond, plus he's going to be paid a truckload of cash to do so

I've just assumed for a while now that "Lee Ryder" is actually just the pen name of the automated programme that someone cobbled together as a cheap alternative to this that writes stories without requiring any human interaction. Associated Press already use something similar for finance and sports reporting.

About time, he's alienated fans and players, I don't think there's a role at the club that he could fill where he wouldn't be working with someone who hated him. Charnley next please

Clark did well when he had Derek Fazackerley working alongside him at Huddersfield. If we're looking at appointing a Clark as a coach we'd be far better off looking at the guy who actually did all the coaching for Clark.

Fantastic team goal

We've been utterly shite for the last few seasons, flirting with relegation for the last 3. Even if he's utter wank as a head coach the club wouldn't be that much worse off. Mediocre would be a massive improvement. If he actually turns out to be any good then we all win. Worth the gamble imo