Ronaldo

People need to stop with the well-wishing and give the silly bastard nothing. He's addicted to staying relevant and the only way to accomplish that in 2015 is to make a complete cunt out of himself.

Building the team around someone who'd retired?

How is this idiot not locked up, man?

That I agree with. Big difference between that and dogshit, mind.

Every time Carver opens his mouth he takes one massive steaming piss on the history of Newcastle United. Dreadful human being. Waste of life.

If he played for us he'd be loved, as Tiote was for years for no apparent reason.

I'm hoping this isn't serious.

Christ.

Those were games we had ambitions to win, though. Might as well just get his horror debut out the way.

He speaks from the heart without really thinking things through. Nowt wrong with that, so long as he isn't antagonising the fans like 3 of our past 5 managers have done.

Let's be honest, this Satka's gonna get plenty of rapings when he finally gets into the side. May as well have then sooner against a good side. If he's get anything remotely about him it'll do far more good than harm.

All in the delivery.

Sake. I made that comparison in January.

Repugnant.

He's far better than Jagielka, Shawcross. Ridiculous to keep ignoring him.

Carver's PR has actually been worse than I anticipated, which I think constitutes a minor miracle.

Terry is England's best CB by a mile. Criminal that he isn't starting for (and captaining) us with Cahill.

Not a chance. There's only one CB I'd legitimately want starting for NUFC ffs.

Lacking at least 3 top class defenders. Good squad, though.

There's nothing remotely great about him. He's a good PL striker, no more.

Bono. What an absolute fucking anal bead.

I doubt it. Look at the state of our 3rd choice keeper. I don't even want to imagine what our 5th choice CB looks like given how crap the others are, Dummett excepted.

What a tool.

And they also had a top keeper who although not vocal had experience, and Nobby Solano. Sibierski was also at the very least an out ball.