Chris_R

And that they already have.

Not only that, but he admits he had EIGHTY serious applicants from within the football world and he still chose Carver. Probably 79 of them were under contract so their CVs went straight in the bin, the cheap tosser.

Oh my. He's said he's going to improve communication then all he's done is tell the fans to be nice to John. Thanks Lee, that's great. Plus his idea of appointing a decent manager was to not appoint one and give Carver the gig instead. Remember the 80 applicants he shouted his mouth off about? This is the result. So far Charnley is failing. He'll get some slack if and when he starts succeeding, not whilst he's doing s*** on the grounds that he might start doing better later if we're nice about him.

He's got a bird?! If you can't get a girl to fuck you when you're managing director of Newcastle United, you really need to give up on life. The fact that he's got that title and is still hanging out the back of that moose shows he can't even sell himself very well, so no wonder he's doing such a shit job for Newcastle.

That was a proper "Aids V Cancer" shitoff.

The annoying thing is that our results under Carver will be held up to show how well Pardew was doing at Newcastle, when really we've replaced a sub-standard manager with an absolute clownshoes no-mark.

I can't remember a shitter sub than that.

Played a right footed player at right back. Fucking hell, what a crazy idea. Why are we blessed with utter tosspots for managers?

I know you said you know it's different but we asked for Rossi, and he was only one player. This is 5 players that the manager didn't ask for or want.

Apologies if it comes across as dickier than intended, but why do you even waste your time watching online? Habit? Something to do on a weekend? Something to talk about at work on Monday? Why watch anything, I watch QI but don't celebrate Alan Davies' correct answers by jumping out of my chair and fist pumping the air. I guess it's all of the above really.

I'm completely broken and have been for a while. Not one penny goes to Newcastle United, SD or Sky. I watch the matches online for free, and I guess I always will, but I felt no emotion about the score. We beat Hull and whilst I smiled at the goals, I didn't celebrate. That wasn't a conscious decision on my part, it was just that I genuinely felt almost nothing. It was like watching Villa V Everton, or Stoke V Swansea, or any other combination of teams from anywhere in world football really. f*** them. Why should I care about a club that doesn't care about itself? Why should I invest money or emotion into something that's pointless, that will never invest back into me? What, quite frankly, is the point?

My god we're dire. Cabella's bright. Ayoze is talented. Sissoko can drive on nicely. But other than that, we're a fucking awful team and so dreadful to watch.

Everything about this club disgusts me now.

Disgusting deal. Every aspect of MYM's time here sickens me.

I wondered about this too. However I'm sure if there was a secret area, I'd have heard about it.

I'm fucking done if that happens. I've been mugged off by this rabble far too often now, they simply have to make a footballing decision this time.

What is this crazy talk of which you speak?

I love the internet. People somehow managing to turn what I wrote into some kind of anti-Garde piece when I clearly said, twice, that I'd be happy with him. For absolute clarity: I'd be happy with him. To further clarify what I was trying to say: I don't mind if the appointment process takes longer, provided we appoint the best candidate. If that's not Garde because we find someone better, then fucking great.

f*** that man, just get Garde in. Disagree tbh. It surely depends who the other candidates are. I'd be pleased with Garde, but if the other 3 we're interviewing are even better then I'm happy to wait. To be realistic about Garde, he took over Lyon 3 years after they'd won Ligue 1 for SEVEN consecutive years. His win record of 51% is good, but not spectacular. In the years before Garde took over and after their streak of 7 titles, Lyon finished 3rd, then 2nd, then 3rd again. Then the Garde years: 2011-2012 - 4th - 64pts - Europa League group stages 2012-2013 - 3rd - 67pts - CL qualification 2013-2014 - 5th - 61pts - Only just qualifying for the Europa League To mitigate that, of course he had boatloads of players sold. But the overall trajectory seems to be (very slowly) downwards and currently, without Garde, Lyon are 2nd. Don't misunderstand me, I'd be happy with him. But I don't see him as some kind of miracle appointment who we just MUST get. That said, I know virtually nothing of French football.

Peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming and crying like his customers.

Notice at the bottom of the screen that they're still running on a trial version of the software, which has expired. Methinks that's almost certainly illegal, especially when used for commercial purposes. Tight bastards.

Well exactly. In mitigation, Man Yoo fans could point to the previous season under Fergie though and say "But we're better than that", whereas after 4 years of a manager you can't do that anymore. Wherever you are, you are. If Moyes had stayed for 4 years and finished 7th, 3rd, 9th and 8th, then was 7th mid-way through the next season, the above argument would work perfectly. You could just say "But your expensive, high-rep signings aren't that good" and "Moyes is doing a great job with an average squad who aren't as good as you think they are". Tack on "Your expectations are too high, you're being unrealistic" to top it all off. Sounds horribly familiar and it's such a shit argument. The crap football and actual quality of the squad need critiquing as part of the ananlysis, not just looking at the league table, declaring that you're in the position you're in and that therefore all is well. That's fucking crazy talk.

Double negative fail.

That argument is so retarded and fundamentally flawed. Always goes something like this: - Newcastle finished 10th - Newcastle are therefore the 10th best team - Finishing 10th is therefore what is expected - Alan Pardew therefore did well - Newcastle fans should therefore be happy Points 1-3 could be applied to literally any finishing position in any league with any side, and points 4&5 just get tacked on the end. It's so fucking lazy, flawed and ridiculous yet a crazy number of people still trot it out.

A) The "rough" ride should have been a hell of a lot rougher. B) If you didn't like the rough ride, Alan, maybe try being competent at your job?