greydos

‘M’lud I refer the court to exhibit A - the floated set penis chart. The defense also calls Mike Williamson to the stand...’ No successful Defence ever calls on Mike Williamson!

Lascelles doing his “ghost of Steven Taylor past” impression was what killed us. Shocking defending. Step out and block the man. At least show him the outside and make him dribble towards touch.

“The Magpie Group” needs to go back in the title of this thread, for those causal visitors/guests who wander along and don’t know what “TMG” means. The group needs awareness and publication at all times in all mediums

I was at the game on that side of the pitch. This is right

My intake of breath was so sharp reading those first 2 paragraphs I nearly choked to death!

Ritchie for me. Best composure when given a clear sight of goal in the box.

In the 13 games he was here Townsend recorded 4 goals and 2 assists. Across a season that's just under 12 goals and 6 assists. Ritchie this year in the PL with 35 games recorded 3 goals and 5 assists. Admittedly, he probably would've had more of each with the bad luck of the few times he's hit the frame of the goal and our strikers being donkeys when the ball is presented on a plate. Still, I'd probably go with the view that under Rafa, Townsend is probably a bit of an upgrade. Or, in Townsend’s purple patch for the season he managed 1 more goal than Ritchie and 3 fewer assists. Just saying Townsend may have an unproductive 2/3 of a year and his numbers might turn out similar.

Love your use of “that” I agree wholeheartedly. Keep Ritchie. In an ideal world sell Atsu, get Kennedy and one more in

The big problem for me in swapping Ritchie for Townsend is that Ritchie’s a decent and reliable finisher in the box. Man U and Arsenal at home 2 important examples. Townsend seems to be more like Kieron Dyer with his inside the box finishing, not composed and very hit and miss. Outside the box he can dig like but still we need to guarantee the few clear cut openings we create in the box are buried and Ritchie does that better in my view.

After years of criminal under-investment in our squad Ashley’s trying to get out of jail with a Plea bargain!

Never a penalty. Poor decision. Even worse analysis from commentators. If England went out of the World Cup to a similar decision there would be hell to pay in the media.

I’m at my first game of the season. Woop woop!!! 3-1

Aren’t you meant to be “Optimistic”, Nut?

He just needs what the Tour de France riders use

So childish. Fine all is well carry on nothing to see here.

As if improving your core strength makes you bigger. Fact is in many on the floor challenges our players are weak - go in for the tackle and come off second best so often. Our players are always getting “eased” off the ball. Lascelles times tackles well but very rarely does he out-strength a forward with his body before winning a header. It’s the core and leg strength for positioning much of our team lacks. Shielding the ball, which relies on leg and core strength, our team is weak. Watching Watford v Arsenal at the start of the season showed me how much stronger premier league players are in core strength compared with championship; watford’s Team has dtronger players than ours. And is it hell a criticism of Lascelles and lejeune, just an area they can improve. Same goes for Merino and Hayden. It’s a bit of strength in on the floor challenges that is making Diame seem a bit of a revelation in the last few weeks. Almost an old school strength all Midfielder’s used to have, which Viera, Keane, Petit, Ince etc used to have in spades.

He’s not strong enough yet for a cb - shouldn’t be getting pushed over by Lukaku I don’t care how big Lukaku is. It’s a problem for me in midfield as well; so often we’re physically weaker than the opposition: Hayden, Lejeune even Lascelles needs to improve their core and leg strength then grow some shoulders.

This is from the club shop name printing service on the site at the moment - http://i66.tinypic.com/bdjjiv.png Still has Atsu at 30.. £4 per digit? f*** off. Yikes. I know - I know girls who let you fist them for a quarter of that. This whole expensive digits thing, it's £4 per number and a maximum of 2 numbers so £8 total. It's expensive but it's not extortionate - or am I missing something?

In 5 years, maybe less, I'll have forgotten he played for us.

That is not James Corden.

He's the kind of player who can get a ball under control in the final third, whether by finding a pocket of space or back to goal lower body strength. We've had a year of Diame and Perez being powderpuff up there. He'd lay it off for decent wingers and we'd advance up the pitch. Plus he could get 12 goals with Shelvey feeding him early bullets quite comfortably.

It maybe a pipe dream etc etc, but would anyone take Rooney as the 10 for 2 seasons?

No buts, Colback is dreadful; far worse than Sissoko. Like Colback would ever get in the France teams or manage to con a top 3 side to buy him for £30m. Colback has never, ever, commanded a transfer fee.

I'm not his biggest fan, but Joe Hart would be ideal.