BlueStar

Funnily enough, aside from racist 70s sitcoms and modern day ijnternet mackems I don't think I've heard someone described as a "spear-chucker".

> Mag at work comes through the door "Honey, ahm hurm!" *Whoops and applause* "Put the telly on pet, ah cannit wait to see the Barcelurna of the North beat Man U the neet, reckon it'll be a waak awa." > Cuts to 3-0 Man U scoreline and M.A.W with head in hands. Flower on windowsill wilts SFX: SLIDE WHISTLE

So we've got a pact with the devil which keeps Best scoring, we've infiltrated EA to unfairly inflate our player ratings in video games so that players think we're a better team than we are and are more likely to join us, we control the local, national, TV and print media, we have referees in our pocket, Sunderland players and managers deliberately fail because they're closeted Newcastle fans, outside of football we use our influence to get Toon fans on to adverts, keep the Tyneside propaganda going with unfairly excessive coverage of things like the Great North Run... This is beyond the usual football related bitterness, do the denizens of RTG get changed in the cupboard because they think Mags are spying on them through a camera in that round hole in the light fitting? I guess the conspiracy theories and superstitions are easier than admitting that maybe their team isn't as amazing as they thought and our players aren't all as Championship level as they've imagined...

And become immortalised as a footy trivia answer for all time

Give Beefy a lifetime supply of Balti pies in exchange for tattooing SportsDirect.com on his gut?

You should have stayed at a big club, stayed at a biiig club, you should have stayed at a big club...

@OptaJoe: "8 - Sergio Aguero has become only the 2nd player to score eight times in his first five Premier League games (after Mick Quinn).

Hooray, Smalling gets me a goal! Good job as well, before that I'd done the old trick of having far more points on the bench than on the pitch.

He'd be a perfect fit for us, funnily enough, hates spending money and loves developing unknown French teenagers.

Great to have a local player we can be proud of getting behind. ie as opposed to Carroll, who we had to cheer on in the knowledge that he was a dick.

Shola "positionally astute" He has no fucking clue where he is or where anyone else is, he's offside all the fucking time. Shola was born offside man. Sammi already shows more of a footballing brain than Shola, Nile Ranger has a better footballing brain than Shola man.

Good practise for if he comes here then.

Hopefully that means a trip to the glue factory.

Mate of mine took that photo

How come this embeds fine when I quote it here, but not in the games forum?

Such a classy club, handballing off the line and running right across the pitch to lie to the linesman, stamping on people's kidneys, horror tackles from Cattermole, a chariman who gets Irish police to 'lose' his breath test results, a manager who calls the fans twats, a half empty stadium that leaks raw sewage onto the visiting champions, songs about Bobby Robson pissing himself, smashing up their own bus stops when we beat them 4-1, a credit to the game.

If he keeps giving the ball away we might keep him in January.

Sammy did more in his 2 minute cameo than Shola did for his entire lolloping shift.

Not entirely sure how much of it was QPR being OK and how much of it was us being shit. No-one's really played this QPR side before, Wigan, Everton and Bolton got away with playing them as a Championship club.

So why not sell him during the transfer window and buy a replacement?

If Sammy scores, we're through the screen

http://1.2.3.9/bmi/images.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/9940854.jpg

http://images.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/9939204.jpg

Just put £10,000 on Black Berry shares because it seems a sound investment.

Of course