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West Ham agree fee in region of £15m with Liverpool for Andy Carroll

Pilko

by Pilko
in Football

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Guest neesy111

Guest neesy111

Posted
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They have better crossers of the ball than us, there's no validity to his point.

Like Maxi for example  :mackems:

 

And Kuyt. :mackems:

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Guest Heneage

Guest Heneage

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Barton is more creative than Gerrard now?

I don't see where anyone's said that, just that Barton's been predominantly out wide for us supplying crosses for Carroll.

 

I could be wrong but I'm sure he got most of his headed goals from set pieces so I think he'll do alright.

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NEEJ

NEEJ

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Hopefully he'll struggle settling and coping with teammates. Doing his thing in his free time. Coming back in a season or two for £12,73 m.

No thanks. Once a traitor, always a traitor.

 

Bollocks. Young and blinded by money - still a geordie. Would take him back at a flash.

Moron.

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taxfree

taxfree

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Posted

Hopefully he'll struggle settling and coping with teammates. Doing his thing in his free time. Coming back in a season or two for £12,73 m.

No thanks. Once a traitor, always a traitor.

 

Bollocks. Young and blinded by money - still a geordie. Would take him back at a flash.

Moron.

 

Of course he will.

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NEEJ

NEEJ

Posted
Posted

Hopefully he'll struggle settling and coping with teammates. Doing his thing in his free time. Coming back in a season or two for £12,73 m.

No thanks. Once a traitor, always a traitor.

 

Bollocks. Young and blinded by money - still a geordie. Would take him back at a flash.

Moron.

 

Of course he will.

My point still stands.

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taxfree

taxfree

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Posted

Hopefully he'll struggle settling and coping with teammates. Doing his thing in his free time. Coming back in a season or two for £12,73 m.

No thanks. Once a traitor, always a traitor.

 

Bollocks. Young and blinded by money - still a geordie. Would take him back at a flash.

Moron.

 

Of course he will.

My point still stands.

 

Ad hominem. Cute.

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Dokko

Dokko

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That's brilliant.  :lol:

 

 

For those who don't like linking off site:

 

While most Liverpool fans are dreaming of the wingers we need to sign to provide ammo for the big lump, I’m spitting feathers that we’ve spunked £35m on an ex-Newcastle United ape.

 

When his time comes, you can all but guarantee every newspaper carrying Frank Skinner’s obituary will give heavy rotation to the words ‘Three’ and ‘Lions’. As legacies go, not a cure for cancer but still infinitely more impressive than yours or mine.

 

However, should I still be around to raise a whimsical eyebrow in Frank’s honour, my over-riding memory of the man will not be “…and Nobby dancing” but a long-forgotten gag he made in 1994 at the expense of Leeds United.

 

Rarely is classical literature used as a springboard for terrace humour, a fact that only serves to make Skinner’s use of the “exchange me for a goat” monologue from Othello as proof that Shakespeare had prior knowledge of Howard Wilkinson’s defiantly cretinous plans to replace Eric Cantona with Brian Deane all the more impressive. The exact date of broadcast escapes me but it was expertly delivered from the comfort of the Fantasy Football League sofa sometime in the aforementioned year. Blink and you’d have missed it. I didn’t, and it made me laugh out loud on public transport for many a coming year.

 

Then one day the laughter stopped.

 

January 31st, 2011, to be precise. Having just watched the football club I’d supported for 35 birthdays piss away a million pounds for each of those years filling the vacant shirt of one Fernando Torres with what appeared from most angles to be a giraffe with an ASBO, I realised the joke was now very much on me.

 

Look, nobody wants to dwell on Deadline Day’s sensibility pogrom a minute longer than they have to, so let’s not mince our words: the former Magpie Andy Carroll is an oaf. A classless, guileless, one-dimensional oaf. And try as I might to convince myself otherwise, no amount of goals, flattering Opta stats or England caps will ever – ever – fool me into loving him.

 

To call this Loony Toon Neanderthal would be to short-change the unevolved. How on earth he’s come to be regarded as a footballer I’ll never know. He wouldn’t even be allowed into Arsenal’s club shop, never mind one of their teams.

