Elbel1

I've had a quick look at Liverpools fixtures up to the next internationa nonsense and i reckon we're about to find out just how good Slott actually is. Chelsea - H Leipzig - A Arsenal - A Brighton (LC) - A Brighton - H Lederhosen - A Villa - H

Can't see Chelsea in the top 4. They were always going to start well but come Christmas unrest in the dressing room between the players who aren't getting the minutes they think they deserve will unrail their season

Micah Richards. Cursed with the build of an over inflated space hopper and the personality of an 8 year old with the keys to the Haribo factory. Thinks wearing glasses lend weight and credibility to his vacuous comments. Never before has one man so bought into the 'why be thoughtful and insightful when you can be loud and annoying?' approach to punditry.

Looks like he's lost it quite quickly. Quick enough for it to be health related as opposed to a new diet and exercise program.

Snapping? He'd have to do full 5 min standing ovation to get rid of something that big

How about a collection to send a forum representative to the meet and greet? The lucky winner turns up for the photo, launches into a tirade of personal abuse then leaves.

Out of interest, how strict will security be and will they be checking for firearms?

Rupert can fuck right off If there was ever an animated character that voted Tory it's that smug, checked trouser wearing fucker

I'm in this post and I don't like it

Depends on the dessert really Quite like the thought of retiring to an island made of cookie dough, surrounded by a sea of custard with pools of rice pudding or strawberry angel delight

Hope this helps everyone get over Captain Steak Bakes Tits

Shoe in for the John Candy role in a Cool Runnings reboot

Can you imagine the announcement video?

Douglas had his name on 2 articles in the i newspaper today about England chasing Howe today. The first carried an actual quote from Eales saying there is no release figure in Howes contract. The other one said there is a £5m release clause in his contract. Top drawer work there bonnie lad I'd be clearing a place on the sideboard for your Pultizer prize

Mbeumo Thiaw Tammy Abraham

From memory I think they walked away because of the potential betting issue

Ashworth met with Matt Hobbs who is a Wolves sporting director who's main remit is the first team I would suggest that it is unlikely that any other parents of academy players would be granted access to such a high ranking member of Wolves' management team If the meeting was about how his son was progessing surely the first point of contact would be someone who works with the academy players day to day and not a board member Of course none of the above proves he is in breach of contract but it does raise questions as to his motives

I'm guessing as part of his counselling he was encouraged to disclose any previous enfringements It's hard enough to beat an addiction without keeping secrets The first step to beat inner demons is being honest with yourself and the people around you

Mike Ashleys dad getting so pissed at Christmas 1963 he couldn't put on a condom

Fingers crossed

Ohhhhh no you wouldn't

Confident that I won't be the first to say this but Rob M on Twitter is comfortably the biggest bellend associated with the NUFC social media crowd

Really can't see Will Still and his brothers leaving 5th top Reims and his status as one of Europes upcoming coaches to risk it all at a midtable Championship side with a limited budget. Surely he'll have an eye out for a Premiership club or at least a Championship club with parachute payments and money to spend. Somewhere like Brentford, Brighton or West Ham when their current manangers move on. Possibly Burnley or Forest if they go down although the Forest job could be a challenge with the owner. For some reason I can see him rocking up at Crystal Palace and being a good fit.

I could definitely get behind that show just for the amount of sweepstakes I run at work. First gammon to have their hard drive checked First to be photographed with Farage First to stand in an election and lose their deposit First to have their marriage break down live on screen First to keel over with a cardiac while watching a trans rights debate on the Jeremy Vine show First to be have Dark Justice turn up on their doorstep during Coronation Street The possibilities are endless