Chris_R

It's back. Just in time to watch us build another attack.

My stream's just died.

He sets up for a 0-0 and we go behind within 3 minutes what does he do now? http://www.nufc.co.uk/javaImages/ca/a2/0,,10278~9020106,00.jpg

Well, our "Defend for 90 minutes" ploy is in ruins already. Fuck off Pardew, you cunt.

I just hope the fans pelt him with s*** for 90 minutes. After all, he's served up enough of it to us over the past couple of years.

Says so much about the man. It really does. He's an abject coward, so terrified of attacking teams and incapable of utilising the players at his disposal.

Elliot; Debuchy, S Taylor, Yanga-Mbiwa, Haidara; Perch, Tiote, Cabaye ©; Sissoko, Cisse, Gutierrez Subs Harper, Williamson, Gosling, Anita, Ben Arfa, Gouffran, Shola Ameobi Positives: Cabaye plays further up the pitch Negatives: STILL two f***ing defensive midfielders. Cowardly tosser. Gouffran dropped for Jonas. Baffling. Jonas is a winger, well of sorts. So he'll offer nothing as an auxillary forward which is what this position should be. Sissoko is not a winger OR a forward, yet he's playing wide right. Again. Why? Should have had Sissoko next to Cabaye as one of TWO forward central midfielders, Gouffran left and HBA right with one of Perch or Tiote dropped. Even if Hatem can only manage 60 minutes, (Which as a minimum he should be able to) he should start. Or Sissoko as DMC and play Anita and Cabaye in the middle further forward. Absolute bag of w*** from that cowardly fraud.

When he's not in charge of our club anymore, he's not worth mentioning anymore. Until then, I'll lambast him continually and repeatadly at every available juncture.

See this is the major problem, in my eyes. At no point does he seem to consider that our (well, his) tactics are horrible and ineffective, irrespective of the personnel available to attempt to implement them. If he admitted he was approaching things incorrectly, there'd be hope of improvement. But he doesn't, so we'll get no better while he's here. If that cunt had the Barcelona squad, he'd still only commit 3 men to attack and hump long balls up to Messi. Then blame the pitch, local carnivals, Europe and a lack of magic for his team being well down the league, but he'd reflect that because he was just 3 points off Levante who'd had a great season, all was well. Utter tossbasket.

He's trying to drag our expectations down to his level of competency, since he's fast realising he cannot step up to the job in its current form.

I think "Sack the fraud" could be sung with considerable gusto. Certainly gets the feelings over.

I would say there's literally no chance whatsoever of that happening. That does fascinate. The thought of Pardew having full control of transfers, I would think we would actually be higher in the league than we are now. In terms of style .. Well it would be no worse than the s*** he dishes out right now. He would sign the right players for his route one bore fest . Sort of mid table mediocrity at best but in a better place than where we are now. But our player would be worth next to nothing in market value and the results would worsen over time as well because route one football isn't hard to counter act. Look at Stoke this season and West Ham gradually declining as the season has wore on. Yes it would be damaging in the long run, but I was thinking perversely , we would probably be higher in the league than we are now if only by just a few places. Strange but probrable. Not that I would want him to be in control of transfers. f*** me that gives me the shivers. The man that preferred Mullins over mascherano, and harewood over tevez. Agree with all of what you say, we probably would be a bit higher in the league simply because he'd have the players to suit his horrid style rather than attempting to impose that style on actual real footballers. It's so sad.

That seems pretty spot on to me. The problem is, something has to give. My hope is that we replace Pardew with someone who can adequately use the talented squad we have. My fear is that we get rid of Carr and hand Pardew control of the transfers. Which would be the biggest mistake this club could ever possibly make.

Yeah, but to be fair Redknapp's only going to have a chance to be sacked as a Premiership manager for a few more hours.

