Altamullan

Was just checking to see if he had ever played for Nice ( or had remarkable form against them) in desperate hope we may be on for a swap with HBA, when noticed he was signed by Lille from Bastia in 2013, doesn't appear to have played for them and was then loaned back to Bastia making 16 appearances and scoring 7 goals. He was then signed by Marseille (67 appearances, 13 goals). Does this mean the lad has form? Doesn't fancy the move, pick up the fee and then chuck the dummy.

I think he just might do it. Depends what Our Henri has looked like in training, I guess. But think he has bought two, to play two.

Hope he's absolutely clamming and the Indian takeaway he has ordered from the most delicious restautrant you can imagine gets delivered to the wrong address, he rings up they argue they've delivered, he totally loses his rag/goes all Pardew, ends up eating mackerel in tomato on toast and thinking he dare not order from there again.... That was too much information

good value as ever Reefa, you should have won funniest award (pictures even better than words!)

'Kin hell how surprising is that! Shall we start our own? Or maybe just chip in to theirs.

I hope he takes a high-profile job in the public eye and has a modicum of success which leads him to expose his most obnoxious self-aggrandising personality traits to the nation, who forever reflect this back to him like the most unforgiving mirror. Oh hang on...

Tough call! Does a poked eye beat a poorly finger? Finger, hands down.

Quite a niche joke, this one. A niche we've all been in Ian....I don't mean we've all been in your mother's nee-nee fella! Though I'm sure there would be no cause for complaint if we had... I mean from us... I'm stopping now. Thousand apologies: Ana asif

how come Tiote's fee is now being quoted as £4m! Shields Gazette in the know? Or GazETte in the sea?

I hope he asks Ben Arfa for a few language tips prior to his next holiday in Tunisia, and he ends-up trying to order "zabburummuk" in a Sousse beach bar....

I tried to get a "LUUUUK" chant going for the two-lunged brother in his debut against the Makems... nowt doing.

Why would you even present that as an argument? Because it has more substance then 'I use my eyes'. And it shows in some respect that this supposed gulf between Lamela and Townsend just doesn't exist. Where did you get the figures from Mozy? Had a look earlier and found one site which stated 63 premiership appearances, 12 of which were for QPR; and 5 goals, 2 of which were for QPR. Just looked more widely and found another which stated 61 premiership appearances (49 for Spurs, 28 of which were as a sub) and only three goals (presume they are the Spurs premiership ones). Not sure which figures are accurate, but 21 starts for Spurs and 12 for QPR is hardly ripping up trees over three and half seasons (79 possible games).

Once the sense of injustice has waned in time, I'm guessing both are likely to be things which are hard to look back upon with any sense of pride.

Aarons must be gutted. I don't know how he matches up in training (when fit), or even if he trains with them, but to put in a very credible pre-season, then see them chuck big bucks at Thauvin, then see them actively considering Townsend... can't be good.

Old policy: buy them young cheap and (usually) from abroad. Old aim: business model comes first, offset ridiculous 'staffing costs' with potential increased value post premiership experience. Old consequences:one-armed bandit variable reinforcement- every now and then hit the jackpot, never know when so temptation is to keep slotting your dosh until your wages are gone. Erode experience, spirit and cohesiveness of your squad; felt-sense of being part of a group of mercenaries/legionnaires rather than the Toon Army. Inevitable losing streak on the bandits = p*ss poor performances, alienation of well-informed fan base and risks of relegation. New policy: buy established but young (unsettled/down on their luck) proven premiership players. New aim: don't abandon business model, but for f***'s sake don't get relegated.... New consequences: duplication of roles we have already inadequately recruited to, add (youthful) experience and grit to the squad, risk of exhausting limited transfer kitty without securing key roles (as already filled by 'staff' we can't move on).

I've heard from a reliable sauce, that Clarencefield is to be housed with Colo's rabbits. The beginnings of a NUFC mini-farm in Leazes park, all will act as advisers to the board; Carr's apparently really excited awaiting receipt of Colback's Shetland Pony, so he can get it straight from...

When and where?

Haven't seen them/can't recall quality but think he got 2 in 12 games (canny return for a winger) in 2012-13.

After a bit of superficial Wise-Wiki type research, he seems to have 63 premiership appearances (inc 12 for QPR), a good number of these as a sub, over four seasons, scoring 5 league goals (11 in total). I was surprised how little he has played. He had lots of loans prior to this, as started in Spurs academy aged 8.

A winger who may need a run of games to get into form... Now why does that ring a bell?

Or a swap deal now, with a more orthodox striker also arriving this window...

For me: ------------------Saivet-----Shelvey-------------- Sissoko----------------------------------Anyone but... ----------------------Wijnaldum------------------ ---------------------Mitrovic----------------------

Personally I thought, still think, he was just reaching to locate the man he was meant to be marking. That is why his arm was there, not to aid his jump, nor to deliberately block the ball. If position makes a difference -- natural unnatural, high-low-a bit too camp -- (I don't know, and frankly can't be arsed to find out) then he was foolish to risk it. If the ref has to guess intent, based on the players movement/behaviour, then I think he's got it wrong, as he did for the Janmmat scything.

Damn! hoped that was going to read Riviere...

My 'fill in the gap' for Newcastle trying the unthinkable = Vardy. (no not Reg)