Nucasol

Bale tearing it up in the semi-pro leagues.

Nope. Along with the third kit (nearly 6 weeks now…) and away kit. I’m hopeful they’ll turn up by the start of the World Cup break.

It’s taken a Mitro-esque redemption arc to get him there and he’ll need to do it in the PL this season to take him out the Chopra / Nugent / Gayle pool of ‘too good / not good enough’ players.

Didn’t Eddie sign Solanke and Ibe for Bournemouth? Unless he feels burned by that experience I’d say this one would be right up his strasse.

There’s only one Laybuy Virtual.

Gotham Town?

Weapons grade noncer whoever created that.

Programme Pete.

Gvardiol to Chelsea I reckon, £20m less than Fofana.

Guaranteed, the absolute throbber of a bloke.

Waugh is the journalist equivalent of the SlowSportsNews Twitter account.

Edwards stood tail in palm ready to make your nightmare a reality…

Great signing. Sorts the colossal gap created by Eriksen leaving.

That’s Nice for him.

Emptied his nuts frapping over the lasses Euros. Lad is pure chill now.

Michael Take or Mickey Taker to his pals.

A bit like Man City they have a stockpile of youngsters they can sell for a few million quid a go to help the coffers. Last year it was Tomori, this year maybe Hudson-Odoi or Loftus-Cheek.

In the squad according to their official site: https://www.lcfc.com/match/76047#squads

Great list. Forgot a few of these - Crespo being one. To be fair, I think Piguain must have ate his way around London given how he waddled round the pitch.

Shevchenko, Torres, Kezman - the list of prolific strikers joining Chelsea and going to shit is extensive.

Chat was one or the other, not both.

If Fofana goes it might scupper any Maddison deal. Sure I read something earlier saying it was one of the two, not both.

Looking through his tweets, he’s the biggest Tory example of white male fragility you could ever find.