The Alan Pardew bullshit thread

[RUHRLYASLEEVESUP]

4 hours ago, Kid Icarus said:

 

Remember vividly sitting on a beach on holiday, literally in paradise, rage posting as we let Rafa leave and brought in Steve Bruce. It took that situation to come to fully accept that I needed to let go. Best thing that ever happened tbh, had a good couple of years of being like McNulty on the boat shift 

Apart from accidentally cutting my cock off with a pair of rusty secateurs & inadvertently shooting myself in the head with a BB gun, this was undoubtedly the worst day of my miserable existence 

[TheBrownBottle]

4 hours ago, Menace said:

 

I must have seen this gif in excess of a 100 times and I still have no idea what he's trying to do

 

[54]

It is some achievement that Pardew isnt my most hated manager of my lifetime like, it's a testament to Bruce really, takes some next level twatishness to beat Pardew, and here we are

[TheBrownBottle]

1 minute ago, 54 said:

It is some achievement that Pardew isnt my most hated manager of my lifetime like, it's a testament to Bruce really, takes some next level twatishness to beat Pardew, and here we are

He’s not close to Souness, Allardyce, JFK or Bruce for me.  I also find McClaren more dislikable  

[timeEd32]

He's right at the top for me, though partially a victim of circumstance. I still had misguided hope at the time he was manager. The day he left felt like things could turn and then somewhere during Carver/McClaren it became clear to me how pointless it all was. I barely enjoyed Rafa and didn't really care at all during Bruce -- there was only one real villain at that point.

 

I hate that there are good memories attached to Pardew -- Tiote and the 4-4, Ba/Cisse/Ben Arfa, and my first time at SJP.

[jcat]

8 minutes ago, TheBrownBottle said:

He’s not close to Souness, Allardyce, JFK or Bruce for me.  I also find McClaren more dislikable  

Its the length of time we had to suffer pardew that puts him at the top of my list. 
twice as long as Bruce! 🤮

[TheBrownBottle]

1 minute ago, jcat said:

Its the length of time we had to suffer pardew that puts him at the top of my list. 
twice as long as Bruce! 🤮

All fair enough  - he was an obvious yes-man who only got the job due to drinking in the same casino as Ashley.  But I still dislike Bruce, Allardyce and Souness a lot more.  Difference between shit and shite, mind you

[Keggy_Keagal]

Pardew had so much much backing and some real quality players, look at what he was given to work with compared to say Hughton or Rafa.  The second half of season we finished 5th he stumbled across a front three with Ben Arfa right, Cisse central and Ba left, with Cabaye and Tiote in the midfield. Then completely fucked it the next season by putting Cisse right side, dropping Ben Arfa and putting Ba through the middle. He was clueless as to what had worked and why it wasn't any longer. Was coming back from somewhere recently with a friend and they had that farce of a radio show on Talkshite on . He cracks on like he was never given any help from Ashley and was some kind of miracle worker. Hate the bloke. 

[ikri]

5 minutes ago, Keggy_Keagal said:

Pardew had so much much backing and some real quality players, look at what he was given to work with compared to say Hughton or Rafa.  The second half of season we finished 5th he stumbled across a front three with Ben Arfa right, Cisse central and Ba left, with Cabaye and Tiote in the midfield. Then completely fucked it the next season by putting Cisse right side, dropping Ben Arfa and putting Ba through the middle. He was clueless as to what had worked and why it wasn't any longer. Was coming back from somewhere recently with a friend and they had that farce of a radio show on Talkshite on . He cracks on like he was never given any help from Ashley and was some kind of miracle worker. Hate the bloke. 

 

Same with his weird obsession about bringing a left back on as sub.  It must have worked one time and he kept repeating the same "tactic" over and over despite it never working again.

 

He had no idea what he was doing.

[Miggys First Goal]

Don’t worry, @Alan Pardew, I’ve grown to like you since you left us 

[Collage]

1 hour ago, TheBrownBottle said:

He’s not close to Souness, Allardyce, JFK or Bruce for me.  I also find McClaren more dislikable  

Pardew is ”top” of the list for me, closely followed by Bruce. Then Carver probably. I don’t even dislike McClaren, he was just shite.

[Ghandis Flip-Flop]

42 minutes ago, ikri said:

 

Same with his weird obsession about bringing a left back on as sub.  It must have worked one time and he kept repeating the same "tactic" over and over despite it never working again.

 

He had no idea what he was doing.

