Alan Pardew

What a player that Anders Isak is. Better than Rivierre.

Imagine the King… back for one last dance up north. Back on the pitch… managing… I think you lot would go mental and not in a good way. I do believe I could get a nice win streak going with these players. Some good ones come through these past years. That Tino Guimaraes is some midfielder. Much much better than the cloggers I got 5th with. Even won manager of the year. That being said I think Young Eddie deserves more time this season before we can ponder on such things. He come in… and saved you from relegation after the mess Fat Bruce left you in. Then he got you CL football. No job for me yet lads… but I push on. Liverpool - City later tonight on the telly. Glass of wine for me probably.

YYYEESSS LADS I’m applying for the job! Having a nice glass of wine tonight.

We should be playing on the front foot with these players. Should i apply for the job lads?

Thank you for the kind words lads. See ya later.

Not sure why you’ve tagged The King here but I’m reminded of our massive 3-0 win over Manchester United. Good memories. Glass of wine for me now. See ya later lads.

YYYYEEEEESSS LADS WHAT A VIDEO THAT IS. We got 5th and won all those games. And we nearly won the Europa League the next season. What a great time.

YYEEESSS LADS I remember it clear as day. We got 5th and won all those games playing on the front foot. Lost quite a few too but you have to take the good with the bad.

YYYYYEEEEESSSS LADS. That’s how you win games. Bring on fullbacks!! I believe young Eddie was inspired by The King today. Another three points from me to you lot. Bottle of wine for me now. See ya later lads.

YYYYYEEESSSS LADS. Now I’ll happily admit that the 4-0 loss to Southampton was not my finest hour but then we went on a massive winning streak and we were back to 5th just like that magical season. Unlucky I thought against West Ham and Burnley to not come away with even more points. Who knows what would have happened had I stayed. Certainly wouldn’t have been relegated like the balding McClaren. See ya later !!

YYYYYYYEEEESSS LADS. Young Eddie and The King tearing up the league. He got 4th but didn’t win Manager Of The Year. I got 5th but won Manager Of The Year. See ya later.

YEEES LADS!! Money for you lot and I got to go back to London. I guess one can say the well had dried up at that point. You lot were tired of me and I was getting a bit fed up as well I must say with all the complaining and constant noise lads - So again I made something work for you lot. Remember when we thrashed Stoke 5-1? Good times. Though I will say this lads... When I left you were INSTANTLY relegated with a squad much the same as mine but with Wijnaldum. Never forget that lads. I made the wheels turn here because I knew how to navigate the Prem better than most other managers at midtable clubs. Because I was and am the KING. Ashley was never my mate, I could never escape that rumour. Hell he bought me Vurnon Anita to replace Cabaye lads...! How can you think that? Just had an amazing Pinot Nero wine lads - from a small and upcoming Italian vineyard. 74 quid a bottle well fucking worth it lads. You haven't heard of it. See ya later!

Ipswich keeper having a mare against City. You lot would do well to loan them one now that you have about 10 of them. Prefer fullbacks myself.

I’m sure that Tapsoda is an excellent player. Mbiwa lacked key elements in his game to really make it for us. See ya later.

Hardly my fault you lot couldn’t get excited for our magnificent wins. Remember when we won 5 in a row in October-November 2014? Good times lads. Leicester, Liverpool, Tottenham, WBA and QPR all beaten with us conceding just 2 goals. What a run lads. And that’s excluding the cup win against city away. So actually 6. Pelegrínni.. fucking old cunt. See ya later.

YYYYYYYEEEEEEEESSSSS LADS!

Give me three weeks with that Fulham team and I would have them winning five games in a row. Probably go on to lose six in a row after and then win another four. see ya later lads.

They’ve had two massive chances but that Fernandes just didn’t come through for them

Yeeeeees lads. The Premier League is finally back.

We had many cloggers lads. And we still got 5th! have a nice Sunday.

YYYYYEEEEEEEEESSSSS LADS. The King is out here still getting you lot new fans. Now of course I did massively regret what I did at the time but it looks like it’s worked out great for everyone in the long run. Great win against Hull as well on the day. Good times lads. lunch time for me soon lads. I’ll be having everything. see ya later.

I’ve been working lads. Here’s my latest video. still hoping someone comes through for me with a job. The King back on the pitch. I’d take one of the top League One clubs as well I’ll tell ya that much. See ya later lads.

Gareth told me this lad is planning on staying. Good news for you lot, you can never have too many fullbacks in my opinion. see ya later.

It worked plenty of times lads. Just because the immediate thing to happen isn’t a goal doesn’t mean it’s ineffective. Gives the opposing team something to think about. Remember when we got 5th place? Good times.

Thank you Lee for the encouraging words. Sorry it didn’t work out for you at Forest. Let me know if you go some place else and if they need a manager