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Chelsea 2 - 2 Newcastle United - 15/05/11 - post match reaction from page 30


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Guest ObiChrisKenobi

Only caught the last fifteen or so. What happened to Ferguson? Bad injury/precautionary/not even an injury?

 

He had a mild moment of delirium when he suddenly realised he was a Leftback and not a Winger. So he subbed himself.

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Only caught the last fifteen or so. What happened to Ferguson? Bad injury/precautionary/not even an injury?

 

Just pulled up with nobody near him, looked like a hamstring.

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Krul - 6

 

Simpson - 6

Taylor - 8

Colo - 9

Enrique - 9 - MOTM

 

Lovenkrands - 6

Barton - 6.5

R.Taylor - 7

Ferguson - 7

 

Ameobi - 5

Jonas - 7

 

Subs (for effort):

Ranger - 7

LuaLua - 7

Ameobi mk II - 7

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Only caught the last fifteen or so. What happened to Ferguson? Bad injury/precautionary/not even an injury?

 

He had a mild moment of delirium when he suddenly realised he was a Leftback and not a Winger. So he subbed himself.

 

:lol: Oh you.

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Brilliant result!

 

Krul 5.5 - huge huge error on the second goal

 

Simpson 5.5 - needs to change his boots and stop backing off

Coloccini 8.5 - superb

S.Taylor 9 - as above but got the goal

Enrique 7 - grew into the game

 

Barton 8 - impressive

Ferguson 7 - had lumps kicked out of him but did brilliantly

R.Taylor 6.5 - not as bad as feared

Gutierrez 7 - great goal... good outlet as usual

 

Lovenkrands 5 - ran about like a blue arsed fly bit did little of note

Sh Ameobi 6 - mixed bag, one or two amazing bits of skill to skin players

 

Subs:

LuaLua 6 - didn't look fit, one great cross that lead to corner for late goal

Ranger 6 - assist

Sa Ameobi 6 - one class run, gets marks for basically being an Ameobi

 

 

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Almost missed the Golden Corral Soccer Celebration: Help Yourself to Happiness award. Just caught it in time. It seems to have been awarded to anyone who celebrated anything this weekend.

 

http://imageshack.us/m/716/6446/20110515at104206.jpg

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Guest ObiChrisKenobi

Almost missed the Golden Corral Soccer Celebration: Help Yourself to Happiness award. Just caught it in time. It seems to have been awarded to anyone who celebrated anything this weekend.

 

http://imageshack.us/m/716/6446/20110515at104206.jpg

 

:lol:

 

Man, there's a golden chance for random made up award MEMEs here.

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US MARINES MAN OF THE MATCH : Didier Drogba ???

 

:lol:

 

Ryan Taylor got the Touch of Gray Winning Touch of the Game though, I think they meant Saylor though.  :lol:

 

Wait, that's actually a real award?  :lol:

 

Aren't you jealous of those guys with the perfect mix of gray and their natural hair color? Well, now with Touch of Gray, you don't have to be!

 

And you can make pancakes for bitches that want milk, yo.

 

After you get in that ass.

 

You sexy salt and pepper bastard.

 

What the hell, Mike?  :lol:

 

There is a Just for Men commercial where some milf is at the door asking for milk. Old dude doesn't have shit, but he wants to break the ice with the girl, so he jumps out of the window of his apartment onto several moving vehicles to run to the supermarket.

 

When he arrives, he's like "I look like an old bastard. I need some Just for Men." "Oh, and milk."

 

So he gets all this shit, presumably scales the wall of his building and start washing the grey away, all the while the woman is still standing outside the fucking door. Has to have been an hour at this point.

 

So then he's done, grey away and he's ready to bang. They never show him brushing that paint on his balls, but it's left to the audience to assume.

 

So he opens the door with the warm ass milk he forgot to put in the fridge and he's like " :naughty: Anything else?" and she's all horny and she says "How about some pancakes?" Pancakes of course, being a clumsy daytime television euphemism for "How about some pussy?"

 

It's a decent ad.

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Almost missed the Golden Corral Soccer Celebration: Help Yourself to Happiness award. Just caught it in time. It seems to have been awarded to anyone who celebrated anything this weekend.

 

http://imageshack.us/m/716/6446/20110515at104206.jpg

 

:mackems:

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Is Merson after a coaching job up here or something? He's been licking NUFC arse all day.

 

He's often got good things to say about us, tbf

 

He usually says it how it is, but with added crack for mental effect.

 

 

 

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:lol: Fucking America, man

 

Fuck you! You know what it would be like if I could win the Golden Corral Soccer Celebration Help Yourself to Happiness award?

 

I could write my own fucking ticket!

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Guest ObiChrisKenobi

US MARINES MAN OF THE MATCH : Didier Drogba ???

 

:lol:

 

Ryan Taylor got the Touch of Gray Winning Touch of the Game though, I think they meant Saylor though.  :lol:

 

Wait, that's actually a real award?  :lol:

 

Aren't you jealous of those guys with the perfect mix of gray and their natural hair color? Well, now with Touch of Gray, you don't have to be!

 

And you can make pancakes for bitches that want milk, yo.

 

After you get in that ass.

