David Icke - Son of God

I heard he got lifted, like. The only bit of bother I saw came when everyone was jumping in the rubbish post-match and two lads had a bit of a coming together. Completely accidental, but one smacked the other. Out of order and very silly.

Gupter's beard

Our hotel was just across the road so we might have done. I say might because I can't remember getting back to our room on either night. One minute I'm in a bar, the next I wake up with a stinking hangover.

It's all a bit sedate on our train at the moment. I promised myself I'd not drink until we crossed the channel given my status as a one can wonder, however I'm close to giving in and gannin on the hoy now.

We're on our way...

Cracking news that. Atmosphere in the square will be something else.

Might see you's both.... Be on the lookout for a goatee'd midget with a Craig Bellamy look-a-like, a Xavi Alonso double, a 7 foot babyface and a tatooed narcoleptic. You're going with TheGuv?

I'm not even sure if I'm joking any more

8:58 for me. What time Eurostar are you on?

My offer still stands - get me three tickets and I'll pipe you off in Market Square.

It didn't look like a red in real time and no number of replays (everything looks worse when played in slow motion because movement looks completely unnatural at that speed) will convince me otherwise. His foot was high but if there was even an ounce of intent he'd have planted his studs firmly in his calf. He was silly for going in on a player like Suarez like that though. It was a lazy challenge and he should've seen yellow for it but it does stick in my throat when you see incidents, such as Sterling kicking out at Simpson, go completely unpunished. I don't think intent can be in doubt there.

Sky's coverage was, for want of a better word, partisan. You couldn't have got more bias had they allowed LFC TV to broadcast the game.

The town was bouncing afterwards. Absolutely everyone was in a fantastic mood.

Very much doubt it on a November evening which could be wet and windy. More a summer tournament kind of thing. They did it in Brussels for the Scotland match a few weeks back, so it is possible. I imagine every bar will be showing the game. They'll be missing a trick if they don't.

Ended up in Madison's with my arm around the shoulder of some complete stranger singing "We all live in Kevin Nolan's house" down his mobile to what I assume was a Mackem pal of his.

Miles Starforth @milesstarforth More info from Bruges police in tonight's @shieldsgazette. Got press release entitled 'Bruges happy to welcome NUFC fans'. Climbdown? #nufc

Are we sure it's not just the fact the latest Argie squad has been announced and he's not in it while Franco di cunting Santo is?

They seem to be staggered to discover that Adam Johnson is in fact slow and shit

Redknapp won't move from the south, and he's got the QPR job waiting for him (and Tony Fernandes' chequebook) when Hughes gets the boot in a few months.

Short won't sell them (he's a lot more dedicated than most owners. He takes a genuine interest in the foundation for example rather than just using it as a CSR gesture) but if the O'Neill experiment fails I can see him forcing the club to cut its cloth.

To be fair we did have to score for them. And we were playing with ten men. And Martin Atkinson couldn't have been more of a homer if he'd tried.

He got the hump when Shearer came in and implemented all his rules because under Kinnear he'd been turning up for training when he wanted. I seem to remember his mystery injury before the Stoke game going down like a shit sandwich.

We got a reference code to get both sets of tickets (travel in the UK & Eurostar) from one of those self service machines.

My overriding memory of Martins comes from one game where he rounded the keeper twice. The first time he needed to welly it, so he tried to stroke it in gently with his foot and the defender got back to clear it. The second time all he had to do was finesse it and he'd have scored, so he put his laces through it and missed. Such a stupid footballer.

I use it like it's going out of fashion.