Chris_R

The left-footed Hatem Ben Arfa.

So far we've created two chances by my reckoning. Two. I don't count Santon having a punt from 30 yards as "Creating a chance". Be interested to see where everyone plays here. Looks like after 60 minutes with the wingers on the wrong sides of a 4-3-3, he's finally gone 4-4-2 and immediately put the wingers on the wrong wings again. Where's that "facedesk" jpeg when you need it?

So today it's 4-5-1 with Shola wide right? I fucking despair. See, I can't call it a 4-3-3 as that's when the wide players are on the opposite sides and can cut in and shoot. Instead we've got a right-footed Shola on the right side, and a left footed HBA on the left. And only Ba up front. So Shola and Benny will be nicely placed to beat their man and get a cross in (Yeah, I know, Shola.) but they only have Demba Ba to aim at. At home. Against West Brom. If we win it will be despite Pardew, not because of him. (Having laughed at Shola's wing play potential, he's just put a peach of a cross onto Demba's head. )

To anyone still not convinced about why we need people on their correct sides, ask yourself what your favourite period of watching Newcastle play 4-4-2 was. It'll almost certainly (Unless you're 10 years old or stark raving mad) be Keegan or Robson's tenures. And the wide players then? Well Bobby had Robert and Solano backed by Bernard and Griffin respectively, while Keegan had Ginola and Gillespie with Beresford and Venison bombing past them on the flanks. And you know what? IT FUCKING WORKS. Brilliantly. Was anyone suggesting that Robert play on the right or Solano or Gillespie on the left? Or swap the fullbacks round? No? Because it would have been crazy, and completely negated their effectiveness and the team as a whole would have suffered. Our strikers especially would have been starved of effective service.

Ben Arfa, Gutierrez and Santon today. That's 3/4 of our wide players. Only Simpson will be on his best side and he's terrified of a football so is no use whatsoever going forward. OK, Ben Arfa's so bloody talented that it's largely irrelevant for him, but as a team game it's fucking shit to have so many players on the wrong side. There's no service to the strikers as nobody can beat a man on the outside and get a cross in. Every single time they'll have to stop, check back, and play an inswinging cross in with their stronger foot that will be cleared easily by the defenders who've had time to compose themselves and are facing away from goal. We're completely negating our strikers, wingers and fullbacks effectiveness by doing this, and we do it every bloody week. Under a 4-3-3 its different, as the 2 wide men play as auxiliary strikers rather than wingers, so I can see the logic of having people on the wrong sides there. But not in a 4-4-2, it's utter dogshit.

Not saying he's had no input at all in transfers, I'm sure its discussed and he says his piece. But Carr's the one pulling the strings there for the most part and he's done a bloody good job.

Carr and the scouting team get the players in, so Pardew can take little credit from us having Cabaye, Tiote, HBA, Cisse, Ba etc. Pardew's job is to take that collection of undoubtedly talented individuals and turn them into a flowing side. He's completely failing at this. Things he's good at: - Comes across well on TV - Seems to have built a strong team spirit - Players like him Things he's not good at: - Playing the right players in the right positions (I'm going to continue banging the "Put players on their natural side in a 4-4-2" drum until everyone in the world hears it) - Selecting the right formation for the players we have available Shola ahead of Cisse is starting to look like West Ham where he played some lumbering carthorse like Harewood ahead of Tevez and some other plank (Mullins?) ahead of Mascherano. I've still got faith in him and we could have a far worse manager, but he's never going to be top class until he addresses the negatives. And they're not small negatives, they're pretty bloody big and basic.

He looked uncomfortable because he's not played there for fucking ages. Read everyone's posts above, based almost exclusively on him playing on the left. The consensus seems to be "good defender, likes to get forward, but is shit at it and has no end product". Really? Could that possibly be linked to having to cut inside every single time because he's unable to cross with his left? After being given fuckloads of unproductive games on the left should we really write off his ability to play on the right after what, 60 minutes? This cutting inside from the left thing, how's that working for him exactly? Scored many has he? Got many assists? Sure, we've already been reminded that he set up a goal V Chelsea but after the number of games he's played on the left then I'd suggest that if we can only summon up one or two assists for him we're rapidly descending into infinite monkeys / infinte typewriter territory.

Santon could be great if Pardew has an ounce of sense and switches him to his proper position on the right.

Anyone can score a goal, so welcome though that is it shouldn't be the defining factor in "having a good game", but I really thought he played very well tonight. We've seen his raw place enough in the past to know that's there, but he showed some real skill as well at times in getting past his man tonight. I thought he, Ferguson and Sameobi were excellent tonight.

Was fantastic tonight. Every time he got the ball he looked to take his man on, and even better than that he actually had the talent to beat them with raw skill. Could be a really exciting player.

