Elric

Cissé scoring literally killed the Al Jazeera stream I was watching

Gouff

Walcott scores, too. Maybe not going quite as badly as I had imagined

Debuchy assist, Cabaye goal

There's no fucking way Remy should be up on his own, ever, when playing against 9 men. Pile forward you cunts!

Time to get the goal difference up, no mercy.

And there goes the Szczęsny clean sheet. What a fucking trainwreck of a day

Clean sheets gone for Coleman, Distin and now Debuchy, you fucking cunts.

Fuck's sake man, Osama bin Howard. Clean sheet killed

Merry fucking Christmas for the 2 points, Welbeck... Kid n' Play looking motherfucker.

Ooof, unlucky.

Need Welbeck to get his rape gloves on now like. Goals plzz.

3 minutes

Demichelis

Stuck Coleman and Distin in for the next games, hoping S*nderland continue their miserable away scoring record. Benched Negredo, start with Suarez© and Welbeck up front (if Welbeck is fit). Whacked Debuchy in as well actually, probably about a 16 point deduction this week Need to make up some serious ground to have any hope of finishing in the upper echelons of our work league, though.

Lerl. Hope this goes as well as I expect it to

WILL NO-ONE KEEP A CLEAN SHEET

Looked like an advert for one of those fucking Just Dance games

Needs to decapitate Adebayor and take his quickening. Then he might be a 1-in-3 striker.

Someone make a pic of him with some bling on and stuff. OG Hooiveld. Make it happen.

http://i.imgur.com/ueJEDYo.jpg

Probably because he's lazy as fuck, for the most part.

Well, there goes the Southampton clean sheet