 

You sexy salt and pepper bastard.

 

What the hell, Mike?  :lol:

 

There is a Just for Men commercial where some milf is at the door asking for milk. Old dude doesn't have shit, but he wants to break the ice with the girl, so he jumps out of the window of his apartment onto several moving vehicles to run to the supermarket.

 

When he arrives, he's like "I look like an old bastard. I need some Just for Men." "Oh, and milk."

 

So he gets all this shit, presumably scales the wall of his building and start washing the grey away, all the while the woman is still standing outside the fucking door. Has to have been an hour at this point.

 

So then he's done, grey away and he's ready to bang. They never show him brushing that paint on his balls, but it's left to the audience to assume.

 

So he opens the door with the warm ass milk he forgot to put in the fridge and he's like " :naughty: Anything else?" and she's all horny and she says "How about some pancakes?" Pancakes of course, being a clumsy daytime television euphemism for "How about some pussy?"

 

It's a decent ad.

 

;D ;D

 

Mike should do audio description for the partially sighted.

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Is Merson after a coaching job up here or something? He's been licking NUFC arse all day.

 

He's often got good things to say about us, tbf

 

Apart from trying to sell our best players.

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US MARINES MAN OF THE MATCH : Didier Drogba ???

 

:lol:

 

Ryan Taylor got the Touch of Gray Winning Touch of the Game though, I think they meant Saylor though.  :lol:

 

Wait, that's actually a real award?  :lol:

 

Aren't you jealous of those guys with the perfect mix of gray and their natural hair color? Well, now with Touch of Gray, you don't have to be!

 

And you can make pancakes for bitches that want milk, yo.

 

After you get in that ass.

 

You sexy salt and pepper bastard.

 

What the hell, Mike?  :lol:

 

There is a Just for Men commercial where some milf is at the door asking for milk. Old dude doesn't have shit, but he wants to break the ice with the girl, so he jumps out of the window of his apartment onto several moving vehicles to run to the supermarket.

 

When he arrives, he's like "I look like an old bastard. I need some Just for Men." "Oh, and milk."

 

So he gets all this shit, presumably scales the wall of his building and start washing the grey away, all the while the woman is still standing outside the fucking door. Has to have been an hour at this point.

 

So then he's done, grey away and he's ready to bang. They never show him brushing that paint on his balls, but it's left to the audience to assume.

 

So he opens the door with the warm ass milk he forgot to put in the fridge and he's like " :naughty: Anything else?" and she's all horny and she says "How about some pancakes?" Pancakes of course, being a clumsy daytime television euphemism for "How about some pussy?"

 

It's a decent ad.

 

There was a kid at my old high school who always used to say "I want some pancakes...and pussy." Pretty sure he's been arrested twice since graduation.

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US MARINES MAN OF THE MATCH : Didier Drogba ???

 

:lol:

 

Ryan Taylor got the Touch of Gray Winning Touch of the Game though, I think they meant Saylor though.  :lol:

 

Wait, that's actually a real award?  :lol:

 

Aren't you jealous of those guys with the perfect mix of gray and their natural hair color? Well, now with Touch of Gray, you don't have to be!

 

And you can make pancakes for bitches that want milk, yo.

 

After you get in that ass.

 

You sexy salt and pepper bastard.

 

What the hell, Mike?  :lol:

 

 

Whoa, that isn't touch of gray, c'mon.

 

:lol: Yeah, but those are awful. The schizo guy on the couch, and shit. Fuck those.

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Guest BlacknWhiteArmy

Krul- 5- Fine but a big mistake for the goal which he has been doing all season.

Simpson- 6- Lots of falling over- ok.

Taylor- 9- Superb. Great defensive display and goal.

Coloccini-8-Strong

Enrique-9- MOTM.

Lovenkrands-6-Wasn't that bad actually. Lots of tracking back, won the free kick for our first goal.

Raylor- 6- Fine.

Barton-8- Captains performance

Jonas-7- Strong running and a good display

Ferguson-7-Looks canny.

Ameobi- 5- Poor.

 

Lua Lua- 6- Didn't do very much running, well done for the goal though.

Ranger-6-Buzzed about a bit

Ameobi-6- Got a bit of pace about him.

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Krul 5.5: Good and bad. Slipped up for the goal.

 

Simpson 5.75: Still the weakest link in defence. If he were Russian he'd be called Dani Backsoffalot.

Saylor 8: Strong at the back, dangeresque in the oppo box. He can still fuck off with the Captain Fantastic bollocks.

Colo 8: Immense. Read everything, killed everything.

Enrique 8: One slip up for the FK, but ruled as per.

 

Lovenkrands 5.5: Tries.

Raylor 5: Ugly and shit.

Barton 6: Faded in and out. Came into it in the second and wound up Lampard which is nice.

Ferguson 7: Great display. Real confidence and energy allied to pace and tekkas.

 

Jonas 7: Worked hard. Great bum use for his goal.

Ameobi 6: The odd good touch, but usual Shola performance in the main.

 

Subs: Great work from them all, tbh. Seemed to inject us with confidence and fizz just when we needed it. Especially noteworthy: Ranger's header for the goal.

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