Theregulars

Stick to Swindon, Jan.

Literally advertising for the gnonce, just a multi-layered corruption lasagne. Sigh. Seemingly another famous victory for the Scouse Victimhood Circlejerk Association, brought to you by Redbird Capital.

Think he wore 27 at Bremen.

I really want to think that his game will regress without Howe's coaching and it will end up being a memorable overpay, but I do also think he's fucking legit. The reality is that none of the outcomes are good, so I can see why a case for huge transfer fee and remove toxic presence is plausible.

Brexit means Brexit

Move on or move in? Log on or tune in.

Not possible to do so lawfully, for all those who keep suggesting a Turkish/Saudi/Russian exile. If exile is our choice then it’s keeping registration but isolating and not playing.

The horrible reality is that we’re almost certainly going to need him, so we’re almost certainly going to have to entice him to do what he already agreed to by paying him more in return for doing nothing and making choices which would (somewhere between feasibly and obviously) undermine both our preparations for and start of a massive season. It’s now time for cooler and pragmatic heads to prevail, but no fan is going to forget this situation where we outplayed the champions he twerked at and he was sat at home behaving like an adolescent who didn’t get the toy he expected for Christmas. To throw a further sickener in, if he does come back it actively undermines the rest of the team who have been everything we’ve come to expect and more, so realistically we’re going to have to get behind him. If there is a reasonable and morally conscious human being in there, then at this moment in time at some level he must be feeling guilty and ashamed. To skidmark what should be one of your life’s greatest memories is so, so unnecessary and sad. This is the “product” for which we all pay through the nose and on which so many people’s active happiness seemingly depends. I say this as someone irretrievably obsessed with it but there is so much of it that isn’t sporting or about real sporting endeavour that it sometimes takes unrealistic amounts of cognitive dissonance to believe in it. In the same way that politicians don’t hide the cheating anymore, nor do the PL/UEFA/FIFA/cartel. Cheers, bellend.

It was a two-footed scissor on Bruno’s standing leg from behind. It’s dictionary definition serious foul play

Well fucking played. We’ll finish above these overrated cheaters.

Maybe we didn’t want Barry. Come on Antoine, hop on the Jørgmøbile! Think of the way we can call it a Jørgerbomb if he scores a thunderbastard

Dunno like, they’re being pretty clear about their views that Isak is staying and the signing will replace Wilson.

I think we’ve been what we are, which is without an adequate back room structure, but to me it looks we’ve tried pretty hard to improve the team within our needlessly restricted means

You’ve forgotten “failure to move on”.

Oh lord won’t you buy me A move on klaxon my friends all have strikers Im left with Jackson

Given that they stated £60m publicly it seems strange that they'd accept this, but perhaps dialogue continuing is a good sign. Tantalisingly close to saving the Summer!

D-Von? Get the tables.

Money

And actually shows how ill-considered the strategy is, given that it actually actively undermines our ability to replace him. He’s thicker than I thought.

There are two things that make this really difficult to come back from, as I see it: 1. He has brazenly contravened a number of Howe’s foundational principles: unity of purpose, tightness of community, mutual respect and constant hard work. I think this is probably more or less the same at any club, but when you’re on the receiving end of the PSR cheating and still competing with the heavyweights then it becomes more important. It’s such a blatant infringement that it doesn’t seem realistic to let him play again anytime soon without players thinking that the rules don’t matter as much as they thought. 2. It shows that he either completely misunderstands - or much more likely doesn’t give any shade of shit about - the mentality of Newcastle as a region. Shying off from work and letting down your mates are not taken lightly on principle in a place that has depended on togetherness and communal solidarity to get through being constantly ignored and unsupported by those with the levers of power. The club is one of the main ways Geordies represent themselves to the outside world, and to have someone so publicly air needless dirty laundry is genuinely a complete disrespect to a region and people that have treated him like a prince. It is morally repugnant to do this to the people who have contributed so much to being what he is. Nonetheless, we also can’t be seen to allow ourselves to be pissed about like this. It’s imperative that we set a robust and lasting precedent that we do not capitulate to such blatantly obnoxious conduct. I also don’t think there is a realistic possibility of replacing him properly now, and it makes little sense to try before the Sporting Director arrives to work with Soapy. All I can see is a stalemate which underwhelms both parties. He may well play for us again but in a game of such fine margins his heart genuinely not being in it may prove problematic on a recurring basis. We will replace him in January or the summer, but every club will know that we are desperate, so on top of the Saudi tax there will also be the needy tax. It just seems so illogical to conclude that he has the character to show the humility and diligence necessary when he’s shown us quite comprehensively what he thinks of us in the grand scheme of things. What a bastard.

Fair play to them, that’s what a bountiful summer can do. Lots of positive sentiment. Will face sterner tests but that’s a great start.

4/5 of the way to a respectable and healthy window.

To be honest I think the whole “purple” thing doesn’t make a whole lot of sense - I’d say Trippier and Tonali are the only players we signed where a lot of football viewers knew they were top drawer. Isak was highly rated but hadn’t yet lived up to billing, Botman wasn’t seen as finished article, experts knew Bruno was mint but many of us hadn’t heard of him I thought. I don’t really think we buy purples, because of PSR and the cartel’s ability to offer better wages.

Wonder if Ten Hag fancies Højlund again…

Isak to basement