Ronaldo

You live in a completely fictional world like, York.

Pointless this stupid fucking guff. If we appoint Vieira it'll just be Carver in charge within months anyway.

Indeed. Improvement doesn't even begin to infer suitability when improvement can be constituted in this case simply by subtraction.

The unsackable Pardew is English, our current 'head coach' is English and our (by all accounts) top target is English.

And that's half the issue. He knows his worth as a man. The first time Ashley/Charnley tell him a fib he'll be off (and rightly so) and we'll be left with that horrible retard complete with farcical Bobby impersonation managing the team.

Surely he can't be worse than Carver? Oh shut up, man. Nobody came close to suggesting he'd be worse than Carver.

I think Vieira would be an unmitigated disaster. He's headstrong/principled, unproven and short-term. No thanks.

None of which are in the Premier League.

Yorkie once made reference to the fact he doesn't take much notice of football away from NUFC. Since that day he's gone out of his way to prove it.

Good talent. Replacement for Janmaat.

Joe Kinnear with latter stage dementia is on a different planet to Carver, mind.

Into the next putrid era? Yes.

Yeah, utter stupidity to get rid of Cisse. He's proved he's the best player in the league at scoring goals with limited service.

The defence I don't even want to discuss. No real cover in the full-back positions, Haidara is obviously a WIP and the CBs are all worse than average and past their best with the exception of Dummett - who's also a WIP.

Wish McClaren would just say yes so we can end this utter farce and vaguely move forward beyond this putrid era.

I'm fairly happy with a midfield of Sissoko, Colback/Anita, de Jong. Out wide and up front we're in dire need of quality signings, though.

Taking players out of their comfort zone sounds good until you consider he might ask Colo to mark someone. He'd be a disaster.

If Pete Graves has got this info from the club you can bet it's some sort of attempt to convince McClaren to accept a derisory salary.

I still can't get over the Given hatred, like. I wouldn't want to waste my career at Sports Direct FC playing behind David Edgar either.

Poor Shay. He'd have saved both of them 10 years ago.

You're a bright lad with self-respect, though. John Carver is a brainless, shameless creep.

Someone put a fair wedge on Jocelyn yesterday.

He's picked up a good living for 6 1/2 years in return for 2 memorable PL goals and fuck all else. He's the last player deserving of sympathy. Utterly abysmal footballer.

Contracts of Taylor, Williamson and Coloccini all expire in a year. Interesting.