Far too early to say Anita's a poor player, but all I've seen so far is: + Energy + Tidy passing + Quite quick - Not showing any ability to take people on - Only passing over short disance - Not showing any shooting ability - Not looking like he can put tackles in Maybe some of those minuses can be turned round in time as he shows more, but that's what I'm seeing now.

Looks 4-3-3 to me. Midfield of Anita, Chopper and Mini-Cheik Wide men in Bulbheed and Sambo Cisse up top. Bench is pretty awesome though. Hope we play well enough to not need them.

Jonas is shot, offers nothing any more at this level. If he's one of our "purples" it's a bit worrying. We need to sort our flanks out and where our attacks are going to come from. I know we were down to 10 for most of the game so it's unfair to judge on this game alone, but I'm judging over the season so far and we've been pretty dreadful for long spells.

Bet that during the return leg they will yet again be wearing their home kit though. Always seems to be the case, we play in our away kit there but they play in their home kit here. It's not a big issue as things go, but it's an incomprehensible annoyance.

Whyever the hell not? It's work, ffs. I'm not late for work once every 6 weeks, neither are my colleagues. We're all, almost to a man (Or woman), on time every day barring some terrible crisis or road closure. And I bet his hours of work are a damn site more sociable than mine are. Should just give the fucker a verbal warning next time he's late, it's what happens in most jobs with people who are reapetedly late. Then for his second instance give him a written, then a final, then sack him. Late 4 times and he's out. They could probably have him out the door in a month, not that they don't already have grounds to do that now mind.

I want HBA to score. I want him to weave majestically past every single one of their players before sitting Mingolet on his arse and rolling it into an empty net. I want them to be forced to admit that he's a fucking genius, and that their players aren't even fit to lace his boots.

Just realised I've booked to go to the doctors for a blood test next week. On Monday At 8:30am. WHAT WAS I THINKING!

Whether this sentence is too harsh or not is a bit of a side issue to me. The point is he's an utter buffoon who has had about 20 chances so far and has fucked up every time. If he had an ounce of sense, which he obviously hasn't, he'd stop indoors and never go down town again, get his life together, stop being a dick and get himself in to training nice and early every morning. He seems to have no grasp of cause and effect and the fact that he even puts himself in the position where this sort of thing even has a chance of happening just highlights what an utter cretin he is.

Actually I think 20 fires is an understatement by a long way. Seems to have become a coordinated attempt to get the match abandoned.

There's about 20 fires in the stands now ffs. Just crazy scenes.

Handled on the ground by the defender who fell over. Hard to tell if it was intentional or not as the TV angle is a bit shit, but it looked like it definitely struck his hand and he made no attempt to get his arm out of the way.

One of my favourite players of all time. I just love players who can beat a man with skill. Zidane, Messi, Ronaldinho, Ginola, Ben Arfa, Gascoigne. Not that I'm saying the last 3 are as good as the first three by any means, just that they're my favourite players because of how they've approached the game, and obviously Ginola, HBA and Gazza did it in a Newcastle shirt which made it far more enjoyable for me as a spectator than watching better players do it for other teams. Zidane was glorious, imperious, majestic even to watch. Messi has the goals and will in all doubt finish with incredible statistics come the end of his career, but Zidane was just technically magnificent.

You see, it's not though, is it? What Tiote did was a cautionable offence by both the laws of the game and the definition of word "dissent". I even posted both of them above. Common sense is completely f***ing irrelevant. Howard Webb, and every other referee works from this: http://www.thefa.com/thefa/rulesandregulations/~/media/Files/PDF/the-fa-2012-13/fifa-laws-of-the-game-2012-13.ashx Now you can debate his performance in relation to other incidents all you like (But I'd still suggest cross-referencing with the above, for clarity), but in relation to this decision he got it absolutely right. However there is someone to blame for Tiote's booking. Sadly, it's Tiote. Hmm, on occasion. Fair enough to the letter of the law he's guilty. A bit of consistency across the board would be nice, though. On occasion? To the letter of the law? FFS. Get the fucking black and white specs off and look at this dispassionately. His was the most flagrant display of dissent I've seen in a long time and he deserved every single bit of his yellow card. Consistency isn't relevant here, this isn't some kind of borderline decision that we're looking at here, it's the clearest yellow for dissent that has been handed out this year. It was embarrassing watching him.

You see, it's not though, is it? What Tiote did was a cautionable offence by both the laws of the game and the definition of word "dissent". I even posted both of them above. Common sense is completely fucking irrelevant. Howard Webb, and every other referee works from this: http://www.thefa.com/thefa/rulesandregulations/~/media/Files/PDF/the-fa-2012-13/fifa-laws-of-the-game-2012-13.ashx Now you can debate his performance in relation to other incidents all you like (But I'd still suggest cross-referencing with the above, for clarity), but in relation to this decision he got it absolutely right. However there is someone to blame for Tiote's booking. Sadly, it's Tiote.