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They will both break down before they reach each other to be fair.

You’re right but it’s absolutely galling watching them cherry pick some elite talent without a care in the world whilst openly cooking the books as an established “top 6” team. Fuck modern football.

I'd be well up for this! When he missed that one near the end at SJP, it felt like it was DCL failing his audition. However if Chris Wood can turn it around against my expectations, maybe DCL can too.

I mean, yeah. Mbuemo ticked all the boxes didn’t he. Goals and assists for days. Would have flourished under Eddies mags. But - bigger picture stuff - he’s chose the dollar. By all accounts he’s quadrupled his wages - fair fucks to him. How many players have moved to that club and dropped off? Nearly all of them? There you go. I fully trust Howe, given his recent comments, to strengthen the team.

The last thing you should trust is a ST from Bundesliga

The Spurs fans’ song about Sol Campbell remains the sickest I’ve heard, if we don’t include any of the ones revelling in actual death

Very impressive. Won’t mind a 50m bid.

£60million fee and over £200,000 per week? No thank you. And I hope Spurs bid that £60million up a bit too.

Palace were interested in him last year I believe.

Yeh tbf

200m spent last year. 120m this year and the first window is hardly open, but remember lads. As bad as Ashley.

If he brings us David, Davies or Bombito I'm cool with it.

Monaco quoting 70 million euros for him. Linked to PSG, Man City and Liverpool.

Mad that. Nowt like keeping a low profile like going dressed as the only banana in the room. Surely people would have asked why, and with his distinctive and recognisable voice I'm surprised he got out hassle free.

We haven't sponsored a poster to get their flying license yet? Let's get serious about this ITK shit.

I would imagine that such a hiring would require an approval from a particular key person/group and there’s the bottleneck right there. The kind of decision where, if it doesn’t work out, would be very hard to pin it on someone else…..creates a certain reluctance in said key person/persons.

Obviously get him signed, mind.

I'm 45 this year and have never played footy but I think I'd be good for at least 5 goals in Ligue 1.

Would sooner sign Kluivert he was absolutely destructive against us

Hope we look abroad. Elanga. Madueke, Dibling and Semenyo do not fill me with excitement, don’t think they’re good enough and would cost a fortune.

When Ekitike turned us down we got Isak - bigger and better players to come

Aye I know. But PSR maybe let’s turn some 30m players into 60m players

Like many other have said choosing Man Utd right now is a big sign that a players has no brain. Move on. Semenyo the next one that were all desperate for now? Wouldn't be impressed to see Elanga or Madueke sign. Some random kid from the continent seems likely.

You know what randomly popped into my head, that chant of "Steven Taylor, we wish you were dead." Is that a contender for the worst chant of all time? Like, ignore how tasteless it is, even the most abhorrent chants at least usally have.. something? Like a reference, a rhyme, a sectarian strereotype, some horrible words that fit nicely into an established tune, a sick joke. But that was just "You play for Newcastle. Hope you die." No wit, no guile, no nothing. You could fit any other four syllable player or manager into it, and yet nobody ever has.