After a hard morning on the training ground - most of which was spent picking bits of chicken from his teeth - Stephen Roger Bruce retreated to the canteen to indulge in his favourite dinnertime meal...
But oh no! What's this? That evil swine Michael James Wallace Ashley intervened and ordered that butter be taken off the menu! "What? M-m-m-marger? Magar-what? Margarine?" said Stephen Roger Bruce, his voice beginning to crack.
As a solitary tear rolled down his cheek, Stephen Roger Bruce walked back to his office.
Good luck, Stephen Roger Bruce, good luck.