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Some vaguely amusing football jocularity


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  • 2 weeks later...





Arsenal Football Club - Cruel banal footballs

Aston Villa - Vital loans


Barnsley Football Club - Fatal bully on cobblers - Flabby brutal colonels

Birmingham City - I’m marching by it

Blackburn Rovers - Verbal cork burns

Blackpool lose - Lockable loops

Bolton Wanderers - Now nerd bloaters

Bournemouth Football Club - Flout uncool blabbermouth

Bradford City - Do crafty bird

Brentford Football Club - Cold blob not rat bluffer

Brighton and Hove Albion - In hangover in blood bath

Bristol City - Tits boil, cry?

Bristol Rovers - River rot slobs

Burnley Football - Foul ball rentboy

Bury, The Shakers - Hey brute sharks


Cambridge United - Abducted in grime

Cardiff City - Daffy critic

Carlisle United - Ritual declines

Charlton Athletic - Clitoral chat then - Halt technical rot

Chelsea Football Club - Callous fat leech blob

Cheltenham - The calm hen

Chesterfield - Heretics fled

Colchester United - Leech destruction

Coventry - Corny vet

Crewe Alexander - New relaxed race

Crystal Palace - Repay catcalls


Darlington FC - Farting ‘n cold

Derby County - Dunce by Tory


Everton Football Club - Lovelorn, fat, cute blob

Exeter City Football Club - Bully or toxic beef cattle


Fulham FC - Calm huff


Gillingham Football - I’m a golf ball on light

Grimsby Town - My wrong bits


Halifax Town - Fix what loan?

Hartlepool - Polar hotel

Huddersfield - Rushed fiddle

Hull City Football Club - Full tallyho cubic bolt


Ipswich Town - Cow with spin


Kidderminster - Timed drinkers


Leeds United - Sudden elite - Tuned diesel - I needed slut

Leicester City - Electric Yetis

Leyton Orient - Entirety loon

Lincoln City FC - Noncyclic lift

Liverpool FC - Pelvic floor

Luton Twon - Not low nut


Macclesfield Town - Damn wife collects

Manchester City - Synthetic cream - I’m shy, can’t erect

Manchester Utd - Rent hated scum - Urine detachments - The Entrained Scum - Stained hen rectum - Scum need the train

Mansfield - Damn flies

Middlesbrough - His odd grumble

Millwall Football Club - Tall calm blob will foul


Newcastle United - Wet dense lunatic

Northampton Town - Want month to porn

Nottingham Forest - Fat hogs in torment

Notts County - On snotty cut

Norwich Football Club - Flout chronic blob law


Oldham Athletic - Macho till hated

Oxford United - An odd fixture


Peterborough - The poorer bug

Plymouth Argyle - Really got humpy

Portsmouth - Rum hotpots

Port Vale - Apt lover

Preston North End - Not the porn nerds


Queens Park Rangers - Queer spankers rang


Reading FC - Grind cafe

Rochdale Football - The drab fool local

Rotherham - Mr heath or

Rushden & Diamonds - So mad, and in hundreds


Scunthorpe United - Hedonist puncture

Sheffield United - The fluid defines

Sheffield Wednesday - Wish safely defended

Shrewsbury Town - Snowy brew hurts

Southampton - Phantoms out

Southend - Hot nudes

Stockport Football - Bollocks of top tart

Stoke City - Stocky tie

Sunderland - Nun ladders

Swansea - A new ass

Swindon Town - Down not wins


Tranmere Rovers - Smarter or never

Torquay United - Tiny rude quota

Tottenham Hotspur - To the posh tantrum


Walsall Football - Ball a lot of walls

Watford Football - Afford total blow

West Bromich Albion - I am two inch slobber

West Ham United - With nude mates - I am the new dust

Wigan Athletic - What giant lice - A genital witch

Wimbledon - Mind bowel

Wolverhampton Wanderers FC - Flame thrower now vends crap - Old Woman perverts raw hen - Worst ever home drawn plan

Wrexham Football Club - A full matchbox bowler

Wycombe Wanderers - A screwy brew demon


York City - Yo!, tricky





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