elbee909

He meant Jim Bowen. It's a bullseye!

Neymar never passes to Mbappé again either.

Who the hell drinks Carling.

No doubt they wouldn't give it to Howe anyway because of sportswashing etc. We'll just have to get used to that.

As far as the PL is concerned, we have to accept the Klopp has done a wonderful job taking the under-resourced underdogs of Liverpool to second place (aka 'nowhere'), which represents such a huge improvement on last season. If it's hard to take a breath at that, maybe you have asthma too and need some inhaler steroids? They're all the rage!

I'm surprised Grealish turned up to wherever it is to get pissed, as he hasn't turned up for Man City all season.

I didn't realise he was a member here

I'm sure Barry Glendumbarse will be quick to point this out.

Looks like all his pics are dick pics.

I think he's looked a bit better in recent games, but don't think he truly offers anything.

Post hoc specious reasoning mackematics. We didn't look mid-table after 11 games that's for sure.

He's still going, this Barry Dunnothing fella.

Didn't realise he'd been rejuvenated at Sunderland. Maybe it was running away from there at high speed that gave him a boost

Poor Real Madrid.

For what, Trippier?

Mangetout Rodders, Mangetout!

Chris Sutton never seems to fail to get things wrong. He's just a constant stream of crap.

"Albeit perhaps not the calibre of the star-studded name many might be expecting Newcastle to target in the upcoming window, Veretout’s vast top-flight experience across Europe would help to take Eddie Howe’s side to the next level. This season, the versatile star has directly contributed to 14 goals in 48 appearances under Jose Mourinho, earning an impressive 7.13 average match rating in the process whilst making 1.5 key passes, winning 2.6 duels and taking 46.3 touches on average per league game (Sofascore). Valued at £19.80million and under contract until 2024 (Transfermarkt), Veretout presents an affordable and astute option as Newcastle boss Howe attempts to freshen up the midfield department."

More chance of getting Jon Stead!

Butlins.

Who's going to want to manage PSG?

So now we just need a pre-season match against Bournemouth at St. James' with A-Ha playing at half time, yep?

Callum needs to change his karaoke song I'd say...

No dissing there

That's poster-worthy composition right there!