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Jonás Gutiérrez (now managing Club Almagro)


Crumpy Gunt

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Guest Howaythetoon

Has there been a more frustrating player than Jonas at United in recent years?

 

Robert because you knew exactly what he could be capable of?

 

Robert was frustrating but often delivered. Jonas often threatens to but often doesn't. He can beat a man for fun, carry the ball for fun and generally work his bollocks off for fun but when it comes to crossing, passing, shooting, scoring, creating goals...

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I still think Ben Arfa would be better in a position where him roaming (which let's face it he'll do anyway) doesn't affect the shape if we lose the ball - which is likely to happen a lot with a player like him in the team trying things.

 

                          Harper

Simpson Williamson* Coloccini Enrique

       Barton Nolan Tiote Gutierrez

                              Ben Arfa

                      Carroll

 

*Or Taylor

 

Either way, I f***ing hope we get to see it before the season is out. :fwap:

I'll join you in a :fwap:

 

I'm on for this  :fwap: as well. Where and when?

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Yeah just put out an ad on craigslist. "Are you a straight guy who loves newcastle united?  Want to jack off with another straight guy over a potential starting XI? Hit me up.  No gay shit, just two dudes with their dicks out.  Let's touch them and see what happens.  I stress, no homo."

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Yeah just put out an ad on craigslist. "Are you a straight guy who loves newcastle united?  Want to jack off with another straight guy over a potential starting XI? Hit me up.  No gay shit, just two dudes with their dicks out.  Let's touch them and see what happens.  I stress, no homo."

 

Sounds like you've done this before.

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Yeah just put out an ad on craigslist. "Are you a straight guy who loves newcastle united?  Want to jack off with another straight guy over a potential starting XI? Hit me up.  No gay s***, just two dudes with their dicks out.  Let's touch them and see what happens.  I stress, no homo."

 

Three dudes btw.

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There's a cloning experiment that would be worth while, a Robert/Jonas blend

 

Combine that with a Bernard/Enrique blend and wow.

 

Though knowing us we'll end up with a lazy winger who can't kick a ball and an injury-prone left-back who's naive defensively and not great going forward.

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Who would you replace at CM?

 

Even after today I would replace Nolan if we could get somebody who brought more to our game.  I know getting somebody to score the goals he gets is almost impossible.  I just think we could do with somebody who does more over 90 minutes and Nolan has probably only got 2 more seasons left after this one.

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There's a cloning experiment that would be worth while, a Robert/Jonas blend

 

Combine that with a Bernard/Enrique blend and wow.

 

Though knowing us we'll end up with a lazy winger who can't kick a ball and an injury-prone left-back who's naive defensively and not great going forward.

:lol: aye to true and we'd give him a 5 year deal

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Yeah just put out an ad on craigslist. "Are you a straight guy who loves newcastle united?  Want to jack off with another straight guy over a potential starting XI? Hit me up.  No gay shit, just two dudes with their dicks out.  Let's touch them and see what happens.  I stress, no homo."

 

Sounds like you've done this before.

You read enough of them on craigslist and you can write them in your sleep.

 

 

http://i.imgur.com/Qi0xJ.png

seriousjobros.com has a ton of them and they're all ridiculous.  "let's jack off BUT NO GAY SHIT"

 

 

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He gets right on my fucking wick. I honestly can't enjoy or appreciate the performances of an attacking player who can't use the ball. He's just not a footballer. If he could swap brains with Sheringham he'd be alreet.

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He gets right on my f***ing wick. I honestly can't enjoy or appreciate the performances of an attacking player who can't use the ball. He's just not a footballer. If he could swap brains with Sheringham he'd be alreet.

 

Yep. It seems a little hypocritical to me that Allardyce's style is (rightfully) despised on here, yet Jonas is pretty much adored. He's a functional player, there to win free kicks and waste time.

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