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Dan Ashworth (on gardening leave)


Rich

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1 hour ago, aussiemag said:


Exactly. Think he might be a bit of a salesman/bull shit artist. 

The “hub and spoke” shit he came out with is pure McKinsey/Bain/Big 4 consulting speak gobbledygook. He’ll be selling Man Utd the full Target Operating Model and Cost-Out Transformation package.

 

 IMG_5790.jpeg.380e61191edeb3a45c3c2b28363b632c.jpeg

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10 minutes ago, Nucasol said:

The “hub and spoke” shit he came out with is pure McKinsey/Bain/Big 4 consulting speak gobbledygook. He’ll be selling Man Utd the full Target Operating Model and Cost-Out Transformation package.

 

 IMG_5790.jpeg.380e61191edeb3a45c3c2b28363b632c.jpeg

Yeah he’s a handshake wordsmith. Practicing in the fine art of wordsmithery

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Can't remember what article it was, but there was something about him conducting a thorough 6 month audit of the issues at all the departments at the club, before presenting it back to the board.

 

Have an image of someone wandering about talking to people for 6 months, popping it all into an interactive pdf for the board, just to repeat back to them everything they already knew.

 

But GUYS! I have the solution! It's ME! In a system based on wheels!! And I'm the middle wheel! Do you see? Do you really? Wheels!!

 

Aye Dan. We'd asked you to sort Joelinton's contract. Now, about these e-mails.

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He’s probably misspelt his email on the forms so hasn’t had the dates through. That and he can’t answer his phone from unknown numbers in case it’s someone trying to catch him working for ineos.

1 hour ago, et tu brute said:

Wasn't his case due to be held at the end of May? 
 

 

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1 minute ago, gbandit said:

Mainoo. Think he’s the only player of theirs I’d love to have 

Wan Bissaka would be decent cover for Tino if Trippier moves on but yeah other than that wouldn’t want any of them 

 

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3 hours ago, Upthemags said:

Word from ITK I have reasonable confidence to believe is that Dan purchased some nice Begonia bulbs this weekend - plans to plant them within the next week.

Well at least he's got plenty of time if it's chucking it down and he's not off down Chelsea feeding them our targets under the guise of booking his plot at the flower show

 

 

Edited by gjohnson

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6 hours ago, Upthemags said:

Word from ITK I have reasonable confidence to believe is that Dan purchased some nice Begonia bulbs this weekend - plans to plant them within the next week.

Begonias flower in summer and should be planted in spring. They're also tender so probably won't survive the winter up north. All very on brand for Ashworth.

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