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Gooch throws them harder, but he can't make them fly on a low arc at wicked speed like Delap can. Onyewu's long throws are pretty much just corner kicks. (Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, just not as impressive as Delap)

The way our luck is going atm, a Boro CB brings down Martins in the box, the referee would probably give them a penalty. even if we got a pen there is no-one in our team i would be confident in stepping up and taking it. Strangely enough if Ameobi was playing I'd be more confident in him scoring it then any of the rest Then again Viduka is surely good at pens?? Nolan's pretty good at taking pens... ...just saying

Well yeah, I just mean it's been bloody ages since we scored from a speculative smash at goal. Cant actually remember the last goal scored by us from distance It was probably Emre against Reading 2006/2007. I kid you not. Can we get them to dress in Black and White stripes and then play Ryan Taylor?

Have UEFA institute a continent-wide salary cap. There are a lot of crappy rules in American sports but this is one part where they got it right. It would be kind of funny if the result is that all the good players will just move to the middle east.

Lupoli Wannabe Maradona in the making I see

I remember when Neil Mellor was supposed to be the next Michael Owen. Not much difference between them now. I know he's not our player but you shouldn't insult Neil Mellor like that

I've always wondered, would it be such a bad idea to give the UEFA cup winners a spot in the Champions League the following season? They are "champions" after all and it seems like a better way of giving the competition some meaning than some funky name change.

Steven Taylor back could make a huge difference. Shit defender, but he's probably more likely to score a goal than any of our forwards are.

Nah, it was actually a lot worse. Heskey started going down five yards outside of the box and then slowly dragged himself inside for what felt like about five seconds.

Load of hogwash that article. No way Jonas plays in the Championship, period. Same for Bassong and Enrique. I'm relatively sure Steven Taylor would leave as well if someone hands him a sizable contract and whispers in his ear that he could make the England squad if he plays consistently in the Premiership next season. The reality is going down to the Championship will leave us with the absolute worst of the current squad (Ameobi, Butt, Duff, Smith, Geremi) along with the reserves. There will be a whole lot of holes where bodies will have to come in and limited funds to fill them. Barring some skillful wheeling and dealing in the market (and when's the last time we've ever done that ) we'd not only fail to come back up but potential disaster could be right around the corner.

You know what, aside from us going down this has probably been the most entertaining year of football in a long, long while.

I'd be shocked if you ever saw that ref again. I'd probably be furious if I were a Chelsea fan. As mentioned, he's already ready for the 2010 WC. A couple of Abramovich's "buddies" might be ready to have a word with him on his way to the airport...

I can sympathize with Drogba though. I'm happy Barca are going through but what the fuck does Chelsea have to do to get a penalty. Most of those calls weren't even borderline, they were blatantly obvious pens.

Chelsea could have had what, a hat-trick of penalties? What a joke. Not that I mind of course And the one time the ref actually did give them something (the red card) he was wrong!

shame this probably just means another trophy for Man United.

to be fair this has probably been the worst refereeing performance I've ever seen.

Barca are just going to get slaughtered by Man U in the finals though without half their backline.

EPIC. Cue 30,000 weeping people in Stamford Bridge.

We're all extremely grateful that all the fans of other clubs on the board have decided to engage in a vigorous debate about the nature of the division we'll be playing in next season.

Based on the fact he wasn't over the hill, washed up, unfit or past it. Based on he could dribble, cross, shoot, defend, score goals. Based on the fact he could get from Point A to Point B quickly and without needing a wheelchair. Other than that your stats are probably very relevant. Other than dribble (aimlessly towards the touchline like a headless chicken) he could do none of those things. "Defend" deserves a particular The fact that an ungrateful, sulking cunt like N'Zogbia is still so overrated by some despite the fact that he showed nothing but contempt for our club and its fans really, really makes me angry. Despite the spark he showed at the end of the 2005/2006 season, all he is is wasted potential and an inflated ego with the annual wondergoal thrown in. During the first half of this season Damien Duff, whom I fully acknowledge as a past-it useless piece of shit player, contributed 10x more. I really don't mind that we got a shit player like Ryan Taylor in return because 6m in itself was more than fair money for an overrated cunt with a horrible attitude.

What part of that back four is supposed to be unimpressive? I mean, Pepe's a nutjob yes, but other than that.

Fabregas doing his best Kevin Nolan impression today.

http://soccernet.espn.go.com/columns/story?id=641842&sec=global&root=global&cc=5901 Good news?

I hope it's not, so he's in the squad against Hull on the last day. Been very good for them this year.

If he was "noticeably raw" for Doncaster in the Championship I don't see how he's suddenly going to be making miracles for us in the Premiership.