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so, this is a joke, right?

Buffon Anyukov Mertesacker Puyol Zhirkov Xavi Senna Sneijder Ballack Arshavin Villa Coach: Guus Hiddink This team would fly the Turkish flag, despite the fact that I couldn't find any space to put actual Turkish players in

Probably more than one. By the way, can we all agree to always refer to him as "Alan fucking Smith" now?

Don't think it would be impossible if he moved somewhere like Hull.

Someone's made a comment to this effect before but... You look at players like Fabregas, Iniesta, Xabi, and Torres... And then you look at a player like Alan fucking Smith and think that they're playing the same sport... Just depressing.

A little bit of me inside dies every time I see a trophy ceremony at a major tournament. It's just that I can imagine how happy the people supporting the winning team must feel, and I know that neither the club nor the country I support are likely to win anything anytime soon. Sad :/

Germany never had a chance with Ballack at less than 100%. They're completely soulless without him.

watch him in the german league!! bit like saying benzema and anelka are crap based on this tournament. exactly what I expected him to be. Pretty good in a second-tier league, unproven (and now proven wanting) on a higher stage.

Germany completely outclassed. What a horrific tournament Gomez has had. This is the "world-class striker we have no hope of getting?"

dear oh dear. Can't see that working at all if it were to happen. Worth a laugh I suppose. Kind of feel sorry for both parties though.

Mackem. Didn't know the Mackems loved Cacapa so much.

has anyone made the "So he's signing for Spurs tomorrow morning?" joke yet?

mackems.gif mackems.gif Not all that difficult a standard to aspire to tbh.

Would be fairly chuffed with Batista. For some reason I just feel that he'll do well. It's like the diametric opposite of the feeling you'd get if we signed someone like Riise, who despite playing more games and arguably playing better for his club just has that aura of "potential big money flop" about him. Of course, all this is just me. In any case, he wasn't THAT bad at Arsenal.

It's Voetbal International that are saying it's been completed, I would guess subject to a medical. I'm more encouraged by an assortment of ITK's who are agreed that Gomes will be completed tomorrow or Saturday and, to quote one, "Robbo moving ever closer to Villa, could be done soon." yup, i'd be more encouraged by the schizophrenic ramblings of a bunch of anonymous internet saddos who spin s**** for the amusement of thick cretins, than i would be by reports from the oldest and most established football newspaper in the netherlands with a readership of almost a million a week. Anyone seen Glenn Roeder's rant at ITK dick heads? By God, I've just seen a truly profound quote from Glenn Roeder. That's like seeing a great Alan Smith goal.

I'd sign up to that tbf! Someone else in ahead of Alan Smith, yes. Piling all the expectation on a 16 year old, no. what if he's a total rooney-esque genius when he turns up? Then we won the lottery, but otherwise, I wouldn't expect to see him in the first team for another four~five years at least.

Best method available. What else are you going to do. And they're fantastic to watch as a neutral.

predictably, the quarter final match with the two "biggest" names is the dullest of the lot. I fully expect to see some crying Spaniards in about 20 minutes or so.

any bets on which Spaniard will choke during the shootout? judging by how knackered he looks, I think Villa just might...

Italy to win today and go on to win the tournament, nailed on

He's a perrenial loser though. Also the best international manager on the planet. That is a good point though, he's never actually won anything. Coming from a Korean, that ain't much of a surprise Hiddink = God It was the officials that got Korea through, not Hiddink. Never seen such cheating like it. I'm going to pre-empt myself from having an NE5-esque diatribe.

While I don't subscribe to the MaetihS school of thought, if he knocked us back in January he's certainly not going to want to come here now.

Been thinking exactly the same for the past hour. It's looking more and more like Italy is going to nick this Championships after going 0-0 and winning pens in the finals.

I've just realized that he's really bloomed under the tutelage of two managers I truly respect: Hiddink and Advocaat. I love this player more and more every minute

We had terms agreed with Zenit in January, he turned us down. That's off a magazine interview with one of his teammates by the way, not some ITK bollocks