bobbydazzla

Because our last two DoF hires have backfired spectacularly so you’d strongly suspect we wanted to take our time and let all the main characters who will have to work together have a good look at each other to try and minimise the chances of it going tits up again

Guinness for me at this time of year Kenneth

They decide what can or can’t happen on the huge swathes of grassy green grazing land close to St James Park where a shiny new stadium would fit perfectly

All of you pissy pants too scared to slag him off right now in case he comes good need to take off your nappies put on your big boy pants and live in the moment He’s been shite. Laugh about it. Live a little. Take that window of opportunity. You’ve been presented with a gift horse and you’re busy inspecting its molars for cavities. Whereas the rest of us are speeding round the field on our equine freebies and jumping over hedges. We might fall off, we might not. But we’re loving the ride.

I was a Freeman I’d sell all that land and then sit on my lazy arse somewhere luxurious where it’s sunny all year round drinking margaritas and smoking fat doobies until I shuffled off this mortal coil Fuck the cows

Is his ex-missus a 40 year old scorcher and if so, is she still single ? Asking for a friend

Aye, I thought that as I wrote it. But we couldn't slurp the delicious ice cold pints of Schadenfreude pilsner whilst he played for us, so it's a moot point

Let's just make hay whilst the sun shines He's been shite for club and country since he left here, drink in that sweet nectar. He might come good, he might not, we'll cross that river when we come to it, the future's not ours to see.

When people say to me: would you rather Isak was absolutely fucking shit or Wissa was a permacrock My answer's always the same, to me, they're mutually exclusive.

I think a poor run of results including a defeat, whilst the transfer window is open, just after an international break, would result in some posters spontaneously combusting

When it comes to the macro events that create the most insane and delusional posts on the forum, I rank them like this: 1) transfer windows 2) poor run of results (3 games or more) 3) international breaks 4) a defeat

It's Christmas dinner. Royal family... having a Christmas dinner. Camilla Parker-Bowles says, "Okay, we'll play 20 Questions. I'll think of something and you have to ask me questions and guess what it is." And what she's thinking of is Scholesy’s cock. So, Prince Philip goes, "Does it look like a Wotsit?" and she goes, "Yeah." Charles goes, "Is it something I can put in my mouth?", she goes, "Yeah." The Queen goes... "Is it Scholesy’s cock ?”

Palmer got a new contract and then has been shite since he signed on the dotted line Treat em mean, keep em keen

We’re like one big organism, one big animal. Yeah? The guys upstairs on the phone – they’re the mouth. The guys down here, the hands. And what part are you Alexander ? Good question. Probably the cunt

Say what you see:

Mainly weirdos on this forum and we all like to mass debate

Be lucky to get 20 league starts the cunt

Shock. Horror. Lies on Twatter. Here’s the truth for you

Meet the new boss, same as the old boss…

I’d rather he stayed shite but was absolutely fit

Is this the same German coach who would stand in the dugout sticking his finger in his arsehole and sniffing it ?