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C*CK P*SS P*RDEW


themanupstairs

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From that redcafe thread :

 

He's that guy you play Sunday league with; older bloke, not sure who knows him, doesn't socialise, turns up wearing stonewashed jeans and a old rain jacket, absolutely whippet fit, always walking around naked in the changing room

 

[emoji1] [emoji1]

 

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I liked this one better:

 

"He is that sad middle aged guy at the pub that comes over to your table, tells shit jokes and tries to hit on every girl 22 years his junior, with some sleezy groping involved. When all else fails he takes to the scene and performs a shit karaoke act before he is tossed out by the bouncer and arrested for assaulting a taxi cab driver."

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I liked this one better:

 

"He is that sad middle aged guy at the pub that comes over to your table, tells s*** jokes and tries to hit on every girl 22 years his junior, with some sleezy groping involved. When all else fails he takes to the scene and performs a s*** karaoke act before he is tossed out by the bouncer and arrested for assaulting a taxi cab driver."

 

;D

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Keep hearing "experts" say "he's a good manager" about Pardew but no one asks them WHY they think he's a good manager. I'd love to hear their replies because all the evidence clearly points to him being a f***ing useless c***.

 

Carragher says he plays attacking football.

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Can't stand him. His career is groundhog day. Starts well, gets his side playing pretty good football. Then he reverts to type, playing a flat 4-4-2 with defensive wingers and full backs who aren't allowed to go forward. He did at Newcastle. Got them to 5th, then bombed by parking the bus and showing no ambition or adventure. He's doing it at Palace now, bright start with direct and effective football, and it's now turning to shit. If Wilf Zaha isn't on it - like he wasn't tonight - they've got nothing but pot shots and set pieces. He doesn't even make attacking substitutions. Plenty thought Newcastle fans were mad for wanting him gone, but they were right. They were going nowhere, and it was getting worse. And he's also a colossal cnut.

 

:snod:

 

 

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Can't stand him. His career is groundhog day. Starts well, gets his side playing pretty good football. Then he reverts to type, playing a flat 4-4-2 with defensive wingers and full backs who aren't allowed to go forward. He did at Newcastle. Got them to 5th, then bombed by parking the bus and showing no ambition or adventure. He's doing it at Palace now, bright start with direct and effective football, and it's now turning to shit. If Wilf Zaha isn't on it - like he wasn't tonight - they've got nothing but pot shots and set pieces. He doesn't even make attacking substitutions. Plenty thought Newcastle fans were mad for wanting him gone, but they were right. They were going nowhere, and it was getting worse. And he's also a colossal cnut.

 

:snod:

 

 

 

He'd probably have as much success commanding the tides as he does commanding his team.

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You just know though, even if they sack him and still go down, relegation will be blamed on sacking Pardew. Even though it was an inevitability like our two relegation scraps were after he left, unless they appoint a world-class manager. The rot's set in now.

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None of the British based pundits will slate him, theyll all be golf buddies and members of the pfa or the fma.  Theyll not endanger one of their jobs for a member.  Which is hugely dishonest as everyobe can see he is bloody awful. 

 

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None of the British based pundits will slate him, theyll all be golf buddies and members of the pfa or the fma.  Theyll not endanger one of their jobs for a member.  Which is hugely dishonest as everyobe can see he is bloody awful.

 

Thats ^^^^ exactly how it is.

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Keep hearing "experts" say "he's a good manager" about Pardew but no one asks them WHY they think he's a good manager. I'd love to hear their replies because all the evidence clearly points to him being a f***ing useless c***.

 

Carragher says he plays attacking football.

He does with Palace tbf, lately anyway. Seems to just have two extremes, all out attack or last ditch defend like fuck

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From Red Cafe

 

This is a good little read, from Steve Bacon, from when Pardew was at West Ham, just in case you had any apprehension as to whether or not Pardew is a t***:

 

“I don’t like Alan Pardew. There, I’ve said it. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever known a more arrogant person in my life. We never got on from the first moment we met – and our relationship deteriorated from there. There was one occasion when I threatened to stick a fork in his hand. I was sort of joking, but there were definitely times when I felt like swinging at him. Or telling him to fork off, if you follow my drift.”

 

“Let me tell you a story. In fact, it’s called the ‘King story’ among those who were present and who believe it’s a perfect example of Pardew’s arrogance. We were staying at a hotel in the North East ahead of a game at Sunderland during Alan’s first season in charge and were about to have our Friday evening meal. The players were restricted to boiled chicken or pasta, or suchlike, whereas the rest of the West Ham party had the choice of the entire menu. I sat down with Pardew, kit manager Eddie Gillam, physiotherapist John Green and fitness coach Tony Strudwick, who now works for Manchester United and has done very well for himself. We ordered our meals and suddenly Pardew asked us all what we were having. I think Eddie said he’d gone for the chicken, while I’d chosen the steak. Pards then turned to Struds, who revealed whatever it was he’d asked for. ‘That sounds good,’ said Pards. ‘Tell you what; if yours is better than mine when it turns up, I’m having that.’ That was one of the things he’d always say: I’m having that. ‘See that bloke’s haircut? I’m having that.’ He said it all the time. Anyway, I wasn’t ‘having that’ at all. So I said, ‘Well, you’re certainly not having my dinner. You’ll get a fork in the back of your hand!’ Pardew sort of laughed, before turning back to Struds and saying, ‘Yeah, if yours is better than mine, I’m having that.’ Our meals eventually arrived and Pards looked at Tony and said, ‘Yeah, I was right, yours definitely looks much better than mine; I’m having that.’ And he went to swap the plates over. ‘You can’t do that!’ I said. ‘What do you mean?’ he asked. ‘You can’t just take somebody else’s dinner,’ I said in disbelief. And he replied, without any hint of a joke, ‘When you’re the King, you can do anything.’ Eddie, Tony, John and I just looked at each other and there was an uncomfortable silence for a moment. Struds was a nice guy but he could be a bit of a ‘yes man’ at times and so he just allowed Pardew to swap the plates. However, the rest of us were flabbergasted by it all and we ended up discussing what had happened in the bar. Alan kept a straight face when referring to himself as ‘the King’ and I just couldn’t believe the arrogance of the man.”

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