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Just for the sake of something slightly different to talk about. I'm sure there'll be some crossover but this isn't intended as another way to list all the things wrong with the club; so feel free to completely avoid phrases like "Steve Bruce is [insert warranted insult]," or "fans shouldn't go to the game."

SO, if a takeover happened tomorrow, and you had the ears of the new, ambitious owners - and they were determined to work with the fans and deliver as much as they realistically could - what would you ask for? Anything you like; obvious or niche, widespread or personal. I'll start with an obvious one and a more thoughtful one: A; replace the manager and B; (a return to?) facilitating screenings of matches in the community. 

Immediate edit: Fuck it, why not expand it to football on the whole. 

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Sack Bruce

Appoint Rafa

Give Rafa absolute control of all resources available at your disposal. Trust him 100%.

Beg Keegan to take an ambassadorial role at the club.

Employ Hatem to run the academy. 

Commission an independent review of the Gallowgate puddle.

Sit back, enjoy a cigar and watch the good times roll.

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Rafa back.

Reasonable investment into the squad.

Investment into SJP to make it shine again, possibly a Gallowgate extension? Bring back the original sign on the East stand. Use it for bids to host Champions League/Europa League finals and other events, concerts, boxing matches, NFL?

Significant investment into the training ground and academy. I’d build a new site, similar to Man City’s. Have a smaller stadium for academy games, women’s games, possibly have that stadium in Gateshead and ground share with Gateshead?

As for the training ground and academy. Have it so it’s a complex. Have it so there is a school for the academy kids so they can have their training incorporated with their education. If they want to drop out or won’t make it, give them options to get into coaching/management, refereeing etc. If they still want to drop out of football give them the offer of staying in the academy school but without being required to do the football side of training. Have the school and academy mixed genders as well. So we can have young female players coming through the academy as well.

At the training ground have a housing estate for the coaching staff and players so they can live together on the camp. They can have 24 hour access to the facilities. Have a little residents park and such so the families can gather, and obviously make it a gated community with security to keep the players safe. On top of this have a 5 star hotel on the campus so away teams can be based there and it would help with Newcastle hosting events, especially football events. It could allow us to house officials etc for said events.

Have a network of other clubs across the country and world. I’m not saying we have to do what Man City have done and buy clubs and possibly change their identity to ours, but at least have a connection so we can maximise our scouting and player development abilities.

Communicate with the fans so we are informed about the clubs plans, what direction we are heading in, and also so they know how we feel and what we think will and won’t work.




Edited by Stifler

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Sack Bruce.

Appoint a top class ambitious manager, try and entice Allegri or get Rafa back.

Invest in the/build a new training ground.

Scrap the current academy setup and build top class facilities and put in place a youth system that looks after the young players in the case of injuries etc, and a platform that actually gives them a chance here instead of loaning them out ad infinitum until they reach 23, 24 before fucking them off. Take a leaf out of Arsenal's youth system.

Invest in the playing staff year on year to build an entertaining side that the fans can be proud of.

Invest in SJP: clean up and modernise the ground inside and out and bring it into the 2020s. Try to get the Strawberry Place land back in order to expand, whether possible or not I don't know.

Put a competent director in place who can grow the club commercially back to its full potential.



Edited by HaydnNUFC

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Dump Steve Bruce and replace him with Rafa to steady the ship and start over again.

Get rid of all the crap/hanger on players goes without saying.

Invest in the academy, training ground and of course St James' Park.

Have a singing end with safe standing.


Change the stupid handball rule.

A complete revamp of VAR and limit its actions. 

Bring back the advancement of free -kicks for dissent.

Players agents should be paid by the player not the football club.







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An even remotely respectable youth set up for the size of the region would be a start. 

The number of talented youngsters we’ve had come through since that fat abortion bought us has been nothing short of embarrassing 

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In regards to football as a whole

Scrap VAR. Its fucking shit.

Try and put a stop to or scrap this Champions League Swiss bollocks.

Introduce a system where fans can pay an extra fee or for an extra subscription to a broadcaster where they can watch their teams' 3pm games or games that aren't on terrestrial television. 

Scrap agents fees or place a levy on them. Just do something to reduce their power in the modern game.

There'll be more but they aren't on the top of my head rn.

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1. Replace manager & let him bring in whomever he wants within whatever budget is available for coaching staff & players 

2. Wash St. James' Park

3. Improve training facilities

4. Improve youth facilities

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Bring back the UEFA Cup as a straight knockout competition

Allocate 2 of our CL places to the winners of the cups.

Allow quick free kicks

Go back to having the linesman raise his flag straight away for an offside. None of this waiting bollocks



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World Cup

Back to 32 teams, transparent voting system for host which is loosely rotated across the world. Only countries with a suitable human index score can apply. 


Broadcast on new terrestrial TV sports channels

Large % of prize money goes to FAs to distribute to all clubs they oversee and youth projects

CL format to stay as is but no more than 3 clubs from a league with 3rd club having to use playoffs with peers. Replace with more domestic champions as leagues hopefully become more even. No seeding.

Uefa Cup made straight knockout but with more teams, no seeding.

Continental tyres reinstated as showcase CL sponsor 


Broadcast on new terrestrial TV sports channels

No state ownership allowed

No multi-club ownership

Fairer income distribution down pyramid 

Clubs only allowed to own / register x number of players at each age level to reduce need for loans / hoarding talent

All clubs to have a standing home end which is directly next to the away section

Fan representation on all clubs boards with key decisions going to fan (ST holder) vote

VAR time limited and video ref can watch twice at real time speed, look to fuck off in long term

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Some really interesting shouts in here like. Particularly a fan of anything which really integrates the club back into the community. Surely there's more that could be done there. Can anyone verify my shout about them showing games in the community during thy Keegan days? Feel like I can recall my dad mentioning it. 