Not to mention the forum staple "floated set penis to Mike Williamson" too

[Ghandis Flip-Flop]

He's an odious, narcissistic twat who shouldn’t have been anywhere near this club, given his previous position was at League One Southampton. He's just a younger Joe Kinnear and every bit as undeserving of the position he found himself in, purely because our owner was an equally odious twat that anyone with any self respect didn’t want to work for.

[kingxlnc]

Hated him for what he did to Ben Arfa but that 2012 season was the best since SBR for me until the takeover. 
 

Bruce is levels and levels above him in terms of hatred, Carver not too far behind, as is Souness and Dalglish.

[Yorkie]

Can't resist the debate whenever it comes up. 

 

In 2013, Pardew convinced Ashley it wasn't worth competing. And then we endured that situation for eight years.

 

Bruce is almost more detestable as a bloke but Pardew is the answer, always. Souness and co don't even register for me.

[Dr Venkman]

3 hours ago, TheBrownBottle said:

He’s not close to Souness, Allardyce, JFK or Bruce for me.  I also find McClaren more dislikable  

[TheBrownBottle]

1 hour ago, kingxlnc said:

Hated him for what he did to Ben Arfa but that 2012 season was the best since SBR for me until the takeover. 
 

Bruce is levels and levels above him in terms of hatred, Carver not too far behind, as is Souness and Dalglish.

Yep.  I still despise Dalglish.  Dalglish and Souness fucking wrecked the club (twice).  Pardew managed a zombie club. 

[Yorkie]

6 minutes ago, TheBrownBottle said:

Yep.  I still despise Dalglish.  Dalglish and Souness fucking wrecked the club (twice).  Pardew managed a zombie club. 

 

Pardew had a massive hand in that. 

[Kid Icarus]

Pardew was the chief PR for the zombie club, Ashley the architect. If Ashley was the cancer, Pardew was the day to day symptoms. Pardew was the peak era of the zombification of our fanbase too. Under everyone else under Ashley the fanbase could see what needed to change and were vocal about it.

 

Pardew was fucking Goebbels for Ashley, giving us a hellish purgatory and telling us it was heaven. And huge parts of the fanbase didn't just lap it up, they defended him.

 

The bloke is a cunt, he ran with the hare and hunted with the hounds. Pretending his hands were tied and that he couldn't possibly do more under a repressive owner on one side of his mouth, then using the other side to tell us we should be thanking Ashley. Cunt.

 

Souness for all his faults had a backbone and believed in trying to be successful. Outside of football you hear a lot about his decency too. Dalglish dismantled the best squad this side of Howe's, but again, wanted to succeed and did succeed elsewhere. Again, stories about his decency outside of football.

 

Pardew was here as the face for and a knowing participant in Ashley's project to make this a pauper club he could peddle his tat through. Both had zero interest in any definition of success as we widely know it. Acting like the club was worthy of nothing, had never achieved anything, and now we should say thank you for it. And so many adopted that mindset through him, it was unbelievable. He had a lot of our fanbase under a spell that only broke when he left.

 

He completely changed the perception I had of our fanbase as one that was zero bullshit, wouldn't accept chancers, and that would force the likes of him and Ashley out through collective action. 

 

By 2014 my perception of our fanbase couldn't have been more wrong or any lower.

 

Stabbing Hughton in the back, peddling out our players, lying, nutting opposition players, calling managers cunts, jobs for the boys, Pardewing players, terrible football, terrible results, excuses, openly insulting the fans. The response for the most part? 5th, Ashley's the real problem, be careful what you wish for. I'm still a bit shocked by all of that 10 years later tbh. 

 

But aye, I wasn't here for Bruce so can't include him, but Pardew was Infinitely worse than Souness and Dalglish, it's not even a contest for me. Even if I conceded that they were worse, you knew with them that the intention to do better was in the pipeline if and when they failed. Pardew's relentless failure was Ashley's idea of steady success, so that was never going to happen like it would have under Shepherd. 

 

 

Edited 14 hours ago by Kid Icarus

[TheBrownBottle]

1 hour ago, Yorkie said:

 

Pardew had a massive hand in that. 

Agreed 

[Ronaldo]

I think Pardew going to Palace was one of the happiest days of my adult life up until that point. 

 

Bruce was worse. That’s the best thing I can say about him.