I'm pretty convinced it's going to be judged as 'rubbish'. He's basically saying there that because West Ham and Southampton have had good seasons (by staying up), if we catch them, by default we must have done well too. Astonishing really. The most bizarre logic. Was typing this earlier on but got sidetracked. Norwich, Southampton, Swansea and West Ham appear to be the benchmark Whereas we seem to be the skidmark.

Ironically, if we attacked with more purpose we'd look better at the back.

They're probably jetlagged from thinking about travelling too.

Just looking back to page 1 as we're not far off thread #3 for Pardizzle. This guy knew. Ha, it seems I did. Not that I take any pleasure in it, I'd trade that foresight in a heartbeat for some decent attacking football.

I would hunt down and kill Pardew if that happened. Sadly, I think it's entirely possible that he's mad enough to attempt such a thing.

Cisse can play perfectly well as a lone striker. He just struggles as the only fucking attacker. There's a massive difference.

18) Given that there's some truth in our alleged moves to bring the giant Andy Carroll back to Newcastle, and accepting the statistical proof that we already play more long balls than any other team in the league, how much can we expect the quality of football to improve next season? That's it, I'm done. For tonight.

16) Rate your own performance as manager of Newcastle United this season on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the best. 17) Given the opportunity to play through this season again, what things that were within your control would you do differently?

Love this. Yeah, I got bored of forced civility by number 10. I'll add a couple more though: 11) In your first full season with us we finished 5th last year with a team largely recruited by the excellent Graham Carr. What part did you play in them achieving this and how do you feel your coaching and tactics have improved those players this campaign, now that you've had time to get them to play the way you want them to? 12) You said in the press that the reaction to the Sunderland result was hysterical. What would have been a proportionate response to the turgid, cowardly, horrid display that our team full of international players put out at home to our local rivals? 13) Modern football regularly requires teams at all levels to play two games a week. Why do you feel that Newcastle United are uniquely not equiped to do this and who do you think is to blame for that? 14) You've said that you'll accept any finishing position this season just to get over the line. As manager of Newcastle United, what finishing position would you feel is low enough to count as gross managerial incompetence given the strength of our squad and those of the other teams in the league? 15) Given the size of this club and the strength of the playing staff, what should Newcastle fans realistically expect this team to be able to achieve in the league?

1) Why, given the quality of our offensive players, do we persist with worrying about what the opposition might do to us rather than making them worry about what we might do to them, especially given both the spectacular lack of success playing that way this season and how dreadful it is for supporters to watch? 2) Why do we rely on scoring goals from exceptional individual play and never commit more than 3 or 4 men to our attacks, when the only time this has ever worked in the past was with a forward triumverate of Ba on the left, Cisse central and Ben Arfa on the right, a setup that you spectacularly failed to recreate even once this season and a plan that you have persisted with even with the prolonged or permanent absence of 2/3s of that strike force? 3) Who is responsible for our players not being able to manage to start 30 games a season without being tired when Chelsea's seem to be managing 40-50, and what are you planning to do about this going forward? 4) Given that you play such a negative, containing game and put next to no focus on applying persistent pressure on the opposition, how do you intend to convince our more attack minded players that their footballing future lies with Newcastle United? 5) Why is Cabaye being deployed as a defensive midfielder next to Tiote when he is infinitely more effective further up the pitch? 6) Irrespective of when in the match it happens, every time we go a goal up we then seem to spend the rest of the game attempting to hold on to what we have rather than ever try to get a couple more. Why do you think this is the best approach? 7) I've noticed repeatedly that whenever we come out of a match with an unsatisfactory result, you talk in the press conferences afterwards about how we need to be more disciplined and have better shape, but you never mention that we should be attacking better or creating more chances. Why do you never consider the attacking deficiencies within our play when analysing our defeats? 8) What portion of coaching time is spent on attacking play vs defensive play, and how well do you think this is working? 9) "Attack is the best form of defence". Discuss. 10) For all the times that we've needed something on the pitch and Shola Ameobi has been the answer, what the merry fuck did you think the question was?

For the sake of my F5 key, can we just sack this cunt please?