Ronaldo

This. He'll honestly be here until the end of his career and I hope that he is. He'll always remain anywhere from the 2nd-4th choice though I hope. Oh good, I can only imagine Shola's mobility at 33. Nothing symbolizes the club's downfall better than the talentless waste of space.

Yes, it gets better!! Howay Shola, get your fountain pen out. Eh? I'm not selling it to you.

Last year with my season ticket if true. I won't be the only one either.

Hooper's not a PL player.

Nah, no way he did as much damage as Souness.

In a room full of betting gays, I'm the last one standing. Someone has to fly that flag.

Pav won me £233 with his last kick for Spurs in May.

Sicko was fibbing.

Keirrison you mean?

"How long is your contract for?" "None of your fucking business."

"Which one is Simon Bird?" Shocking memory.

Who should be there instead?

Course he's a cunt.

Sunderland fan, as is Caulkin (according to Douglas). That's odd. I swear I heard someone say during the Kinnear rant video that Bird was a lifelong Newcastle fan.

Clueless.

Holt's the worst of the worst, like. As pretentious as they come.

Seems to think he'll be playing on Sat.

Said that Barton doesn't have the quality for a top 5 side. Truth hurts.

An influx of signings?

Thick as pig shite.

Every keeper in the world has been referred to as a good shot stopper. It's the easiest aspect of keeping. Rob Green is an average shot stopper and a subaverage keeper.

Won them the FA Cup last year? Has put them in a position to challenge for the league. Deserves another season (unless it does tits up early). I didn't say he, or even that style of footy, wasn't successful. All I'm saying is that if my team had spent £500 mil on players and deployed 'safety' first tactics, I'd be getting awfully frustrated. Especially considering the potential of the squad available. Awfully frustrated with an FA cup and 3rd place? Right.

Krul did pretty well at the end of last season, and Forster looked a bit dodgy for Celtic in their last 6 games or so. Factor in pre-season, and you have your answer.

Harper would have stood still, picked it out of the net, and kicked it angrily with a red face.