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Alan Pardew is delighted to finally have the appreciation of Bafetimbi Gomis over the line.  In a rare article the usually media shy Newcastle boss spoke frankly of his relief.

 

'Frankly I'm relieved' said Pardew 'I've been hoping he was going to appreciate us for some time and now that's it's finally happened I can say that this one is for the fans.' 

 

When questioned on whether he intended to strengthen his playing staff the Newcastle supremo was more forthright 'Listen this is the media all over, constantly looking for the negative angle, let's just enjoy the appreciation of Gomis for a few days and we will take stock after that.  You need to realise that appreciation is not free, you all assume that, but it isn't and it can be really expensive if the appreciation lasts a few days.'

 

When questioned about the impending signing of Colback he claimed to be in the dark 'I had a telephone conversation with a Sunderland official and after I explained that I was a busy man they asked if I would like a call back.  I said yes and now it looks as though we may be signing someone who has yet to formally appreciate us.  I'm livid and intend to throw the noggin in at the first opportunity' said the Toon boss who was quickly ushered away by Sports Direct officials in unsellable leisure wear.

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In other news, man murders thread with s**** reporting parody.

 

SHOTS FIRED!!

 

Blue on blue action as well, possibly PTSD (Part Time Sports Direct) related

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He was, that's why he had. to go for who Wise, Jimenez, Vetere, etc. wanted. :yao:

 

Vetere and Jimenez, man. A who's who of who-the-fuck. Did those two work at the top level in football again? Or before?

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FROM DONCASTER: :meh:

Doncaster's not that bad, there are a couple of nice little pubs with some good grub round there. Go to the Olive tree, or down to Sandtoff where The Raindeer is. cracking food there as well.

 

 

 

 

:)

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