[HaydnNUFC]

I was probably just a tad too young to fully appreciate the role that Pardew played in the destruction of expectation et al (I'd just turned 14 when he left for Palace  ) making Bruce my most hated manager by some way. But as time has allowed there's been a bit of revisionism about him and all of it flat out wrong.

 

Pardew's shtick throughout 2012-13 scarred many of our fans and Ashley. After every shit result, performance, defeat and/or injury he'd blame it on the Europa League when was more than happy to only bring in Amalfitano and Anita in the summer before he started to do the 'its cuz of yewrup' to cover his own arse.* Many of our fans bought it and I think still do, in seasons gone by a few of our fans have said how they don't want Europa League or Conference League: Champions League or nothing so nothing is fine, and imo its due to those tropes and it all stems from Pardew and that season. Think also that Ashley bought it hence why we never overly strengthened in January from a moderate position of security (like bringing in Cisse in January in 2011-12), the ambition after 2012-13 was just to float from 17th-10th as Europe to the club then just like the cups (  ) only brought a risk of injuries therefore a risk of relegation and that sweet Sports Direct advertising.

 

*He's since brought up that the remit in summer 2012 was to keep the 2011-12 side together as the funds weren't there for improvement due to Ashley, yet would dedicate wins like the 2-0 one over Chelsea in 2013 to 'Mike'. 

 

The only half decent thing I can say about Pardew is he's never gone down the road that the likes of Souness has done after leaving here regarding NUFC being tough to manage because of the fans and expectations etc etc when he easily could've done since he's left. Shame he just couldn't be positive about the club when he was actually its fucking manager.

 

 

Edited 23 hours ago by HaydnNUFC

[Dr Venkman]

Aye, but for all Souness is a sour prick who won’t take responsibility for his own poor performance, he’s making those comments as a person who I believe was actually trying to make NUFC successful. He was just shit at it.

 

Pardew was an entirely different thing, for reasons plenty of people, myself included, have written thousands of words about on here and elsewhere. 
 

I’ve thought about this a lot and I think the word vampire is the best I can come up with to describe his (intentional) effect on the club and the fans.

 

He was an absolute disaster for this club on so many levels, and he knew what he was doing. It was intentional. The rest are just shit managers.

[Dr Venkman]

I fucking hate him.

[80]

2 hours ago, Kid Icarus said:

Pardew was the chief PR for the zombie club, Ashley the architect. If Ashley was the cancer, Pardew was the day to day symptoms. Pardew was the peak era of the zombification of our fanbase too. Under everyone else under Ashley the fanbase could see what needed to change and were vocal about it.

 

Pardew was fucking Goebbels for Ashley, giving us a hellish purgatory and telling us it was heaven. And huge parts of the fanbase didn't just lap it up, they defended him.

 

The bloke is a cunt, he ran with the hare and hunted with the hounds. Pretending his hands were tied and that he couldn't possibly do more under a repressive owner on one side of his mouth, then using the other side to tell us we should be thanking Ashley. Cunt.

 

Souness for all his faults had a backbone and believed in trying to be successful. Outside of football you hear a lot of his decency too. Dalglish dismantled the best squad this side of Howe, but again, wanted to succeed and did succeed elsewhere. Again, stories about his decency outside of football.

 

Pardew was here as the face for and a knowing participant in Ashley's project to make this a pauper club he could peddle his tat through. Both had zero interest in any definition of success as we widely know it. Acting like the club was worthy of nothing, had never achieved anything, and now we should say thank you for it. And so many adopted that mindset through him, it was unbelievable. He had a lot of our fanbase under a spell that only broke when he left.

 

He completely changed the perception I had of our fanbase as one that was zero bullshit, wouldn't accept chancers, and that would force the likes of him and Ashley out through collective action. 

 

By 2014 my perception of our fanbase couldn't have been more wrong or any lower.

 

Stabbing Hughton in the back, peddling out our players, lying, nutting opposition players, calling managers cunts, jobs for the boys, Pardewing players, terrible football, terrible results, excuses, openly insulting the fans. The response for the most part? 5th, Ashley's the real problem, be careful what you wish for. I'm still a bit shocked by all of that 10 years later tbh. 

 

But aye, I wasn't here for Bruce so can't include him, but Pardew was Infinitely worse than Souness and Dalglish, it's not even a contest. Even if I conceded that they were worse, which I would never do, you knew with them that the intention to do better was in the pipeline if and when they failed. Pardew's relentless failure was Ashley's idea of steady success, so that was never going to happen like it would have under Shepherd. 

 

 

 

Bang on.