Pilko

The Scouse wallpushing cunts were shite and got turned over by Fulham, Burnley and Brighton at home but you just know they'll decide to switch it on and routinely duff us 3 or 4 nowt like every other year, the wankers.

Robertson/Dallas 55/1 Thiago/Roberts 28/1 Dallas, Harrison, Milner, Gini 1+ SOT 72/1

McShite. Armstrong/Tielemans 2+ SOT 66/1 JWP/Pereira 2+ SOT 166/1 Fofana/Armstrong cards 33/1

McSauce now worth £400. Come on you snide little Jock fucker, get kicking.

McSauce and AWB 80/1

Anguissa yellow & SOT - 21/1

Daft one with a free fiver Semedo and Ait Nouri 2+ SOT - 366/1

City look limp as fuck, no zest or energy about them.

And now he books James for an identical foul when I don't have him fuck right off.

"When he plays well, we win" says Bruce. There's a huge part of the 2 wins in 22 for you, this cunt played basically every minute.

Is Mikey D having a fucking laugh? No card for Fernandinho there?!

Rodri/Chilwell cards 26/1 Silva/Laporte cards 28/1 Sterling/Mount 2+ SOT 32/1

He even manages to ruin it and piss everyone off on the odd occasion he scrapes a flukey win, what a cunt.

Tells you all you need to know about the standard of the league that our repugnant boiled ham in a tracksuit could get 2 wins in 20 and then suddenly back to back wins means we're virtually safe. Hope he's either fired or succumbs to gluttony ASAP.

Pathetic negative fat wanker, bailed out (again) by a player who by rights should have told the thick cunt where to go when he was dropped ahead of Shelvey.

That bottom one needed a Lingard goal for a shade over £900, fucking annoying

Soucek/Dummett 40/1 cards Lingard 4+ SOT 22/1 Joelinton & Soucek 2+ SOT 25/1 Dawson 1+ SOT, Lingard 2+ goals, West Ham 6+ corners and Shelvey card - 305/1

Zinchenko and Can cards 25/1

Stephen Carr.

Alaba 3+shots, Pavard 2+ shots - 42/1 Jesus Corona 2+ SOT, Mount 1+ SOT - 25/1 Mount & Pepe cards 22/1 Mount, Pepe, Kimpembe & Boateng cards 206/1

Lallana 2+ SOT 25/1 Lallana & Rodriguez 2+ SOT 188/1 Moder & Richarlison 2+ SOT 116/1

Siggy and Gross 90/1 if both play

Robinson and Redmond 2+ SOT 37/1 Vestegaard and Armstrong cards 85/1

The irony of Steve Bruce talking about staying fit and healthy. He's a bargain bucket away from intensive care.

Dawson Ndidi cards Tielemans and Lingard 2+ SOT