Alan Pardew

Young Eddie will expose the Portuguese fraud. 3-1 with a goal from West Germany’s Woltemade.

I believe Woltemade can win the World Cup for West Germany.

That Livramentro is worse than Wan Bissaka going forward. Pep interested? The King has doubts.

I believe Young Eddie gets a win tonight. Another semifinal for him.

Awful game this. Bottle of red for me. 6 year contract price range I think.

This Inter side seems incapable of playing on the front foot. Very poor so far.

YYYYYYEEEEEEEESSSSS LADS. Great win for Young Eddie. Fucking old cunt!!!

That Simons has been a bigger waste of money than that Adam Elanga. None of them able to play on the front foot.

11 minutes lads. Young Eddie to get at least a point here I reckon.

Never a penalty that lads.

Technically some of the worst football I’ve seen this PL season lads. And I’ve seen my fair share of shite.

Awful game so far lads. I enjoyed watching Young Eddie getting another three points in the CL the other night. Bottle of red for me later I think. Probably Italian.

That Wirtz can’t hit a barn door.

Fucking old cunts!

YYYYYEEEEEEEESSS LADS!

YYEESSSS LADS. I think you lot can win the league to be frank. That Woltemade… he come in, and has immediately given that extra quality on the ball that you want as a manager, so you can play on the front foot. I think Young Eddie will be pleased.

That Wirtz playing like Vurnon Anita again lads. Not a good buy so far.

Floated corners lads. It’s the key.

YYYYYEEEESSSSSSS LADS. The return of the King.

I predict Young Eddie will grab a 2-1 win today.

Awful game lads. I’m opening a good red later tonight. Probably Italian.

I should apply for the Rangers job I think. Yes lads!!

YYYYYYYEEEEEEESSS LADS!

Yes lads!! How about that Alisha Lehmann??

Some good players in your squad but it’s still riddled with League One and Championship plodders as well. It’s a miracle what Young Eddie did last season. What a manager he is.