Ronaldo

He's quite right, though. The Chelsea fans have had a wealth of great players, great personalities and great managers to support over the last 12 years. And they're still the shittest fans around.

Well, I did. Remember that next time you trot into the ground thinking it makes no difference.

Are you blind, Heza? I included the TV revenue.

If I'm not mistaken the closest Ashley has come to selling occurred while we were in the Championship.

Our annual turnover is £130m - a massive piece of that 'mag-pie' comes from matchday/TV revenue created entirely by fans attending. That's what we should be concerned with. Not zero-hour contracts.

Bit of a stretch to blame Britain when the real issue with Ashley is the fact our own fans are too spineless to stop giving him money.

I think QPR are going down.

Even with him playing deep? That's the main reason he's got fewer. LVG's used him to do the work for the players around him.

It sounds cruel but there's something wrong when Harry Kane is getting more PL goals than Sergio Aguero, so I'm supremely glad that isn't going to be the case.

I said that last week. I still think if both sides even remotely show up we'll lose, mind.

And the fact there's a reason Jonas has 6 goals in about 150 Premier League games. When it comes to kicking a football he's not very good.

Medical.

Yep. Still a terrible footballer, in spite of his work rate.

They were playing against teams that weren't playing for a draw, for one.

As I said he did a decent job under the circumstances. He's proved beyond a shadow of a doubt he isn't a PL manager, though.

I don't think he's a very good football manager and only pointed that out when history was rewritten with regard to his tenure at NUFC.

I don't have one tiny spec of hatred for Chris Hughton. He's a smashing guy who did a decent enough job here. Obviously I was playfully referring to Wullie's insistence (when we sacked him) that he'd be top top manager.

I wish I had the answers. Obviously there are players in there all the time, I guess my accent's a lot different to the regular clientele and I asked for a certain table for 6 people. Within seconds I was questioned about 'the injury' and being told how much the team missed me.

I really don't think so and no.

You can see by his shape he has 2 fantastic lungs on him. It's just a shame his stamina is really the only useful attribute he has left.

They get treated like Roman Gods in there, man. I phoned up once and was mistaken for Ryan Taylor by the waiter/maître d on the other end. The bloke practically offered a blowjob with my table. Ridiculous.

Well done. I dislike the amount of cheating Barca do but the right team is certainly going to win the league.

In spite of all the good work your mate Chrissy H did there, too. Gutted.

That's more like a completely pointless and unrealistic idea.

Ronaldo, man. What a dick.