It would be incredible if the club could set up some kind of grants process, maybe in partnership with the Council to make sure any regulatory stuff was checked-off. Sports clubs around the region could apply for funding which came directly from the club; even if it was just hundreds of pounds, as opposed to anything extravagant - it would just mean building bridges and relationships, and starting to behave like the sporting apex for the region like it should be. Successful applicants would get moneys but it'd also make for some great PR for us; with us wheeling out Haaland and Mbappe with the big cheques and cutting ribbons and ruffling kids' hairs etc. Would literally just mean budgeting about £50grand a year, plus wages, and would make a colossal difference. 

Mick Martin raised some interesting points about the commercial side of the club recently; about how, true to form, the staff appointed to significant positions didn't have anywhere near the right sort of credentials. So some better appointments in that department would appear to go without saying. 

Just generally, expand the operation to create a few more local jobs. 

Put the old letters back on the East Stand. 

Dunno if this sort of thing is possible these days but would be nice to have some fan involvement in kit design/selection. Aside from that, I'd happily just take a move from Puma to pretty much any of the other big'uns; Umbro, Nike, Adidas, NB. 

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Sack Bruce. 

Give SJP a good spruce up. 

New training ground.

set up a scouting network focusing on the next crop of north east and Scottish players. We should be making use of being the main club for 200 miles from Leeds up to Edinburgh.

Also what’s with our latest badge in black and white it looks awful! Bring back the colour badge!

brown ale or a north east company back as shirt sponsor. 

Nine bar back to Shearers! 


football in general wise 

Champions league back on ITV.

FA cup semis at neutral grounds

Top 2 get champions league. 3rd and 4th europa league and the fa cup and league cup winners get Europa league then it would give more value to our domestic cups again.  

Stop giving fouls for “contact” and having the game stop for the slightest touch every 15 seconds.

Every 23 man PL squad has to contain a minimum of 4 players from the clubs academy. 



Edited by CalmintheChaos

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Yeah what even is it? Like some hologram or something? It just looks tatty and awful. Keeping with the theme of the rest of the club I suppose. Also proper black and white stripes on our home kit. This seasons has been a lot better in that regard but recent years it’s just been a black block and 2 white blocks like some West Brom kit or something. All these are just such small little things and good PR wins for any owner who gave a f*** 

I do like the red numbers and lettering we have on the back of our tops though nice retro feel to it and looks smart. The 18/19 home strip with white socks and the red lettering looked smart. Also our away kits should be yellow top and green shorts like the early 90s and/or the 95/96 and 2018 maroon hoops that was so good. Also Adidas back as kit sponsor as our current tops look like something of one of them dodgy shops on holiday.  



Edited by CalmintheChaos

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20 hours ago, HaydnNUFC said:

In regards to football as a whole

Scrap VAR. Its fucking shit.

Try and put a stop to or scrap this Champions League Swiss bollocks.

Introduce a system where fans can pay an extra fee or for an extra subscription to a broadcaster where they can watch their teams' 3pm games or games that aren't on terrestrial television. 

Scrap agents fees or place a levy on them. Just do something to reduce their power in the modern game.

There'll be more but they aren't on the top of my head rn.

Another, stop clubs being contractually obliged to wear change kits x amount of times when there is no clash. We can go to Leeds and Spurs wearing black and white.

Also changing NINE back to Shearer's is a good shout, but actually make it a good bar instead of a shit version of an already shit Shark Club. 



Edited by HaydnNUFC

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  1. Renovate and expand the stadium
  2. Revamp all commercial partnerships 
  3. New training center for 1st team, academy
  4. Become completely in sync with the community, be a driving force
  5. Honor, enshrine the legends, rename stands and/or add statues (esp for Keegan) 
  6. Get Keegan and Shearer involved in the club
  7. Honor the Robson family permanently, in addition to the statue 
  8. Get a technical partner in Nike, Adidas or Umbro 
  9. Get a fuck off shirt sponsor who will pour in a ton of money into the club 
  10. Build better ties with international fanbase



  1. Abolish this CL Swiss cheese bull shit 
  2. Fuck off the UK TV rights black outs and allow fans to watch from home, we're living in a different time now - even if it means they pay for additional channels 
  3. Clear up Owners & Directors bull shit and apply it properly each year
  4. Don't allow owners to ruin clubs - ala Mike Ashley and other clubs who have suffered. It's the Fans who have suffered
  5. State ownership is OK, but require additional recourse and/or same recourse to all owners who fail to steward clubs respectfully 
  6. Stop putting rights holders before fans
  7. Stop putting "match going" fans before those who are just fans in general 
  8. Cancel Steve Bruce for good. 
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  • 4 weeks later...

If the Saudi takeover happens I’d like to see the following happen 

1: new state of the art training ground

2: Replace Bruce with either Rafa, Allegri, Gasperini, Schmidt, Potter, Alonso, in that order of preference.

3: Luis Campos as D:O:F, blokes a genius.

4: Bring Peter Kenton to run the financial side of the club

4: bring all boys clubs in the north east with possible exceptions of those in Sunderland and Middlesbrough under the NUFC umbrella. 

5: pay to improve grassroots facilities and coaching throughout the north east. Everyone born in they north East should be offered to have coaching badges paid for by the club.

6: look in to stadium expansion, or whether or not the club would have to move to a new site such as down near the river.

7: allow Nust to buy as much stake in the club as they can afford.

8: invest heavily in NUFC trust with particular focus on support for homelessness, perhaps building new homes.

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