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As we all know, Liverpool Football Club is special. Different. Classy. Unique. Special. Unique. Classy. Unique. Iconic. Unique. Special. Unique. Clubby. Clubbish. Clubesque. Special. Unique. Increasingly irrelevant. Over the hill. Past-it. Yesterday’s news. Special. Unique. Iconic. Unique. Special. Special. Special. Unique. Liverpool Football Club are special. And unique. And special. And classy. They’re special and specially unique and uniquely specially and specially special and uniquely classy and they have a different way of doing things, you wouldn’t understand, you just wouldn’t, because you’re not special, or classy, or unique, you’re not Liverpool Football Club, and you wouldn’t understand, so don’t even bother, just accept it, they’re the best football team in the tra-la-la-la land.

 

Liverpool Football Club’s specialness and uniqueness and classiness naturally places them in a position to pat lesser clubs on the head and let them know of their place in the food chain. Clubs, say, like Southampton, who were browbeaten into selling Adam Lallana and Dejan Lovren to mighty Liverpool last summer. “They have a choice as a club,” Liverpool’s head guru, Brendan Rodgers, roared last August. “They don’t have to sell. You have a choice. Maybe Southampton’s objectives have changed. They were looking to be a [big Cup] club, I believe. They obviously wanted to change. There might be one or two others who leave. It’s just the way it works.” It’s. Just. The. Way. It. Works.

 

Words to live by. Poetry in motion that comes to mind now that Raheem Sterling is busy letting Liverpool know that the way it works is that he would like to leave in the summer, maybe join a bigger club, play for a team who actually have a chance of winning something in the near future, that there’s only so many times he can hear about the Miraculous Miracle of Istanbul before he’s forced to go all Van Gogh on his ears.

 

Treason! Naturally Sterling’s desire to play for a good team has been met with fury and The Fiver assumes he has spent the day locked in Melwood’s Re-education Chamber, a crack team of Phil Thompson, John Bishop and John Aldridge taking it in turns to hammer home the uniqueness and specialness and classiness of Liverpool Football Club, making sure Sterling knows that he will forever walk alone if he joins Manchester City, a terrifying prospect indeed. It’s just the way it works.

 

Guardian article.  Wow.

 

Worth subscribing to the Guardian Fiver daily email - it's often got a fantastic anti-liverpool bias.

 

http://www.theguardian.com/football/series/thefiver

 

 

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Posted the link to that article with the comment "It's hard work being a Toon fans these days, but I can still laugh at Liverpool."

 

Even though I am literally half a world away, two 30-something mates who are Liverpool fans were on it like white on rice. The first was all "Fuck Raheem" and added some Shankly lovefest meme, the other asked, genuinely oblivious, what was so funny about the article.

 

It seems that even Australian Liverpool fans fit the special and unique cliches...

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As we all know, Liverpool Football Club is special. Different. Classy. Unique. Special. Unique. Classy. Unique. Iconic. Unique. Special. Unique. Clubby. Clubbish. Clubesque. Special. Unique. Increasingly irrelevant. Over the hill. Past-it. Yesterday’s news. Special. Unique. Iconic. Unique. Special. Special. Special. Unique. Liverpool Football Club are special. And unique. And special. And classy. They’re special and specially unique and uniquely specially and specially special and uniquely classy and they have a different way of doing things, you wouldn’t understand, you just wouldn’t, because you’re not special, or classy, or unique, you’re not Liverpool Football Club, and you wouldn’t understand, so don’t even bother, just accept it, they’re the best football team in the tra-la-la-la land.

 

Liverpool Football Club’s specialness and uniqueness and classiness naturally places them in a position to pat lesser clubs on the head and let them know of their place in the food chain. Clubs, say, like Southampton, who were browbeaten into selling Adam Lallana and Dejan Lovren to mighty Liverpool last summer. “They have a choice as a club,” Liverpool’s head guru, Brendan Rodgers, roared last August. “They don’t have to sell. You have a choice. Maybe Southampton’s objectives have changed. They were looking to be a [big Cup] club, I believe. They obviously wanted to change. There might be one or two others who leave. It’s just the way it works.” It’s. Just. The. Way. It. Works.

 

Words to live by. Poetry in motion that comes to mind now that Raheem Sterling is busy letting Liverpool know that the way it works is that he would like to leave in the summer, maybe join a bigger club, play for a team who actually have a chance of winning something in the near future, that there’s only so many times he can hear about the Miraculous Miracle of Istanbul before he’s forced to go all Van Gogh on his ears.

 

Treason! Naturally Sterling’s desire to play for a good team has been met with fury and The Fiver assumes he has spent the day locked in Melwood’s Re-education Chamber, a crack team of Phil Thompson, John Bishop and John Aldridge taking it in turns to hammer home the uniqueness and specialness and classiness of Liverpool Football Club, making sure Sterling knows that he will forever walk alone if he joins Manchester City, a terrifying prospect indeed. It’s just the way it works.

 

Guardian article.  Wow.

 

Worth subscribing to the Guardian Fiver daily email - it's often got a fantastic anti-liverpool bias.

 

http://www.theguardian.com/football/series/thefiver

 

 

 

fiver aren't anti-anyone really, they take the piss out of absolutely everyone they possibly can

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I must admit, I find it distinctly funny that everyone is treating Gerrard's move to MLS exactly like a retirement.

 

That's gotta hurt if you're an MLS fan :D

 

Aye, imagine having that cunt move to your league, poor sods.

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He could well be. Signing duffers and mismanaging Sterling doesn't bode well.

I think he's mismanaged Sterling because rumours sell papers so there will always be speculation.

Mourinho simply said that Hazard would cost 100M a leg.

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what was that figure someone quoted about sterling, in refusing to sign a new contract he's already missed out on 3m in wages or something?  and they're looking to hold him to the remaining 2 years....

 

something will break, no way he stays there without signing a new contract

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what was that figure someone quoted about sterling, in refusing to sign a new contract he's already missed out on 3m in wages or something?  and they're looking to hold him to the remaining 2 years....

 

something will break, no way he stays there without signing a new contract

he'd be expensive enough to replace so theres no way the money men will allow him to stay while he won't sign a new deal

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what was that figure someone quoted about sterling, in refusing to sign a new contract he's already missed out on 3m in wages or something?  and they're looking to hold him to the remaining 2 years....

 

something will break, no way he stays there without signing a new contract

he'd be expensive enough to replace so theres no way the money men will allow him to stay while he won't sign a new deal

 

aye he's got to go, they just need to fleece the best price they can for him really

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They finish the season having conceded only three goals fewer than relegated Burnley.

They've finished sixth with a goal difference of only +4, which is like us when we finished fifth.

Finishing high up the league with a very low goal difference is a bad pointer toward the following season. It suggests such high position is not sustainable.

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They finish the season having conceded only three goals fewer than relegated Burnley.

They've finished sixth with a goal difference of only +4, which is like us when we finished fifth.

Finishing high up the league with a very low goal difference is a bad pointer toward the following season. It suggests such high position is not sustainable.

f

 

It would in our case, but theirs suggests losing suarez and sturridge for most of the season whilst signing a total donkey in Balotelli has hit them hard.

 

They'll buy one or two strikers, let mario go, and return to being a 5th place team believing they can be league challengers.

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