Pilko

I always thought episodes dropping on streaming services worked the same way as scheduling an email to send, in that it would go out automatically. Turns out there's an Amazon Man who has to press the button who's either fallen asleep, gone for a massive difficult shit or nipped out for a late night takeaway and forgot we're due our next episode. Ah well.

Seeing rumours about Salah away to Al-Ittihad, apparently on more money than Ronaldo. Would be absolutely fucking mint if they took him off the Scouse twats.

I wonder if the signing of Heffernan and the emergence of Murphy A means we're waiting a wee bit before splurging on a young-20s CB in case one of those can break through and make the grade by the time Schar is away?

Chelsea 2-0 Luton Bournemouth 1-2 Spurs Arsenal 3-0 Fulham Brentford 2-0 Palace Everton 1-1 Wolves Man United 2-1 Forest Brighton 3-1 West Ham Burnley 0-1 Villa Sheff United 0-3 Man City Newcastle 2-1 Liverpool

This Paqueta stuff is infuriating when I recall that I needed him to get a yellow for about a grand in the 1-1 draw at home last season and for the last half an hour the cunt barely made a fucking tackle. Suppose the Brazilian betting syndicate were on holiday that weekend.

That's a great wee reveal video.

It's so nice nowadays that fees or wages from loans/sales are marked as "saved" or "recouped" as opposed to the lexicon of the Ashley-era, where said funds would have been "trousered".

Yeah? Against karate?

I have so much time for this reference like. Class.

Pards sat with the Palace lot

"We think he's innocent so we won't release him, but our pesky fans and those snowflake charities think he isn't, so we won't play him either. Can we start the bidding at £30m please..."

Foster Cech Krul Schwarzer De Gea Fabianski Hart Howard Lloris Pope Would be my stab at it.

Everton can't rely on Calvert-Lewin long term, the bloke is made of biscuits.

I hope Villa are getting a discount on all these constant t-shirt orders they're putting in with injured players names on.

Hope we absolutely wipe the floor with these. Let's show them what it's actually like to be a victim.

Worked hard, got shown up for having little quality. He'll have better games than that against worst opposition but tonight even the basics were poor with the ball.

Frustrating as always at the Etihad but in a different way to years gone by. Just like Wilson kicking fresh air when he was poised to score last year, this year he made an arse of that 3-on-1 situation we had and Bruno caught a free attempt at goal with his studs like a Sunday morning player. There's something about the Etihad where our players seem to fall to pieces in front of goal every time we create something, it's so irritating. Almiron worked hard tonight as always but his lack of quality was massively exposed. That run behind the offside line just before he went off was absolutely brain dead. Shame Murphy wasn't available cos I'd have had him on after an hour, his directness would have been useful. Feel like we generally defended well against Haaland. Foden is the new Ozil in that he'll turn up against us twice every year but do little else of consequence in most games, the little fuck. The goal I thought Joelinton looked leggy and was slow to get back, and there was too big a gap for him to hit the shit through. Bit annoying cos they didn't really have anything else clear cut. Anderson looked bright when he came on, he deserves to be in serious contention for Liverpool. Good to have this one out of the way and if that performance gives us the confidence to beat that whinging German cunt next week then I'll gladly accept tonight. There's not a team I want to beat more this season than Liverpool.

Can't wait to see that shit haircut gormless cunt Foden fail to produce for England time after time over the next decade whilst he looks like the spawn of Maradona against us every sodding time.

Fuck off Miggy. Absolutely brain dead.

Why is it at the Etihad whenever we get chances our players lose all the ability they show week in, week out? I fucking hate this place me.

Miggy's having a hard time here. Play the fucking overlap FFS man.

Feel like Almiron's lack of quality is really hurting us here. We're getting plenty of the ball down that right flank and it's fizzling out into nothing, bar that cross Trippier got across a minute or two ago. Good goal by City but Alvarez had far too much space to line the shot up; Joelinton slow to get back and too much space between Burn and the centre backs. Foden is fast turning into one of those players who saves their best top drawer performances for when we play them. Bit like Ozil used to for Arsenal.

Joelinton way too slow to get back to Alvarez. Great finish but he had far too much time and space to line that shot up.

Mason Nowt having another spectacular, action packed game I see.

Class win that for the Heed. Got them to finish top 7 in my main antepost bet this season so hope they continue to build on a steady start