Chris_R

Those comments alone should be grounds for dismissal under some kind of "gross misconduct" charge. I mean seriously, this is a man who is a striker yet his goalscoring exploits are quite genuinely about on a par with goalkeepers Jose Chilavert and Rene Higuita. Yet Pardew wants to give him a new contract. How shit does he have to be to get binned off? How much does Pardew value effort and getting stuck in above actual, real talent? Utter shitstain our manager is. Utter shitstain.

Watched 10 minutes of that and it's enough. The sheer passion, belief, positivity and desire of the man are such a juxtaposition with our current incumbent that it makes me want to cry.

Any one of those three is enough for me to declare myself done.

Why does he not want to stay and help us win 8th? Wot

And let's face it, Pardew needs the bullet.

Moyes and Pardew both play the same kind of anti-football though. Moyes might do it a little better, but it'd still just be more of the same.

Martin Allen is welcome to suck the cheese off my helmet, the utter fucking melt that he is.

The equation is depressingly simple for me. In the summer, Mike Ashley has to decide: Pardew or Ben Arfa. That really ought to be the single easiest decision that any human being has ever had to make in the history of time. However I am spectacularly confident that, like nearly every football decision he has ever had to make, he'll fuck this one up as well.

Incredible how he is still here. Just incredible. The damage he is doing to the club, the reputation of the club, and the players form and value is just unreal. If he starts next season as our manager, he's unsackable. Either way, not one more penny from me to this regime until he's gone, and as I've said before that includes sky. . Something which I'm finding depressingly easy so far.

To think we could well finish below crystal palace.

Needs to go so we can get someone in to make use of the players we have. Ben arfa, Marveaux, Cisse, Colo, Debuchy, Santon, Sissoko, Krul, Tiote. Not suggesting we should be top of the league but fuck me we should be worrying teams a lot more than we are, cowering and feelingafraid of fucking Swansea. Teams like that should be put to the sword, not afforded the freedom of the city. There's no certainties in football, but that should be our intention. Instead we just hear from pardew how good the opposition is. Utter coward.

Pardew safe, new contract for Shola. I feel disgusting.

Whilst I am pleased that the press, local and national, are ramping up pressure on our cowardly, defensive fraud of a manager, I'm somewhat disappointed that they're listing all the wrong reasons. They seem to think we are wanting him out because of recent results. And maybe, for some supporters, that is the case. But I feel the majority want him out because of the way we play and the way he speaks about us. I could accept 9th if we were having a go at teams, trying to be better than them, though obviously I'd hope for higher. But I'd expect the manager to hope for higher as well, and to tell us that. We could easily be at least 9th with a decent brand of attacking football, instead we're the most horrid team to watch in the league with a manager who wants nothing other than to defend for 90 minutes and is terrified of losing. Meanwhile, he runs down the supporters' expectations and bigs up the opposition before the game has even kicked off. He won't let us see our best players, and when he does feel he has to drag them onto the pitch they are told to run in the wrong direction, back towards our own penalty area instead of towards the opposition. If I managed Newcastle (Yeah, I know. ) I'd tell Ben Arfa that if he even set foot in his own half for anything other than the kickoffs I'd fine him a week's wages. This man has talent, flair and pace. He can excite the fans and terrify the opposition. But only if he is allowed to do it by the manager. Putting him on the pitch, however often, is not enough if he is told to do the wrong things. Football is about entertainment. It is a spectacle, a release from the daily tedium of life. I watch football for enjoyment, for pleasure. When people call it "the beautiful game" they're not conjuring up images of players grafting hard, tracking back, putting tackles in and running round lots. No, it's beating your man, running at the opposition, firing in a shot or a cross, a deft flick or a neat bit of skill. All these things are alien to Alan Pardew's footballing mentality and they are the reason why, ultimately, we're utterly sick of watching his sides play. Results can mask bad performances for a while, like when we finished 5th, but they are not everything and are not guaranteed. Entertain me. That's what I want after a week at work. Talk us up, not the opposition. Make the players, and by association us as fans, feel tall and proud. Make me feel invincible, not afraid. Make me expectant, not fearful. Make the opposition worry about us rather than us worrying about them. Give me hope. Make me smile. And if you can't do that, fuck off.

Me neither. Tremendous words. Nobody goes to football to watch their team defend. We want action and excitement, not tracking back and getting stuck in.

Man, this is absolute f***ing gold. Gahaha, that's utterly priceless. Just 2 years later and this prick is wanking himself into a frenzy that we might get 8th and trying anything possible to get knocked out the cups as soon as he can. What an utterly fraudulent charlatan. Just fuck off Alan, you detestable prick, and take your cowardly, negative, defensive dirge with you as well.

A) I'm not enjoying football at the moment B) It's 2014. Nobody with half a brain cell should be shelling out £600+/year to watch stuff that's free online anyway C) I can get all the games online when Sky only show a handful of ours each year I refuse to prop up this corrupt regime in any way at all. They can get to fuck.

How many fucking transfer windows do you need ffs? Haven't people been saying "This summer/winter is the big test" for about 4 or 5 years now? And we've consistently done fuck all. I guess we'll do fuck all this summer beyond the bare minimum, then you'll be back on here telling us that January is the big test. Grow a spine and stop letting Ashley constantly ream you in the ass.

If Pardew had even a small amount of testicles about him, he'd have gone for something like this vs Stoke: Cisse Gouffran Ben Arfa Marveaux Anita Tiote Hiadara Coloccini MYM Santon Elliott ============================ Not the cowardly defensive shite he lined up with. And I'd attack with that, not fucking cower and spend 90 minutes running in the wrong direction. Get the wingers up past the wide forwards, not have the forwards tracking back past the wingers. 1 DM, not 2 or 3. Push up to half-way when in possession and get at them.

I know tons of people who have been doing jobs for donkeys years and are utterly shit at them. And most of them haven't been sacked repeatedly for underperformance either. Coaching badges mean fuck all, I mean professional footballers are renowned for being thick as mince, yet every single one of them seems to manage to get them. It's not like ex-footballers everywhere are resitting these exams repeatedly, everyone passes first time provided they turn up. It's just a money-making scheme for the FA and a way to keep management and coaching as a closed shop for ex-professionals so that Joe Public can't swan in and take one of their jobs.

If Pardew stays and Ben Arfa goes, I'm fucking done. No match tickets, no Sky TV, nothing that would send a single penny in the direction of anyone clueless, stupid or malicious enough to allow that to happen. Fuck them.

Heathrow terminal 5

It's a good job Gosling was on the end of that. Sure, he put it over, but Ben Arfa would have scored an own goal.

'Mon Stoke. Football is, as they say a funny old game and anything can happen between 2 sides no matter who the players or the line-up. The very worst thing that could happen for us is for us to somehow get a result with this. I just couldn't bear what it would mean for the future.

Depends what team he puts out. If he starts Ben Arfa and Marveaux (Ha, I know! ) then I hope we win. If he has both of them on the bench like the utter coward almost certainly will with Gosling playing again, then I hope we get humped in the face.

Hope we get fucking pummelled tomorrow. Anything to get rid of this shithead.