Ronaldo

It's definitely a Spanish beer, it's just produced in the Philippines.

Carlo? No question about it. Hopefully just a matter of time before he's back in this country, hopefully as England manager.

He can 'spot a player' my left nut, like. Fucking Stifler from here could've recommended Cabaye and Ben Arfa. Every time his scouting abilities have actually been put to the test we've signed utter rubbish or players not right for the PL.

Carroll (and others) couldn't score enough to keep us up in 2009, but he took the league by storm after 12 months in the 2nd tier. Didn't Carroll get 3 goals from 5 starts in our relegation season?

One of the first things Rafa did at Liverpool was banish Mehfeee to Charlton. Fuck him.

TCD went fishing and I bit. I apologise. We need to rise above it. TCD, you are a creep.

What's your fucking point you creep?

Krul's almost as thick as Steven Taylor. They don't have the mental capacity to improve. Fuck them both off and don't look back.

Hart tries to take too much responsibility. It's admirable in a sense but the best goalkeepers don't get noticed as much as the armchair pundit would think because they make it look straightforward. They're always two steps ahead of the flight of the ball and subsequently either collect it relatively comfortably or take two steps back and are in position to make a save if needed. Seaman in his prime is the man to watch for this. Buffon too - he's been the best keeper on the planet for a decade but he doesn't let his ego cloud his judgment.

Exactly. To effectively win more games than you lose and draw combined speaks for itself.

It's a friendly a week after the season finished, man. Give over.

Dummett at LB pretty much is his style, though.

Christ will you shut up, man. Nah. You bash on about Rooney, which is far more of a joke to be fair. I said just the other day I'm not sure I'd start Rooney any longer.

Turkey's no.8 will be David Haye's next opponent if he keeps turning his back like that.

Christ will you shut up, man.

Ryder doesn't even know what's going on at our club, man.

Emery would be one hell of an appointment, like. I've thought for a while he'd do well in the PL.

To say he's been a waste of space for two years is stupid. He got 1 in 2 last season. His race has been run here, though.

Go give him a knock at least.

Does it fuck. You need Jose, Disco. You just haven't realised yet. He's a an even more tedious bellend than I am. It's pretty fucking close, but you're right.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYkE3vpWJjY

Take away Townsend's free kick 3 weeks back and I've not celebrated a goal like that since the World Cup.

Gaal, you have my permission to park du bush on thea gohllihne.

GET THE FUCKING FUCK IN.