Pilko

he'll probably be our new centre forward.

Deserves the ban, but I hope Phil Neville and the bent old cunts at the FA all get crippling knob rot.

We'll be "closed for business" save for peddling the bomb squad. No point having any other mindset.

"Our official sources can reveal that Mr Ashley requested 100% wage payment and Wolves requested 1% wage payment... we remind our viewers there is a 1% margin of error"

Not really, that's just how blinkered lights see it (you) Remember when Rooney nearly took that lad's head off (played for Wigan, forget exactly who) and they took no action? Players at every club do daft shit all the time, and Mitro is one of the worst for it; but we get punished precisely 100% of the time, whereas others don't.

One rule for us, another rule for the other 19 clubs in the division. Been that way for years. I fucking hate the media in this country, highlighting this for us but ignoring Mounie's 2 offences the other week.

Rumours circulating that he's had nothing but maggoty bread for three stinking days, and tried to eat the Norwich club doctor's legs cos "he won't need those".

Same. Fucking bastards!

Just the five players in the Premier League Team of the Week. That was a quiet night at Anfield...not! Klopp and Henderson in drunken night out shock horror, it says here.

Shelvey will be an unused sub and he'll fucking well like it.

Hennessey is bloody awful. Be better off standing a bottle of Hennessey between the posts.

I had a bit of a go at him cos his first three performances this season were peripheral to shite, but yesterday was more like the Ritchie we have seen a lot more often. Great energy utlised in the right places, with a sprinkling of quality. Hope he's now match fit and keeps it up.

All action stuff today. Had a blinder.

Has it been printed on A3 this week?

I never ever thought I'd say this, but can I hear more from Gareth please?

Not yet but that bet looks alright with 40 mins to go...

45:13 and it's 1-1

Knew I shouldn't have included fucking Everton They've had all of the possession and the goal was a fucking howitzer from nowhere. Plenty time for them to come back and win.

What a fucking goal by Hadjuk Split

He was fucking desperate, like. I can see why Rafa goes with Dummett, cos even with all of Paully D's limitations, he looks relatively assured at the art of defending. Lazaar's positioning was all over the shop.

Sigurdsson to score, over 2.5 goals, BTTS and Barry (Hadjuk) carded - 20/1

He was crap like. Has no clue when to offload the ball.

Looked hungry, strong and sharp. Great goal and assist. Start him Saturday IMO.

Darlow 5 - shite on that second goal Sterry 5 - I do like him but he had a stinker Mbemba 7 - canny again Hanley 3 - no pace, no brains, no idea Gamez 6 - gradually improved Aarons 8 - our best player and subbed...? Barlaser 7 - the pick of the three CMs, and subbed? Saivet 4 - dogshit Diame 4 - dogshit Murphy 3 - greedy and awful Mitrovic 6 - good goal, little else to note Lazaar 3 - fucking gash Hayden 5 - nowt wrong Ritchie 4 - poor Joselu 5 - ineffective

Horrible XI, then takes off Aarons and Barlaser who were the pick of the side and leaves on Murphy, Saivet anf Diame who were playing like they were on smack. Not sure what the idea is. Protesting with his team selection?