 

Had Uncle Roy then promptly flushed the lion’s share of the El Nino windfall down the shitter drafting in Jimmy Nail’s pet ape as a replacement, Forensics would still be retrieving his entrails from the Stanley Park treetops

He’s Duncan Ferguson without the best bit: the sweatband. A liability off the pitch; an unsightly battering ram on it. If Al Qaeda designed a footballer, he’d be it. Hijack his mind and have him run forehead-first toward the infidel. And when I say run, I do, of course, mean lumber. Pedestrian? Put it this way, Liverpool labrador Dirk Kuyt, the only professional athlete I’m aware of who runs slower than he walks, is going to have to put the anchors on while Big Andy catches up.

 

While every other Liverpool fan seems cock-a-hoop to have the big lunk on board, I never received the free hallucinogens the club mailed out to the faithful, the powerful psychotropics that have our new No.9 looking like a messiah rather than Mike Teague in a football kit. So I’m left only to wonder soberly how events would’ve panned out had the previous incumbent overseen the deal instead of King Kenny.

 

In selling former Liverpool darling Torres alone there’d have been hundreds, thousands, burning Hodgson effigies outside the ground. Luckily all we got was a couple of dingbats melting Torres shirts behind the Kop. Had Uncle Roy then promptly flushed the lion’s share of the El Nino windfall down the shitter drafting in Jimmy Nail’s pet ape as a replacement, Forensics would still be retrieving his entrails from the Stanley Park treetops.

 

To make matters worse, on top of the arrests, the sick notes, the corn-rows, and the jaegerbombs, it’s since transpired our new lummox was so reluctant to sign for us he virtually had to be forced over the threshold at gunpoint, instantaneously stripping all passion from a player whose only worthy attribute is blood-curdling levels of local pride.

 

With that gone, he’s nowt but an empty vessel. A 6ft 4ins footballing void. A big black hole so short on smarts he can be easily outwitted by a humble barstool.

 

Now, I know it may seem a trifle harsh to be judging a player before he’s even kicked a ball, but to plagiarise a well-worn edict, you don’t need to lick a turd to know it tastes like shit. So I’ll go on telling anyone who’ll listen that I will never like the man; that I will never like the player; that I will never like the style of football he engenders. And for all the route-one filth he’ll one day foist on us, we may as well have stuffed the money in a shirt, planted it scarecrow-style in the opposition’s penalty area and commenced the barrage of aimless punts. The results would be much the same and with the money we’d save on keeping an artless Geordie crapshack out of jail we could treat ourselves to a proper fucking footballer for a change.

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Cronky

Cronky

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Credit to the bloke for sticking his neck out so bravely.

 

Carroll isn't a £35m player, but that price was closely linked to the amount that Chelsea were prepared to pay to land Torres. Liverpool wouldn't have let Torres go without bringing in Carroll as a replacement. We were able to drive a very hard bargain, and effectively Chelsea financed the deal.

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Ketsbaia

Ketsbaia

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Credit to the bloke for sticking his neck out so bravely.

 

Carroll isn't a £35m player, but that price was closely linked to the amount that Chelsea were prepared to pay to land Torres. Liverpool wouldn't have let Torres go without bringing in Carroll as a replacement. We were able to drive a very hard bargain, and effectively Chelsea financed the deal.

 

Sounds like we had a chat with Chelsea to decide the optimum bids. Which makes the failure to loan Daniel Sturridge even more infuriating.....

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quayside

quayside

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Credit to the bloke for sticking his neck out so bravely.

 

Carroll isn't a £35m player, but that price was closely linked to the amount that Chelsea were prepared to pay to land Torres. Liverpool wouldn't have let Torres go without bringing in Carroll as a replacement. We were able to drive a very hard bargain, and effectively Chelsea financed the deal.

 

Sounds like we had a chat with Chelsea to decide the optimum bids. Which makes the failure to loan Daniel Sturridge even more infuriating.....

 

Unfortunately the basis of the Sturridge deal had probably been sorted several days earlier. Torres' exit  was clearly on the cards for some time so Bolton got in early with some sort of agreement "If you get  Torres can we have Sturridge on loan?" Everyone on here will have an opinion on when Carroll came into the whole equation and when it became obvious he was away but I reckon Sturridge was not an option for us.

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Pilko

Pilko

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I need to see him play in a Liverpool shirt like, it'll be like closure on this whole thing for me. Obviously I now hope he turns out to be absolutely bollocks and injury ravaged.

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