Taylor Swift Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 All right, since Dan fucked it up last year, I'm back on the job. We're doing this again, and the aim is 4th. Forget about all the shit off the pitch. None of that counts. We've had shit summers and great seasons before and great summers and shit seasons before, too. Yeah, it's a dream but if you ain't dreaming, you ain't living. On the pitch, we have Hatem, Colo, Krul and Papiss. Anything can happen. Three untouchables this year: City, Chelsea and Man Utd. Our competitors: Liverpool, Arsenal and Spurs. The final target: 69 points and CL. The home target: 13 wins against everyone else, which gives us 39 points. Three more for draws against our competitors and three for draws against the untouchables. 45 points at home. 13-6-0. The away target: Defeats to the three bigs, draws against the three aforementioned. Three victories against the promoted teams takes us to 57 in total. Then 9 draws takes us to 66 points. And a win away to Stoke takes us 69. It's arbitrary but fuck it. Let's see how it goes. 4-12-3. 24 away points. Gameweek 1 Expectations Newcastle 0 Arsenal 3 Liverpool 3 Spurs 3 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
SEMTEX Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 I learned that stats are fucking pointless and gave up like a trooper. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taylor Swift Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 You fucked up our whole season. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChrisJbarnes Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Disco Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 Any reason why Everton despite having a stronger squad currently than last season aren't involved in this statistical delusion of grandeur? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taylor Swift Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 I couldn't fit them into the formula. So fuck them. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 Last time someone asked if a 1 had been missed from the thread title. I think this applies once again. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Venkman Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 the fuck? Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unbelievable Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 I love this forum Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mole_Toonfan Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 Last time someone asked if a 1 had been missed from the thread title. I think this applies once again. Battle for 4th from bottom tbh. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decky Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 This would be more interesting (realistic) if it was a race for 4th from bottom. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trumpet Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 Arsenal will get it as per usual (despite my wishful hopeful thought of Manc internal implosion under Moyes) Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Benwell Lad Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 Three defeats all season Be lucky to reach October with just three. Anyway that aside love this thread. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taylor Swift Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 We're not going to battle for survival you pussies. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrettNUFC Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 I love this thread. I can feel the optimism flowing through my veins. It feels good. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Belfast Mags Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
henke Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 Dude I wish I had your optimism. If I started this thread it would be the battle for 4th bottom. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdckelly Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 bit early for our championship campaign for 4th Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dinho lad Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 bit early for our championship campaign for 4th http://i.imgur.com/5039uJt.png Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hydeous Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 Battle for 4th!! You have my full support (and my sympathies). 0 points this weekend. Completely supporting this hypothesis. HWTL! Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Belfast Mags Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 Pip lad Fair play to you, you've made my day, and I'm not even joking. 4th place finish deal me in Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jill Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 http://www.dorkatorium.co.uk/pictures/cliff.jpg Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teasy Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 A positive thread on this forum? Get ready for it to be pissed on from a great height. Edit: See it already has been. Good thread anyway, even if it is a bit mad its refreshing to have just one that isnt about doom and gloom. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jimburst Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 Absolute shanter in here, lads. Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mole_Toonfan Posted August 16, 2013 Share Posted August 16, 2013 There's positivity and then there's utter delusion Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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