oldtype

Alright Ashley you can come off now, don't want to ruin your vacation with a niggly injury do you?

we'll need a win. Thank God for Guus Hiddink, at least.

That side is actually not too far removed from the one that drew 3-3 with Ranger, LuaLua and co. Fucking disgrace. Just watch Fergie's young pups roll over so Hull can fuck them in the ass.

that's the worst side Man U could have possibly fielded. No Ferdinand, Berbatov, Tevez, Anderson, fucking Nani is the only one in there who ever gets near the first team and Gary Nevil is playing at centre half. Jesus Christ, maybe Ferguson is actually thinking about letting Hull take this to fuck us over.

Apart from Beye, the only player out of the entire squad who's shown REAL attitude over the past few weeks. Deserves praise for that. Somebody needs to find him a position other than center back though Seriously, at what stage in his development did somebody decide to say "oy, thick lad with bad concentration and horrible decision-making, we're going to turn you into a center-half!"

Shit... I'm so tense, literally can't stand still. Should probably go out for a bite and then start hitting the drink.

I've got my alarm set at 10 and a bottle of Gin ready. I live on the tenth floor so I don't even have to get a gun in case I need to

he would be a useful squad player if we could ration his playing time instead of sticking him in their every single week like f***ing idiots. Aside from the passing, he's still got all the attributes of a passable DM when he's had two weeks rest.

Knowing our luck, Krul's nailed on to become Holland's #1 in 5 years time. Forster will probably have a career ending injury on his senior debut.

If they have brains they'll stay away from this one. So yeah, I expect both of them to be in the director's box at Villa Park.

Blatantly bottled it. Obviously just doesn't want to be on the pitch when we're relegated so he can distance himself from the disaster and preserve his market value.

why can't we just start Lovenkrands?

Same boat mate, I'd literally kill for one.

I promise not to throw projectiles at the Man U kids when they play in Seoul this summer if they beat Hull.

A black and white shot of Mike Ashley with "this relegation is sponsored by sportsdirect.com" on one side A black and white shot of Shearer with "HOPE" in big letters on the other.

It's the same damn mess. Ashley made it worse yeah, but we all know who kicked it off.

Wouldn't disagree too much with that assessment. Just remember to hand a few % to good 'ol Fred.

If I'm in the stadium, Newcastle do not win. Ever. Actually, now that I think about it they don't just not win, they lose.

It's quite simple, there are two options: Convince yourself that we've got no chance and spend the whole week miserable Or delude yourself for a week and keep the faith I find the latter preferable.

It's just bound to happen isn't it. Poetic justice as in Butt breaking his leg with a slide tackle for handing in a transfer request?

Agree with the first three.People seem to forget we would be no where without Keegan.Heading for the old third divison when he took over,2 seasons later 3rd in the premiership.Owens a w***** but there is 10 other players on the pitch I've never denied that Keegan gave all of this to us, but he's played an instrumental part it taking it all away too. Granted, this is probably an argument that will never be resolved. As for Owen, when there's a palpable lack of leadership in the changing room driving everyone's morale to the ground, it's quite obviously the money-grabbing useless want-away captain's fault.

It was never going to work out for him up here once we sacked Big Sam unfortunately. Just wish we didn't peddle him to a team that would end up being one of our relegation rivals.

If I had to choose a top 5: Freddy Shepherd, Graeme Souness, Mike Ashley, Kevin Keegan, Michael Owen

Where at? I might be headed over into the I-drive area around Disney - usually lots of British people in the pubs around those parts, there's bound to be a few Newcastle fans to suffer through it with. Boston

Damnit, some tout website has away end tickets up for 250 quid a piece. And I'm seriously considering it.