Jack Flash

2's and 3's all round for me apart from Captain Costa and Lieutenant Oscar. Such a good feeling when your captain is banging them in before half time.

5 goals and 7 assists for Downing now. Might have been good enough for us after all?

Nolan Hat-trick - 100/1. He's due one.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/west-ham-0-0-newcastle-alan-1871681 Good times.

Cancelled mine after the first 3-0. You could actually feel the iceberg hit the club when the 3rd one went in.

People keep saying the first bit like it actually means something. Stuart Pearce is botting him up his ginger arse on BBC 1 as we speak.

Aye, we need 10 mins of fancy graphics and discussion on it.

Just ahead of Gary Monk. Oh look here's Swansea now...

Dwight Gayle is very underrated. His goals per minute at Palace is ridic.

http://i.imgur.com/hPiQc0O.png Next 3 games are beyond vital.

http://i.imgur.com/rI7XvnS.png A season (league only) lasts 3420 mins so the number sluts can work out his average though it appears to be good. For context, Remy got 14 in 2097 mins for us last year. Also worth noting is their insane home fixtures http://i.imgur.com/A0xWPmE.png If he's motivated he'll score goals.

Is it common knowledge that Shola Ama pretends to be Ameobi on twitter? http://i.imgur.com/ztlomU9.png

Aye, he can actually use the ball effectively instead of just running around like most of his peers do.

yarked bruce aswel tho m8 propr bad un

Trevor Morley. Could include Ian Bishop if we get desperate.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/football/teams/england/10381650/England-seal-2014-World-Cup-final-spot-and-could-Ravel-Morrison-be-Roy-Hodgsons-wildcard.html That was from just over a year ago. He made a really big impact from only 20 or so games.

"after beating cancer" What a club.

Exact same thing happened last year. As you say it speaks volumes.

The only players we've sold (for money) under Pardew were Carroll, Nolan, Routledge, Enrique, Best, Forster, Ba, Perch, Cabaye and Debuchy. Also Lua-Lua, Amalfitano and Tavernier but for pennies. Nowhere near as bad as Pardew would have us believe. If you look at the non-fringe list of those we sold, Nolan, Enrique, Debuchy were all replaced by equal or superior players (Cabaye, Santon, Janmaat) during the same transfer window. Ba and Carroll were also adequately replaced in subsequent windows with Remy and Ba. You could also argue that Perez could be better than Remy so that is Remy replaced too. So that leaves only Cabaye and to be honest Pardew got Colback instead who is who he wanted. We even replaced Ben Arfa with Cabella if you consider HBA was surplus to requirements. So the only good player we haven't adequately replaced is MYM and Pardew thought he was shite. There's also De Jong, Ferreyra and Riviere. 2 of them haven't worked out but they still might under a manager who is a human being. Though it could be argued the 2 strikers have replaced Shola and L. De Jong very well.

We're that good.

Nice v Marseille added to BT Sport on 23rd Jan so he's (possibly) on this Friday and next Friday

Bonus points for this

He's got a lot more genuine talent than most English players his age. It's a bit of a cliché but if someone can get him to mature off the field he'd be an excellent signing.

Bob De Bilde is a striker. Possibly loads of full backs too.

http://i.imgur.com/0Uo6qw0.jpg