Pilko

I must say I almost creamed myself when Rooney floated one over David James against Pompey in the cup last season at Old Trafford. No, I'm not a Rooney fanboy, in fact I think the media have made him seem better than he really is. But WOW, what a goal.

I wouldn't say he's on 'very' high wages. He's certainly on less than Owen or Viduka.

Q: What would Peter Crouch be if he wasn't a footballer? A: A virgin.

Just skim-read some of rebel_yell's comments and he's pretty much spot on. I'd much rather we had Owen, Martins + another scoring 12-15 a season each than having one class striker scoring 30-odd a season. We all know what happens when you put all your eggs in one big-money basket.

The two key problems with our side are lack of pace and lack of height. Exceptions being Martins and N'Zogbia & Faye and Carroll.

I love nothing more when one of the four most hyped English footballers in this country does something wrong. Rooney, Terry, Gerrard and Lampard. Especially when it's Gerrard.

Did your scouts on Football Manager inform you of this? Dean Ashton should only be signed if other targets aren't available. Damn I miss how much I used to love Football Manager Your assistant manager Pilko thinks that Stephen927 is a very switched on poster and you should strive to keep him at the club.

Im just thinking, it wouldnt be much of a chase. A high-speed Carr Chase?

Bryan Ashton > Dean Ashton But seriously, Dean Ashton should only be signed as a last resort.

Ashley has shown f*** all yet. The fact that Ashley has been silent on the public front can be nothing but good in my opinion. Showing up in the away end means he is getting the fans on his side (although he hasn't fooled Crumpy Gunt yet) and his silence in the media is positive. Shepherd branding the women of this city as dogs or whatever just made the fans hate him, and blame him when things went wrong. Ashley's silence merely means he is trying to run the club in a quiet, efficient way. He also must be switched on enough to realize we get enough media attention without him giving interviews and risk drawing more criticism from the media hounds.

It makes for a great story today, but I'm sure they're very aware of what needs to be done. They'll probably keep Windass on, if only for the sentimentality, but as a backup I reckon.

Yeah, they seemgingly love loaning crap strikers... Aliadiere, Camara, Kepa, Bellion... not a great list!

Avram Grant isn't that clueless surely?

Obviously forgot to explain this to our squad.

Portugal, 8/1, Ladbrokes. Get on NOW! Got me a tenner on that and a tenner on Germany at 7/2. Also stuck a fiver on Mario Gomez top goalscorer. And I have Holland in the sweepstake at work.

Fat Sam to cringe everytime one of the two sides plays a pass to feet.

What time does this kick off? Might have a listen on fivelive.

This. Edgar should go on a 3-month loan to the Championship next season. one of the promoted clubs would make more sense, see what he's made of...they'd bite our hands off at a utility defender like him surely? doubt he'd get 1st team football at any of the clubs tbh This. Wonder if Carroll might get farmed out short-term to a promoted club? Stoke might want him instead of Shambles Ameobi.

This. Edgar should go on a 3-month loan to the Championship next season.

Yeah, Switzerland here we come!

If we don't sell Ameobi this should really be his last of chances - people said this season was his 'last chance' but he wasn't really played when he WAS fit, so it would be unfair to damn Shola due to the fact Allardyce sung his praises in the press then played Carroll ahead of him. I do think he should be given a more prominent role than he was given under Allardyce - and the fact that Premierleague teams are allowed to name seven subs should mean he'll be in and around the first "18" as it will now be without restricting the progress of Carroll too much.

Diatta Ramage Cacapa Rozehnal Smith Ameobi Duff N'Zogbia Emre

Aaron Ramsey to Everton apparently.

Given Beye Hughes Woodgate Bernard Solano Speed Lee Beardsley Shearer Asprilla

I am convinced that Crumpy Gunt is a Londonder being forced to support Newcastle by a gun-wielding psycopath, as he seems to enjoy no part of the matchday experience or generally being a fan of the club. In other news, people cheer the team onto the pitch.