Jill

Brentford, Bournemouth, Bristol City, Peterborough, Burton - £2 Chelsea v Newcastle, penalty missed - £2 free bet

Cheeky bastard tbh. Let's hope whoever comes in will see he's absolutely fucking useless and get rid asap. New guy all: Don't let the door hit your fat arse on the way out, John.

What the fuck.

Sounds about right. Once we concede the first, we'll fall to pieces.

GW 21 Sunderland 1-1 Liverpool Burnley 1-0 QPR Chelsea 2-0 Newcastle Everton 1-2 Man City Leicester 1-1 Aston Villa Swansea 1-0 West Ham West Brom 3-2 Hull Crystal Palace 0-1 Spurs Arsenal 2-1 Stoke Man Utd 2-1 Southampton

Oh yay we're talking about Gerrard again.

I knew I had without even looking, as I saw the scores come in. I need some sort of miracle in the second half of the season.

Unsurprising news.

Switched the TV on just in time to see Pardew's dial.

They fucking love a croquembouche on Masterchef Australia.

Some weird scores in that round.

6pm on BBC1. Just noticed this is coming up.

I'd forgotten I had Port Vale, Wycombe and Newport in a treble until they'd all been playing a while and when I checked only Wycombe were winning. It took a 90th minute Port Vale winner but the £5 returned £27.08 which should keep me going for a bit.

Nope.

Flag up. How late??

Has the analysis chap gone too?

I declare this a celebratory Double Decker.

I was out for a meal earlier and my auntie, who doesn't follow football, said there shouldn't be any non-Geordies involved with the club at all. I bit my lip so hard I drew blood.

Pardew's pressing F5 on here like the rest of us and waiting for page 700 before he signs.

Just get it signed, ffs.

I'd really struggle to make any positive comment about him. He seems to dive in stages and I thought Harper was slow.

Absolutely woeful.

Feel rough as fuck today, can't be arsed. Therefore we'll win 4-2.