JeffJ

These keepers are fucking shite. Henderson looks tiny.

Think it was Mickey Mouse. Fitting.

We are going to love Bruno in three seasons when he’s playing up front.

Just grinned like a knacker for 3 minutes watching that! Lovely stuff. Roll on Tuesday night.

All the top teams have had the best British players. Players like Rice, Saka, Phillips, Ward Prowse, Lamptey, Gallagher, Abraham and Tierney would all be the right profile to grow with the club. The best thing is if we stay up then we will be in the picture for any player we want. Might not get them yet but we have the ambition and finance to compete. JUST FUCKING STAY UP.

‘I’m back, fully refreshed and ready for a new challenge after a very difficult time at Newcastle where I didn’t have the kind of support or funds the fella who relegated Bournemouth has been given. All I got was a lousy £8m pay off’ ’I’ve got a holiday booked in two weeks so Alex will be looking after the team, it’s just a shame my parents aren’t here to see how well he’s done’

Nah, got a Boro supporting mate who brings it up on a regular basis! ‘Aston Villa are ready to offer starlet Jack Grealish to Premier League Middlesbrough for striker Jordan Rhodes in a surprise cash-plus-player deal. Boss Steve Bruce, without a win in five games, is desperate to boost his firepower after seeing two bids for £10m-rated Rhodes, 26, rejected. Bruce wants Rhodes to play in a 4-4-2 line-up but Villa's new Chinese owner Dr Tony Xia is wary of complying with Financial Fair Play rules after already spending big. Grealish, 21, who shot to prominence in April 2015 helping Villa beat Liverpool in the FA Cup semi-final under Tim Sherwood, may now be sacrificed after openly frustrating Bruce this term. Bruce said the youngster was in danger of becoming a “circus act' by regularly complaining to referees’ 5 without a win 4-4-2 Blaming others

And tried to give Boro £10m & Grealish for Jordan Rhodes. He’s got an eye for a player like. Elmo must be buzzing.

Agnew and Clemence back on the gravy train too along with the son of Steve. Three Steve’s, Two Bruce’s. Poor WBA. Andy Carroll up top. 4-4-Fucking 2.

Missed off the JT Special - Getting your teammates girlfriend pregnant - Pay for Abortion and get him transferred.

…… At Accrington

I like the idea of a back three with those players, good balance, id say all three players are more comfortable in those positions than a two, provides cover for the wing backs and with Bruno sitting in front it should make it a lot tougher for teams to play straight through us. It would also get our best crosser of the ball higher up the pitch on the right. Still think we’ll play with a back 4 like. Either way. Just win. Don’t care how. Just win.

Sunderland representative Wee Phillie, an uber nonce nightmare of a marra forged in the white hot hatred of all things Newcastle. Got to give the Saudis so much credit for saving 1000’s of jobs in Teesside and reigniting the FTM industry in Wearside. Truly a friend and champion of the North East.

Lovely stuff. Puts Man Utd to even more shame, if that’s possible this week, over how they have handled Lingard. Fred the Red commented, “We couldn’t give a fuck about Jesse as he refused to sign a contract on reduced terms. We understand his reasons in wanting a move but we are scared shitless of West Ham taking our Europa League spot and even more terrified of the potential of Newcastle United so we would rather let him rot then walk away for free”

Burn that mother down. Another child orphaned.

Appalling way to treat a member of your staff. Should pay closer attention to their players needs on and off the pitch it would seem. Would save them money, reputation and prison visits.

‘They've broken the rules. Remove Christ from this flag as a matter of urgency’ Fucking Mags putting Christ the Reedeeyma on there. Worse than that Mussy Mosque, Marra.

Everton used up their two loans on El Ghazi and Dick Van Dyke from Salford Reserves so they have to buy Alli in some way. Mental instalments or whatever.

Rather let him rot and walk away for free in the summer than deal with present competition and potential future competition. Big club, small time mentality. Terrified of losing their place at the trough.

Can’t wait to sign Saka in the summer and get his social media to rub it in

Mackem lad I knew was convinced that Allardyce was going to take them into the top 6 until the FA offered him the England job. He absolutely despised the FA as they ‘fucked up their club’ and stole Allardyce. Bumped into him a few months ago in the Bodega in town and he still refuses to watch England games or FA Cup games because of it

One of the transfer nonces on SSN just said he’s getting calls on Origi moving tomorrow. Would make sense for Liverpool to shift him out now after signing Diaz and ACON nearly over.

They will roll out all the hits tonight for new manager - Allardyce, Di Canio, Baaaaally, Keane, Defoe, O’Shea, Stokoe’s statue, Sewper Kev, Steve Cram & Niall Quinn’s breathalyser.

Leave that to Mehrdad’s busy hands

That will bounce