Pilko

Really do think Stoke will go. They seem to insist on playing Jese up top and he just isn't getting goals. Their defence is pretty average nowadays too, they could normally bank on around 10 clean sheets a season to guarantee them 10-20 points but I don't see them getting so many this year. Do think NUFC will survive fairly comfortably too. We're only 7~ wins away from staying up as it is.

Palace, Swansea, Stoke

Great article that. Good to see Shelvey get a namecheck too.

Unless of course he meant to say that one of the longer serving lads told him that was what used to happen; Harper, Taylor, Shola etc.

Easiest league in the world the Champo. Leisure Suit Larry doing a better job than Rafa. Doing brilliantly to keep this shower of shite off the bottom of the league.

For the price we paid he's a useful option; he's no first choice though, which is what he's being played as at present.

It was a good cameo but let us not get carried away, starting him ffs

It almost seemed like he was having a contest with Joselu to see who could touch the ball the least. I like him and I've defended his inclusion this season but christ he was garbage today.

On 39 with Hegazy and Bertrand in-play, Bellerin and Kane © to come tomorrow. Not bad.

I bloody hate Diame with a passion but his introduction today was what we needed. Perez must have touched the ball about four times today.

Colossal. He's a fine player.

This is only 52,000 leaflets away from the famous paper dart game about 12 years ago.

We deserve to get beat here like. The only goalie in the league who's less mobile than Elliot and we've not tested him in 65 minutes.

Seemingly you could attack a Newcastle player with a sword or spear and be unlucky to recieve a yellow card or free kick awarded against you.

Bolton winning so only one point off the bottom as it stands

Same kind of tackle as Kane on Lejeune. Opposition players can do whatever they want against us.

Imagine sprinting over like that and not producing a red card fucking joke.

Atsu has looked absolutely hopeless so far like.

Fucking hell man, why is Merino being left out?

That's an absolute peach of a finish.

Varane o.g. so still in play surely?

Pardew would relegate that Leicester side for sure.

Fuck off Mahrez

Just placed mine in-play on 0-1 at 15/2

Chocolate from the fridge is the only way to have it tbh. Quite like certain types from the freezer; easter eggs or a Boost bar being the best ones for that.