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Completely fumbles his way through.

To be honest I've done a complete heel turn. I need more information about that time at school when Colback let a fellow pupil, who was in desperate need, borrow his pencil sharpener before I form a solid opion.

Blocked me on Twitter the other day, I imagine he's a nice bloke but he doesn't half talk some s****. What I mean. Gets himself so worked out when people call for HBA to return. It's comical at times.

I'm eagerly awaiting Skirge's response to it all.

Slim.

Love a Lee Stewart bump. What a fucking crumb.

Captain Marky Mark - people trafficker.

Fucking rubbish. Offers fuck all. Goes sideways more than a fucking crab and happily adheres to the Williamson back post routine. Embarrassing that people were bigging him up after one game. But he was canny at school so that's all that matters.

Watched it in the Cock and Lion with other London-based mags. Sincere apologies to the old bloke I seemingly offended by saying 'for f***s sake we're f***ed if we have to play that c*** any more this season' when Steven Taylor trotted on. I was bang out of order for my language and even more so for voicing an opinion that showed up someone so f***ing stupid who was trying to whoop and applaud the daft c***. Sorry that you know absolutely f*** all about football and buy into his fist pumping. Congrats on also loudly announcing that Gouffran 'had an excellent game' too, you f***ing crumb.

"But we woz gud against Man City!!!" Hahahaha we're showing ourselves up, man. Still as toothless as last season. It's pathetic.

The pair of them are fucked.

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Lose 2-0. At least one goal will be down to calamitous defending.

Adrian Chiles asks if Galatasaray and Fenerbahce fans will cheer on Besiktas. Divvy.

Peterborough sniffing around Marcus Maddison apparently. Will be a big blow.

Said I think we'll lose against Villa and the response was 'even if we do, it's still early days'

Got called 'Mr Negative' at work today because I struggled to find many positives from yesterday. Honestly man, so many people are happy to accept mediocrity.

Can't believe people are excusing him for that first goal because it was brilliant play by Dzeko. He had his back to goal, only one player needed to go to him, it's that simple.

Bump. Where do most Newcastle fans go nowadays? Will be down for the Villa game on Saturday.

That little Man Utd compilation was hilarious. Brilliantly edited to make them all look incredibly fickle.

Neil Cameron ‏@NeilCameron5 9m Ibrox is going to be Sports Direct Arena.com . That's so wrong.

Singles out a Man City player for praise - goes with Kolarov. Fucking loves left backs, does Pardle.

Williamson went with Dzeko for the first goal, Colo didn't have to go to him as well. He was done for the second, but Krul couldn't have palmed it back out into a better place tbf. No idea why he didn't push it out for a corner.

The 77 chances won't all be clear-cut passes, crosses and lay-offs either, man. If there's a scramble in the box from a corner, he sticks a foot out and indadvertedly tees up someone for a shot, that'll count. Not sure how it's that hard to fathom he created 77 chances last season.

I'd love to say I can't believe we're still trying this useless routine, however I can believe it. It's pathetic. Why bother thinking of something else?