Chicane

hahahahahaha

christ hope he's alright

jesus Alnwick

feck

Ayoze

No chance this game ends with 22 players on the field

Bit nervous seeing Alnwick come for the ball there

Bloody hell Dummett

Let's go

'Sammy Ameobi, winger' 'That's debateable'

Well that's that for another year then, season over.

Hadron ColEidur Gudjohnsen is brilliant Might be mentioned elsewhere but there is a good article in The Blizzard this month from George Caulkin on Newcastle and Mike Ashley (as well as some others about football in the North-East)

Maybe he's injured?

Gouffran is literally the perfect Pardew player, or at least, has been 100% Pardewed since coming here. Offers absolutely nothing of note going forward, doesn't take any risks, runs around a lot protecting the full-back and keeps the team's defensive shape solid-ish which is Pardew's number one priority: keep it tight and try to nick one at the other end with a bit of 'magic'. That's literally his entire outlook on football.

They should get rid of the dinosaurs too while they're at it

Mehdi Abeid is f*****g injured

Isn't that Mourinho's whole philosophy? Pretty sure he's said those words almost exactly before. Pards probably heard him say it and decided to repeat it.

Pretty sure De Jong signed a six-year contract as well http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/28121735

Not to be a Debbie Downer but he's not gonna be here long is he

Colback's brother isn't very good at crossing

gooooal

Callum Roberts

That's a hell of a beard on Alnwick

Adam Campbell is so small