Ronaldo

What the fuck do you expect, leadership?

Oh, talent, yeah. Not a legend, though.

Michael Owen a PL legend ffs. Aye, right.

Well, that tends to happen when you refuse to pay money for them.

If it's actually you, let me just say I've missed you and this represents a very good start to 2016.

You're all gorgeous, with few exceptions. Happy new year! x

Best of luck to him if true. Terrible defender who should never have played Premier League football but tried his best and also tried to get the best out of those around him.

A pretty shit team, he means.

Nah, Thauvin's better looking and earns far more money.

Yeah, that really doesn't address the issues mentioned, though.

As hard as I'm trying I still can't see Allardyce ever getting a side relegated. Would be incredibly sweet, though.

Give it a week.

Darts on laptop, football on tele - perfect. Aye, other way round for me. Don't want to see that shithole in high def.

The shittest defence in the league and no proven goalscorer in the entire squad and you're still at it, man. Give over.

I can't hate him. He's a decent guy probably doing his best. He is a total fucking pansy, though, and I've very little respect for him and zero faith he can turn this around.

Gutting. Great guy who was always so nice to me and my family at the training ground. RIP

Shawcross would probably break our transfer record. No way we'd pay that for an English defender in his late 20s. He's exactly what we need, though. Someone to slap the likes of Janmaat into shape, too.

Bout time we produced a top drawer CB, mind. Been a while. Phil fucking Jagielka starting games, man.

One shot on target equates to 'very good' now? It's sad, how willingly thick so many of our fans are.

The criticism's mostly aimed at the club, not him. He's out of his depth and that's not his fault. If we're talking about his abilities though I must say his complete lack of pace worries me. To overcome that you've got to have it between your ears and he just seems like someone that'd take a long time to acquire that. Honestly, though. Signing solely him for so much money when you've got ready made PL strikers available for less is looking ludicrous. It typifies our brainless recruitment policy. We deserve relegation on the back of such decisions.

At HT the mongs were talking about him being better than Krul. Fucking despair.

We played alright in the second half, so he has a point. A point.

Why do you insist on asking such annoying questions Ian? It's painfully obvious we need a new main striker.

Hit and miss? I hope you meant that literally instead of in the metaphorical sense. He has 3 goals. It's nearly January. His finishing's been crap so far.

He's a pansy, man. Wanted the 0-0. No balls.