Rich

Aye, as far as the price goes, I'd think you'd be lucky to get Berbatov for £20M, whoever you were. I'd expect to see closer to £30M if he does go, personally.

Despite the potential daftness going on here, I wouldn't be surprised if we at least enquire about Berbatov this summer. I would be surprised if he'd even consider us, like.

At least we're aiming high, if this is true. I'd rather we did that than not even bother, tbh, one of them might just come off.

My cousin loves the lad (Sunderland ST holder) and would be absolutely gutted by this. It's probably cack though. Dunno why he'd come here to battle for first team football when he's first choice at the Mackems.

Do we need more young centre-halves though? We've been after a leader in the defence for years and while there is a lot of good about him, Abdoulaye Faye doesn't fill that role.

Let's just spell Jimenez and Vetere right first of all, eh?

I like that Pompey one.

EH!? Did he close his eyes whenever Gomis came close to the ball? What if Diane and Gomis got close to each other? That would be a right dilemma! I've just split my sides laughing. You should go on tour. I'm just wondering why all the attention is on Diane, a player who i hear is quite average, and not the guy we've been linked to for 5 months. Lighten up man, was only joshing. I think it's just because it's a new link more than anything. The Gomis stuff has been doing the rounds for a while now. Plus, we've had direct quotes from Diane re: Keegan/Owen/Martins which has obviously caught the interest of the media because it's an easy story.

Juan Marino? He was good in the NFL like. (That was bad, wasn't it?)

Go on then.

Are you Hoddle is disguise? Are you Hod-dle in dis-guise?

Chinese whispers is a tough game man, you probably heard wrong We're signing Zheng Zhiyi from Charlton? The China Captain?

EH!? Did he close his eyes whenever Gomis came close to the ball? What if Diane and Gomis got close to each other? That would be a right dilemma!

well, yes actually. anyway 5/30 is f****** atrocious, and i'm not saying for a low fee we should not think about it, but there's no way i'd be happy with a striker scoring 5 goals in 30 starts here. But we don't know the circumstances of those games. He may have been playing out wide or deep for all we know. Aye exactly. Some people don't think like that though. It's all straight lines and closed boxes.

I've been as guilty as anyone, really. I just wanted to waste some time. Just blasted out another 2,000 words! Let's get it back on track though, for those who actually want to massdebate about it. Keep Duff, sell Charlie.

At least this proves that it is actually Dave behind the mask.

It is, isn't it? From the book 'A Kestrel for a Knave' and the film 'Kes'. After a swift Google (dunno why I even bothered), Dave is right. It's a peregrine falcon called "Kes". I appreciate you trying to half the bullet with me though.

I don't think Keegan is the kind of manager who tells a player to look for a new club as they are shite. He'd wait for the first bid, inform the player of it, and then tell the player that he can't guarantee first team football etc. FWIW, every game is a fresh chance for me. If I see Duff, or Smith, or Fumaca on the team sheet, I hope they prove me wrong. There is always a way back. Why would we see Fumaca on the team sheet? Dennis Wise's fault.

Why the fuck does he call it Kes then? I thought it was short for Kestrel! Fucking hell man, it's been a while since I saw Bo' Selecta you know! Heartless bastard. Hates the disabled (can we even say that these days?) an' all you know?

Duff will still need replacing though, whether Zog stays or not, you kestrel-carrying, catheter-wearing, big-jawed bassa! (Anyone with your accent reminds me of Craiiiiig David, apologies.) I give up, anyway. Arguing for something you don't really believe in isn't much fun, even if it's just me yet again avoiding the assignment. I dunno how NE5 does it, unless he's constantly avoiding something far worse. His wife? (I hope he sees this: BANTER.) Even though the lad is quite clearly disadvantaged and has had some horrific injuries which even an advantaged person would struggle to overcome, let's put all that aside and simply say: he's not good enough to wear our number 11 shirt and should fuck off to Sunderland ASAP to battle it out with Kieron Richardson for a place on their injury bench. The little Irsh cunt. Sorted.

Off the top of my head I can tell you he's a full-back first and foremost, plays mainly left-back but is versatile. He's never stood out to me in any way shape or form when I remember seeing him for Valencia in the past.

See above, you mongazoid I'm off to start the Damien Duff fanclub. We should support footballers with down's.

In fairness, a lot of people had written Michael Owen off before his recent run of form, and the likes of Butt, Barton and Geremi were being called worse than shite by some as well. Now, I realise Geremi and Barton haven't become world-beaters or anything, but the improvement under KK has been remarkable. I'd just like to see the likes of Duff - and Milner to an extent - given the same chance that those players have, and if they don't do it, then ship them out. I suppose KK will know already whether he wants to keep them or not, like. I just don't think players turn to shite, to be honest, I think he has enough class about him to be able to be effective again, but it's going to take a lot of hard work. Like Shak has said, it wasn't so much pace he relied on as his ability to "jink", for want of a better word. I think he still knows how to beat a man but a potential combination of a lack of confidence and a lack of playing time has seen him lose his spark. I think players have come back from being worse than him, honestly, and he's not a player I have anything personal against. Seems a good pro, seems to give a toss, and like Owen before him has put the graft in to get fit again after a horrendous injury. I just don't like writing players off 100% when none of us really know what the overall craic is with them, bar what we see on the pitch. I do accept that and you're right in a way. Duff has shown absolutely nothing in his time here that makes me think he's worth hnaging onto though. That's fair enough as well, like I said I'm just exploring different avenues, trying to make people think a bit. I appreciate the reply though, it's better than divertory nonsense about N'Zogbia and agents

Ten times is a serious over-exaggeration

Brummie was actually responding to Gol's prediction that you lot would finish top six simply because you're buying a lot of players in, with what was a fairly reasonable argument. Don't think it was intended as a proper dig at Spurs, more at the argument itself. But you know, horses for courses and all that.